The Most Sensible Daughter Chose to Die

Early on Christmas Eve, my older sister, Jessica Carter, and little brother, Tommy Carter, rushed over to Mom, clinging to her legs as they bounced around and sang Christmas carols.

Mom beamed and handed Jessica a Christmas card stuffed with cash. "Jessica, there's 200 dollars in there. Buy yourself whatever books you want. Don't worry about the price!"

Then she gave Tommy a Christmas card featuring his favorite cartoon character and ruffled his hair. "Merry Christmas, Tommy! There's 50 dollars in there. Go buy yourself some candy!"

Finally, she turned to me, and her smile faded a little.

I jumped up before she could say anything. "Mom, I don't need any Christmas money! Really, I'm fine…"

Mom paused, then nodded approvingly. "You've always been such an easy child. You know how hard your dad and I work to support this family."

She took two one-dollar bills from her purse and pressed them into my hand. "Here. Buy yourself something nice."

Then she turned to Jessica and Tommy. "You two could stand to be a little more like Riley."

But Jessica and Tommy had already run off with their Christmas money, barely listening to Mom.

I folded the two dollars and tucked it into my pocket, then quietly cleared the table.

Mom smiled approvingly. Seeing Mom smile at me like that made me feel all warm inside.

See? As long as I kept being good and never caused any trouble, Mom and Dad would love me more.

I wanted to go on that fancy cruise and feel special for once, too. But if I didn't volunteer to stay behind, I'd put Mom and Dad in a difficult position.

By noon, Mom had called Jessica and Tommy several times before they finally came out of their rooms, dressed and ready to leave. "What's taking you two so long? I should've let Riley help you pack. She'd have been done ages ago."

I looked up, startled.

Jessica and Tommy wore matching Christmas sweaters with a reindeer leaping across the front. They looked adorable.

Even Mom and Dad had matching Christmas sweaters!

Just then, Mom called me into her room.

My heart raced. Was she going to give me a matching sweater, too?

Instead, Mom dug an old outfit and a pair of shoes out of the back of the closet. "Try these on, Riley. They were Jessica's Christmas clothes from last year. She barely wore them, so they're still in good shape."

Dust rose from the clothes. Mom quickly covered her nose, dropped them on the floor, and doubled over, coughing.

I quietly picked up the clothes and put them on.

Jessica was taller and bigger than I was, so the outfit hung on me like a sack.

I forced my feet into her old leather shoes, but they pinched painfully.

Still covering her nose, Mom asked, "Do you like them?"

I looked at the bright red reindeer on the front and nodded, pretending I liked it.

At least the reindeer looked festive, I told myself.

"See? Riley's never any trouble. She never even asks for new clothes."

At 2:00 pm, Dad brought out four brand-new suitcases.

Jessica and Tommy each had a colorful suitcase covered in cartoon characters. They bounced toward the car, dragging their suitcases behind them.

I stood by the door with Jessica's old backpack on my back.

The cartoon print had almost faded, and the straps had broken more than once, but the backpack was still usable.

Dad drove me to the bus station.

Mom handed me my ticket, hugged me, and smiled warmly. "Be a good girl and keep Grandma company. We'll be back in a few days!"

I climbed onto the bus and took a window seat.

I didn't ask Mom to walk me to my seat. I didn't want to hold her up.

As the bus pulled away, I saw Mom handing Jessica and Tommy each a candy apple.

Tommy held his candy apple up and squealed, "I get to stay in a huge room with an ocean view tonight!"

I watched them longingly until the bus turned the corner and they disappeared from sight.

They'd bring me a seashell necklace when they came back, wouldn't they?

The seashells from Cranford had to be beautiful.

The bus finally arrived at ten that night.

The wind howled in the darkness. I huddled inside Jessica's old winter coat, adjusted my backpack, and made my way nervously down the dark road.

Feeling the two dollars in my pocket, I finally worked up the courage to turn around and head to the corner store.

I bought a bag of butterscotch candies for Grandma. She loved sweets.

The yard was pitch-black, and Buddy, our big dog who usually stayed outside, was nowhere to be seen.

I eased the door open. The lights were off, and the house was freezing. "Grandma? I'm home," I called out softly.

No one answered.

The only sound was the wind whistling outside.

I felt my way through the darkness to Grandma's bed.

In the faint moonlight, I saw her lying beneath a thick quilt. "Grandma? Are you asleep?"

I tiptoed closer, reaching out to tuck the quilt around her.

But the quilt was cold.

Grandma's hand hung over the edge of the bed. It was cold, too.

I gently shook her shoulder and called softly, "Grandma, wake up. I brought you butterscotch candies."

She didn't move a muscle.

Panic washed over me.

I held my hand beneath her nose, trying to feel her breath. There was nothing.

Then I pressed my ear to her chest, listening to a heartbeat. There was none…