Chapter One: Love versus Value

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1^st January

It was Monday morning at about 5:30 a.m. on the 1^st of January, 2018 that he proposed to me and from that moment everything seemed different. I could not even hear my name being screamed because I was lost in my own thoughts and fantasy world.

In my mind, we were already married and on our all-expense-paid cruise to Miami, only to be joggled back to reality by a tap from my kid sister, Hannah who said to me, 'Olivia, wake up. You will be late for vigil.'

I stood up reluctantly, shaking my head and saying to myself, 'so it was just a dream.' it was New Year's Eve. well, goodbye 2017.

Note: Miami is the cultural, economical and financial center of South Florida and it is home to about 6.1million people; it’s the seventh-largest metropolitan area in The United States. Its beauty is very unique, the waters, tourist centers plus its county, Miami-Dade are what intrigues Olivia about Miami.

I dressed up quickly as it was 7 pm and the crossover service was to start at 8 pm. I and my family lived at Wuye, a district in Abuja and our church was at Kubwa, also in Abuja; which was about a thirty-five minutes’ drive from Wuye. My dad drove us to church. The anticipation to scream out loud ‘HAPPY NEW YEAR!’  was in the air but all I could think of was being with Peter for the rest of my life.

My church was a very big auditorium painted in white and red oil paint outside, there is this very big cross hanging on the roof outside the building decorated in pure gold, inside is pure white POP and gold paintings at the corners of the wall, it is really a sight to behold. The doors are made of glass except for the main metallic bulletproof door. I had always attended the church since birth and my parents were very churchy, so I grew up so religious. My dad is a deacon in the church while mum takes care of the children's Sunday school service. Yes, I love my life but I have never really seen the other side of life, I believe saying yes to Peter would change everything and give me the exposure I am looking for.

We got to church and I saw Peter. He was invited for a special, which he performed with a box guitar. I was in awe as I loved the guitar and enjoyed listening to it.

Several songs and prayers went on, the choristers sang New Jerusalem. Our pastor ministered and at exactly 12am, he said, 'brethren, it’s exactly 12am. Happy New Year!’ he bellowed. ‘Walk around, shake someone’s hand, hug someone, and welcome them to 2018.'

We sang and danced a little and by 12:30 am, we prayed and closed the service. I greeted some people but avoided Peter. Somehow, I was feeling shy, I could not look steadily at him even while he sang. Still, I quickly grabbed my phone after service that day, called him, and said yes to his proposal from two years ago so as to relieve my heart of its anxiety.

Peter is a very tall guy, one who loves the gym, handsome, every girl's dream man, a really lovely person. He loves the color blue and looked so good in it that I secretly stir admiring him. This has gone on for years but I was scared of who he was and how I'd be with him. As I sat there searching my mind I could not help but remember how we met. It was on a Wednesday, February 10, 2016, when I was at the mall with my elder brother John. We had finished shopping and were next in line to pay when he realized he had forgotten his Automated Teller Machine (ATM) card at home, devastated and stranded, we moved out of the line and made a turn to return the purchased goods when Peter walked up to us.

‘Pardon my manners, I am Peter he smiled. Standing over there I noticed you were stranded. I have been watching you, you can't go home and come back come over here it must really be stressful; here take mine and pay then you could transfer back to me when you are done. We were astonished at how kind-hearted he was. John quickly took the card, collected Peter's account details, thanked him, and proceeded to pay for our goods while I stood waiting with Peter. You're a very beautiful lady, your black is astonishing, and suits you perfectly. He kept on smiling while I said I'm Mercy, pleased to meet you. Your contact? I obliged and from then we kept in touch till date.

Peter and I grew closer daily, I invited him to church a couple of times and then he decided to continue worshipping with us, and with time his family joined too. He visited at home from time to time and I too grew familiar with his family too. It was no mistake we met, God planned it all since then I never spend a day without talking to him.

On 14 April same year he asked me to be his girlfriend but I would not, I felt it too soon, I felt he was a cheat because he was too cute, I felt we were too young and I wasn't ready to be in any relationship what so ever but I had this massive crush on him which made me drawn to him. His height, his brown skin, bulgy eyes, curly hair, his built body, he was a perfect specimen, a total package. One time when we talked I told him God must have created him with a special soil; not as perfect as yours he cooed, you're a full 10/10, all-around special package. Well, it's been two years now and all I want and think about is to be with him, a perfect pair, made in heaven.

I juggled back to reality, smiling profusely. This was the beginning of our love life, ‘Olivia and Peter.’ I had refused his earlier advances because I was older and concerned that he would give up on me in no time but it’s been two long years and he’s been holding on and this made me fall for him.

That morning, the wind was different. I gladly attacked the entire house chores with smiles beaming all over my face. This wasn’t my usual smile. This was from a joy coming from within. I could feel he too was filled with extreme joy.

I felt like running around and screaming ‘I’m with Boo,’ as I fondly called him. However, some level of caution hit me because he was younger than I was by two years-and in the part of the world where we come from, this was an issue.

Beneath my excitement was the thought of what mum would say: ‘Olivia get a man who’s ready to settle and not a boy'. She had never stopped to seize any opportunity to tell me not to date a younger person, she’d always give reasons like, 'it’s okay now but when you’ll be turning 40 and he’s 38, that’s when he’d remind you he had married you out of pity and tell you you’re old. For now, it’s all beauty and love but then it would be despise, disgust and hatred, while your beauty fades, he goes for a younger version, take a cue from Mr. Simon and his wife, he got a younger girl. No daughter of mine would go through that be warned, I would not stand for that... the sermon continues'.

But the heart wants what it wants and mine yearns for Peter. So while my heart was glad and overjoyed, my head was searching out ways to curb this problem. Love was a two-faced individual to me - a friend and a foe.

Peter always told me he wanted to be a developer and he was always busy trying to develop some software, mostly games. He was super good with the computer and I would always ask his help in technology-related areas. He was also a first-year student at the Federal University of Technology, Akure. Though he had a National Diploma (ND) in Petroleum Engineering from Petroleum Trust Institute (PTI), Warri in Delta state, but my family couldn't care less because I was already a graduate.

Thus began the war in my head: my love for their values. Which would prevail? I had my mind made up that I would be with Boo however things may unfold. They’d have to key into it; they have no choice. I would always say to silence my raging thoughts.

After finishing my chores, I was eager to see Peter on the morning of the first day of the new year.  He usually visited, of course, but on this day, time seemed terribly slow. A second felt like an hour to me, even a snail moves faster.

The time was about ten minutes past nine. The anxiety was palpable and I could feel my heart racing and my breathing super high.

I decided to nap a little before he'd come, but the anticipation of seeing him didn't let me. By 10:30 am, I heard a knock, I got up reluctantly. It’d be one of mum's friends. Mum and I were the only ones at home and she was asleep, while my older brother, John, and my kid sister, Hannah, had both gone out with friends.

When I opened the door, it was Peter, standing there smiling. He had a small bag in his hand and another on his back. I threw my arms around him and hugged him tightly like never before. Easy pumpkin he smiled. 'Welcome Boo,' I said, flashing smiles, as we went to my room.

In my room, he gave me the small bag in his hand and said,'This is is for you.' It was perfume. 'Red Door', I cooed.

It was an Elizabeth Arden’s perfume which I loved so much. He told me he had begged his dad to get it for him as a present for his girlfriend, Olivia. Peter’s family had a different notion about relationships. They believed age wasn’t an issue so long it’s not more than two years and for some reason, Peter’s mom and dad were fond of me and secretly wished I would end up with their son, they never missed a moment to chip it in whenever they saw together. Words like she's very beautiful with a good character they would tell him and wink at me. It makes me blush, they are extremely loving.

They had always mistaken our closeness to be that we were dating so they referred to me as his girlfriend long before he had asked me out. But again Peter’s mom was also scared about the age thing. She believed my family would never allow it, she would always ask me when I intended to tell my parents and I would reply by saying we were just good friends. She would smile and give me the, 'I doubt that kind of look.

I hugged and thanked him for it but Peter would not oblige but rather said, 'Olivia, just a hug wouldn't cut it for your boyfriend, I would not accept it you know that right? not even a kiss?

I froze. He was my first boyfriend; I had never had one before now. Several thoughts were flying across my mind regarding what I would do. How do I tell him I do not have the slightest clue on how to kiss? I had always been a shy girl who scarcely had friends, let alone a boyfriend. I was a loner, one who enjoyed solitude and the company of myself. I was sure I could not kiss but I just can not tell him.

It seemed Peter could sense my unease. He took my hand and asked me to breathe. I quickly offered a lame excuse saying what if Mum walked in. Still holding my hand, he spoke softly, assuring me that Mum wasn’t within earshot and besides, the door was closed, besides baby you have your own room, what could go wrong? Just trust me, I got you.

He grinned and gave a smirk saying, ‘come on girlfriend.’ I whispered underneath my breath, ‘Boo, I haven’t done this before. He smiled. ‘A twenty-three-year-old who has never kissed a boy before… That’s not something you see every day.’ Kissing my forehead unexpectedly, he whispered, you are beautiful, your height is perfect for a woman, you are like a goddess, a woman of character, flawless black, the scar by your ear complements your flawless beauty, you are one in a million and anyone who finds you find a good thing baby’ follow my lead, Olivia’.

Flattery would get you everywhere, I chuckled as he pulled me in, hands behind my head gently he leaned in for the kiss and I did follow his lead. I kiss your upper lip you kiss my lower and vice versa ‘See Olivia, it isn’t that difficult.’ it's not rocket science he muttered almost inaudibly.

‘Yea, Pete, it isn’t.’ this time, I kissed him. I liked the experience and I wanted more. After I’ve had enough, I pulled out placing my head on his fast-beating chest; he whispered breathlessly that we should see a movie on his tablet.

This feeling was new to me; my heart was not just beating-or was it? It was racing!  Peter teased me about it saying, ‘she may be older, but not in all facets it appears. Grow up baby’.

I couldn’t concentrate anymore on the animation we were seeing because my mind was far away and I didn’t realize I was speaking out my thoughts until he kissed me again and said, ‘baby, I’ve got you, baby girl.’

I replied, ‘I love you, Boo.'

Peter’s stare was like an x-ray like he was seeing through me. I couldn’t understand this feeling but totally I loved it. ‘I have a boyfriend’, I mused to myself. Peter smiled and kissed my cheek.

‘I finally have the lady of my dreams’.

He began singing When He Kissed Me by Shania Twain and a lot of other love songs, just mixing up love songs. I could only smile. He was quite a singer too.

At 3 pm, Mum knocked on the door and walked in to ask if I would love to go out with her, but when she saw Peter, she just smiled.

‘And if it isn’t the singing sensation, Peter… you never cease to wow us with your singing. But I need you to do me a favor. Please help me tell your bestie Olivia that it is perfectly normal to leave the house once in a while and get to meet with friends and that it is also healthy to have friends visit the house.

‘Yes ma’am,’ Pete replied. I followed her to the door, hugged her. ‘Don’t do what you wouldn’t tell me,’ she said, I replied with a wink.

Peter stayed with me until at least one member of my family was back and then left my house by 8 pm. We kissed goodnight.