Chapter 54

Cassian’s POV

The letter shouldn’t have rattled me.

But it did.

He managed to take everything away from me and now? I had no idea what to expect

What was wrapped beautifully behind the satin envelope.

I cracked it open anyway.

“I trust this reaches you well, dear brother. I intend to visit within the month. I believe it’s time we cleared the air…officially. I’ll await your reply. But I suggest you begin preparations.”

Arrogant bastard.

No date. No reason. No apology.

No signature.

He didn’t need one.

“Want me to piss on it before we burn it?”

I jerked at the sound of his voice

Zevran had that power…to make me anxious even in his absence.

I didn’t look up. “He’s coming.”

“Unfortunately.”

I tossed the letter toward the desk. It landed like a loaded weapon.

“He wants to ‘clear the air,’”

Even I didn’t understand what he meant by that, but it didn’t change that a part of me was curious.

“Yeah? So did the last wildfire.” Conrad strode in and picked up the letter. “No signature. Classy.”

“Always was.”

He scanned the words with a smirk. “He’s baiting you.”

“And it’s working,” I muttered.

“So what’s the plan?” Conrad asked, dropping into the chair across from me. “Ritual combat or poisoned wine?”

“I’m moving the mating ceremony forward.”

His brows shot up. “So, ritual combat it is.”

I didn’t answer.

Conrad tilted his head. “You’re serious.”

“I’ve already sent word to the council elders. I want it on the calendar before Zevran even crosses the border.”

He leaned back, rubbing his jaw. “Fast-tracking a lifetime commitment to make your brother jealous. That’s new, even for you.”

“It’s not about jealousy,” I corrected. “It’s about strategy.”

“And the bride?”

I stilled.

“She doesn’t know, does she?” he added.

“I’m going to tell her.”

“When? Before or after she walks into a ball thinking she’s still a nanny?”

“Don’t start,”

“I’m not starting, I’m watching you self-sabotage in real time.”

I drained the rest of my whiskey and slammed the glass down.

“She’s not just….”

I couldn’t even complete the words, because I knew that somewhere along the line, I had side tracked and lost track of what exactly she was.

“No,” he didn’t say it like it was a challenge… if anything he looked more relaxed than ever. “She’s the woman you kissed and ghosted like a teenager.”

“I didn’t ghost her.”

“You kissed her. Then left her to tend to your daughter’s health. I really did want to ask a lot of questions last night… but you and I know I don’t do phone calls.”

“She didn’t say anything either,” I snapped.

“Because she probably thought she imagined it,” he retorted. “Gods, Cassian, you act like if you don’t say something out loud, it’ll stop being real.”

I ran a hand down my face. “She’s been through too much already.”

“And you think springing a mating ceremony on her will lessen the trauma?”

I stood, needing to move, needing space I didn’t have. “This isn’t just about us.”

“No,” Conrad said quietly. “But it starts there.”

Silence fell.

Only the crackle of fire filled the room.

Conrad spoke first. “You think she’ll say no?”

“I think she won’t say anything. She’ll just leave.”

“Because you keep treating her like a threat instead of a choice.”

My chest tightened. “I didn’t mean to.”

“She’s not a distraction, Cass. She’s your mate. Fated or not, she’s here. She stayed. And you’re treating her like a ticking clock.”

“She’s temporary,” I muttered.

“Is that what you want?”

“No.”

“Then stop pretending she is.”

I grabbed the decanter and poured another drink.

Conrad eyed me. “That’s your third.”

“Maybe it’ll help me find the right words.”

“She doesn’t need poetry,” he said. “She needs honesty. Straight-up, eyes-on-hers, no-bullshit truth.”

I sipped. “You really think she’ll stay?”

“I think she already has. But every day you keep her in the dark, you pull her closer to the door.”

He paused.

“And Zevran? He’ll find that door. He’ll knock. And he’ll twist her right out from under you.”

I stared into the fire. “She doesn’t even know Zevran and I are related.”

“You’re kidding.”

“I didn’t want her involved.”

“She’s already involved, Cassian. She lives here. She’s raising Sisi. She’s in your damn bedroom every night.”

I looked away. “It wasn’t supposed to go this far.”

“Yeah?” Conrad scoffed. “What part exactly? The part where your daughter called her ‘Mummy’? Or the part where you look at her like she’s the only light you remember?”

I didn’t respond.

Because he was right.

All of it. Every damn word.

“I’m scared,” I admitted.

Conrad blinked.

“Not of her,” I added. “Of what this means. Of not being enough. Of becoming the person I was when I was still with them .”

Conrad didn’t say anything, I watched his hands extend instead, as he poured himself another glass of the drink.

“You’re no longer that person, Cass,” he didn’t spare me a glance. “But if you keep running from her… you’re sure as hell going to end up just like him.”

I clenched my fists.

“What if I tell her and she walks away?”

“Then at least she walked away knowing the truth. That’s more than you ever got.”

My throat felt tight. Too tight. I hated this.

“I’m not ready.”

“She doesn’t need you to be ready,” Conrad said. “She just needs you to be real.”

He stood, grabbing his jacket.

“And stop drinking like that,” he added. “You’re not the only one who loses if you drown.”

I gave a bitter laugh. “I’m already drowning.”

“Then let her pull you out.”

He walked toward the door, then paused.

“When Zevran arrives, this entire place becomes a war zone. You better decide whose side you’re on before that happens.”

And then he was gone.

I stood there, still, with the wind clawing at the windows and her name clawing at my chest.

Selena.

I wanted to tell her everything.

But wanting and doing were different beasts.

And I wasn’t sure I could tame either.