Chapter 2

Two.

All I want is a peaceful life. A life that I can consider as my own. I got no family to lean on every time I need some help or troubled mind. Yes, I do have my tita’s and tito’s, as well as my cousins, but then I still feel so alone. Minsan natanong ko na rin ang sarili ko, kung tunay nga ba akong Cassidy, kung parte ba talaga ako ng pamilya, kasi kahit na anong gawin ko, wala akong maramdaman na pagmamahal galing sa taong nag-iisa na lang sa buhay ko, my dad.

I tried everything to please him before, nag-aral ako nang mabuti, pero hindi iyon naging sapat para makuha ko ang atensyon ni Dad. Kaya isang araw nagising na lang ako na hindi na siya hinihintay. Hindi na ako umasa pa na mapapansin niya ako.

"IKAW NA BATA KA!" The oldy exclaimed as soon as I entered the mansion.

My brows furrowed. What's wrong with this amoy lupa again? She's surrounded by dark aura while trying to compress herself. I just rolled my eyes and shrugged my head.

"Hindi ka ba talaga titino?"

Ganito ko madalas makuha ang atensyon nila, kapag may nagagawa ako na ayaw nila. Attention. I’m not an attention seeker it’s just that I just want them to look at me straight to my eyes that they care. That’s why I make things that will annoy them as my hobby too, so I can get their attention even just for a couple of minutes.

My brows furrowed. How did she got that? "Are you spying me?" I asked, surprised.

"Apologize to Professor Cruz tomorrow!" She's pointing her stick at me while saying her sermon.

Apologize. That’s not in my vocabulary. Because the last person who apologized to me left me.

I flipped my hair before I cross my arms. "I ain't born to apologize just so yo know." She glared at me, but I just mocked her. "Just pay her. Like you always do. Money works like that to you, isn't it?" Tinalikuran ko na siya.

Narinig ko pa ang out of the world gibberish speech niya pero hindi ko na lang iyon pinansin.

They always has eyes to me. Lahat ng galaw ko alam nila. Atensyon ang gusto ko hindi guwardiya na magbabantay sa bawat galaw ko. Gusto ko rin namang magalit, magtampo, at magtanong – pero sa tuwing gagawin ko iyon mas lumalala lang ang sitwasyon.

Ibinagsak ko ang katawan ko sa aking kama. Nakakapagod maging isang Cassidy. Nakakapagod maging ako.

Lumabas ako ng mansiyon para magpahangin at ikalma ang sarili ko. I don’t wanna stay there, it’s not a home to me. It suffocates me.

I heaved a deep sigh.

“What’s with the deep sigh?”

Mabilis akong nag-angat ng tingin na sana hindi ko na lang ginawa. Hindi ko naiwasang mapairap ng maglakad ito palapit sa akin. Tila ba ang frustration na nararamdaman ko kaniana ay biglang napalitan ng pagkairita.

“What are you doing here?” I asked with my brow arched.

Hindi ko siya nakita ng ilang araw matapos ang pag-uusap naming dalawa. Well, wala rin naman akong pakealam tungkol doon – dahil una sa lahat, he’s not my style.

“Hindi mo ba ako namiss? Ilang araw mo akong hindi nakita.” Napamake face ako dahil sa sinabi niya, hindi lang pala siya mahangin, sobrang kapal din ng mukha niya.

I rolled my eyes. “Why would I miss you? I even don’t know who you are, and I don’t give a damn to your existence.”

Nagpatuloy ako sa pglalakad, ngunit sumunod ito kaagad.

“Moon Dashelle Cassidy. Masungit, mataray, maarte, at mayaman. Doesn’t know the word ‘manners’. Lahat ng gusto nakukuha. She loves to go shopping, spending money is what matters to her the most –“ he wasn’t able to continue what she’s saying when I took away the paper he is reading.

He got to be kidding me.

“Are you a stalker?” I glared at him.

Umiling ito saka bahagyang natawa. “She can get whatever she wants, maliban sa isa...” Bahagya siyang huminto. “Atensyon,” pagkakwa’y dagdag niya.

Mas lalong tumalim ang tingin ko sa kanya. Hindi ko alam kung saan niya nakuha ang mga impormasyon na ito tungkol sa akin, pero I don’t think he has right to mock my feelings.

“Kung atensyon lang naman pala ang gusto mo. Meron ako rito, kung gusto mo ibibigay ko iyon sa iyo, basta pansinin mo lang ako.”

Madali para sa ibang tao na maliitin ang nararamadaman ko, dahil nasanay sila na makita ang masamang ugali ko. Alam ko na maliit lang na bagay ang atensyon na hinihiling ko, ngunit wala sila sa sitwasyon ko, at kahit anong gawin nila hindi nila ako maiintidihan dahil hindi nila nararamdaman ang nararamdaman ko. It doesn’t mean na nakikita nila akong matapang at palaban, hindi ako mahina at nasasaktan – every night, most of the time, I’m beating up myself too.

I scoffed as I stared at him despicably. “Feelings aren’t a toy that you can easily play with, it’s an emotion, Moron.”

Mas lalo akong nagkaroon ng rason para kamuhian siya. How dare he mock my feelings? Hindi niya ako kilala. Wala siyang alam sa kuwento ko. Wala siya sa sitwasyon ko. I’m not a man hater, but I’m starting to hate him.

Muli kong ibinagsak ang katawan ko sa aking kama, nang makuha ng atensyon ko ang phone ko nang tumunog ito. Napairap ako nang makita ang pangalan ni Sunny.

"What do you need?" I dully asked, still laying in my bed. Wala akong balak makipagtalo sa kanya dahil naubos ata ang lakas ko dahil sa sobrang inis na nararamdaman ko sa sleazy creature na iyon.

(I got news!) Sunny exclaimed excitedly. Lagi naman siyang may balita, hindi na ito bago.

Bahagya akong napabangon dahil sa sinabi niya.

"What is it again?" I asked.

I heard her whined. (Chaster Ren is the son of LV Group. ‘Di ba balak mong mag-apply for internships sa LV?)

He is what? Is she serious? LV Group is one of the famous company in the country. They're famous because they build the different famous hotel, restaurants, malls — from the smallest to biggest building and highest structure. LV Group is the dream destination of all Engineering students especially me!

Pinatay ko ang tawag at agad kong sinearch ang pangalan ng sleazy creature. I was dumbfounded when I saw his background. He is indeed a Luivega. But he does’t look decent to be a Luivega. Kaya ba ang lakas ng loob niyang i-mock ang nararamdaman ko, dahil isa pala siyang taga-pagmana? Mariin kong naipikit ang aking mga mata.

"Saan ka pupunta, Senorita?" Hindi ko pinansin si Manang. Mabilis kong tinungo ang bahay nila Clay na nasa tabi lang ng bahay.

I just need to clarify something. Gusto ko lang malaman kung legit ang nabasa ko sa internet.

"Where's Clay?" I asked at the maid who looks puzzled.

"I heard my name — HOLLY!" He screamed shockingly. His hand is in his lips. Gay! "What are you doing here? Akala ko ba hindi ka na muling tatapak sa bahay namin? May speech ka pa nga na 'I SWEAR TO G! I WILL NEVER EVER GONNA ENTER THIS HELL AGAIN!'" Maarteng sabi niya with hand gestures.

Umirap lang ako.

He smiled widely. “ What brought you here anyway? Sasama ka sa District 9? Ey! Ayokong ipagpaalam ka kay Lola." I push him away. I sat down on their sofa with my legs and arms cross.

"I'm not coming. I hate loud places!" I annoyingly stated.

"What is she doing here?" Kuya Jam asked when he suddenly showed up with a beer in can in his hand. "Thought you wouldn't go here again." he said smirking.

Nakita ko ang senyasan nilang dalawa ngunit hindi ko na lang ito pinansin.

"I'm in trouble," I enunciated. They look at me — not surprised! They both laughed. What's wrong with these two?

I always in trouble naman kasi, siguro sanay na sila.

"That's not new. I'm not surprised anymore," Kuya Jam said leaning at the sofa shrugging his head while laughing.

"Napanood ko na iyan bago pa madelete ng kampon ni Lola," Clay plainly said.

I rolled my eyes. "Not about the video. As if I freaking care about that."

They frowned and both sip their beer in can while giving me a not so good stare. I rolled my eyes again.

“So I’ll go straight to the point, you guys are friend with that sleazy guy from Philesthrone U, right? Why didn’t you tell me na he is part of the Luivega’s clan pala? Well, I really don’t care naman sa existence niya, but how’d that happen? He doesn’t look like Luivega.” Clay was about to say something when I cut him off. "I know you too has similarities. Annoying, jerk, asshole, stupid, perv, ugly, and so fort," I enumerated.

He look at me in disbelief while Kuya Jam is dying in happiness.

"That hit my ego, Cous. How could you describe me like that? I'm the hottest you know. The right definition of the word ethereal," he said while his both hands are in his chest. Nandidiri ko siyang tinignan dahil sa sinabi niya.

“Kung interesado ka pala sa akin, bakit hindi ako mismo ang tanungin mo?”

I literally froze when I suddenly saw the sleazy creature. He’s at it again, his infamous smirk that keeps on getting on my nerves. What is he doing here by the way? Hindi ko pinansin ang pagdating at pagbati sa akin ng iba kong pinsan, dahil na kay sleazy guy lang ang mga mata ko.

“O huwag mo akong masyadon titigan, baka mafall ka sa akin hindi kita masasalo,” mayabang na saad niya kaya naman agad akong napairap.

“Conceited. I’m not staring at you, it’s just happened na nasa harapan kita.” Hindi ko lang din maiwasang titigan siya, sa anong dahilan siya naging Luivega? Mukha siyang dugyot.

Umayos ako ng pagkakaupo. He sat down in front of me, then Kuya Jam handed him a beer. They look so literally close.

"Dash, anong sabi ni Lola nang makita niya ang video?" tanong ni Cloud na tumabi sa akin.

"Did that oldy send you to spy me?" I glared at him. Mabilis itong tumanggi, gano’n din ang ginawa ng iba.

Well, I don’t give a damn to it naman, I know oldy will work on it. Money can buy anything though.

"You should apologize," ani Kuya Jam na binalingan ako ng tingin.

Why do they keep on insisting that I should apologize? They don’t know the whole story though.

"Ito? Mag a-apologize? Baka mas mauna pang magunaw ang mundo kesa mag apologize ito." Tinabig ko ang kamay niya nang ituro niya ako.

"Ain't talking to you. Kilala ba kita?" pagtataray ko. Close ba kami ng hambog na mahanging ito? Masyadong papansin! “And why would I apologize?” taas kilay na tanong ko. “As if I did something wrong.” The video was short, hindi nakuha ang lahat ng detalye, kung paano nag-umpisa ang lahat. “That Professor insult me.”

Lahat sila ay napatingin sa akin. Napailing na lang ako

This is how they treat me. Tingin nila lahat ng gawin ko, masama. Makakita lang sila ng ginawa ko na kapuna-puna, they will jump into conclusion again that I did it for fun – ni hindi sila nagtanong sa akin kung ano ba talaga ang nangyari. Kung ano ang nakita nila, iyon na lang ang paniniwalaan nila. Pero nasanay na akong ganito – na ganito nila ako itrato. Sanay na ako, pero aaminin ko hindi ko maiwasang ma-disappoint dahil gano’n lang kadali sa kanila na i-judge ako.

“You should have told me that –“

“For what?” I cut Clay off. “As if something will going change.”

Huminga ako ng malalim, at tumayo. I understand naman na tingin nila sa akin laging gumagawa ng gulo, pero hindi ba pwedeng tanungin muna nila ako? My life is indeed a mess.

Bahagya akong napatingin kay Luivega na matamang nakatingin sa akin. Napangisi at iling na lang din ako.

"Insan, saan ka pupunta?" tanong ni Cloud nang tumayo ako, hindi ko siya pinansin.

Hindi ko na kailangan pang magpaliwanag sa kanila, dahil alam ko rin naman na walang magbabago. Minsan, mas pinipili ko na lang tumahimik instead voicing out what I want to say, but I know that they won’t going to listen anyway.

"Hoy." Napatigil ako sa paglalakad nang may humawak sa braso ko. Marahas kong binawi ang braso ko nang makita kung sino ito.

Him too. Ngayon niya lang ako nakilala pero jinudge na niya ako, paano pa kaya ang mga tong mas matagal ng kilala at nakasama ako? Wala silang pinagkaiba. Sobrang dali lang sa kanila na paniwalaan ang makikita nila kapag ako ang may gawa.

He scratch the back of his head with that infamous smirk of his again.

“Your phone,” he said handing me my phone that I immediately took.

Tinalikuran ko na siya.

"Sus! Sinadya mo atang iwan phone mo para iabot ko personally sa iyo eh. Gusto mo akong masolo 'no?"

Huminto ako sa paglalakad at mariing ipinikit ang aking mga mata.

"Excuse me conceited pathetically idiotic moronic sleazy creature?!" I blustered giving him a warning stare.

Nakapamewang ito gamit ang kaliwa niyang kamay samantalang naglalaro sa labi niya ang isa. Taas baba ang balikat ko dahil sa iritableng nararamdaman ko. I really swear to G! This guy won't last long!

"Sinave ko na rin pala number ko. Para hindi mo na kunin sa mga pinsan mo. Alam ko namang type mo ako!"

What the?! What?! Mabilis kong chineck ang phone ko, and my eyes totally widened with what he saved his name on my contacts! He saved it as 'FUTURE'. He must be crazy!

“Are you nuts? Type? Kita? Dream!" I exclaimed almost out of breath. “And I don’t need your number,” I added as I deleted his number on my contacts. He chuckled.

Muli ko siyang tinalikuran dahil baka tuluyang maubos ang pasensya ko sa kanya at makalimutan kong isa siyang Luivega.

“I’m sorry for what I’ve said.” Bahagya akong napahinto dahil sa sinabi niya. “I judged you without asking and knowing what really happened. Sorry.”

Muli akong napalingon sa kanya. Ngumiti siya sa akin, not an annoying one. Napailing ako saka ko siya muling tinalikuran.

“Moon Dashelle, if someone insult you again, call me and let’s insult that someone together.”

I intently closed my eyes and fake a smile.

He is the first one – backing me up.

----