Waning in desire.

Finally, the summer vacation is over, and It's time to go back to school tomorrow. I am not exactly happy about going to school. I am excited to meet Vian and Jay after the vacation.

We used to spend every vacation together, but this one is different. My Mom opened a new café in London. Finally, she is in good shape after dad left her. She rented a small building near a corporate company for better sales. We live upstairs, and the café is downstairs making it easy for her. The place is nice and cozy except for the constant noise of vehicles and people.

I went to London this vacation to help her with the opening. The sale was good thanks to the nearby company employees. It was a gaming company. People sit in our cafe and discuss their new ideas for games. We offered space for office meetings too and I eavesdrop every single conversation. I didn't understand most of them, but I was always fascinated by the idea of creating games. Vian and Jay love gaming, they kind of influenced me to know more about games. I don't play games except when Vian or Jay force me to do but I always loved the idea of creating a character personalized by me.

My mom wants me to move to London after I finish high school. She already has a college in her mind for me to apply to, but I am not sure. I don't know what Vian and Jay are planning to do. We promised each other that we will be together no matter what for the rest of our lives. I am sure everything will fall into place.

I want to be a teacher so I can imagine myself studying literature and Vian wants to take Horticulture since he wanted to look after his grandparent's farm. Jay wants to join a dance academy and attend auditions. I can picture us together staying in a small apartment doing our own things. I am more excited thinking about building our future together.

Vian went on a tour around Asia with his father. His father wanted him to see all the places where his mom went before he turns eighteen. While touring, Vian sent me a picture of his mom taken in a restaurant when she was traveling. It was interesting how they still had that picture. His mom looked young and happy with a radiant smile in that picture. Vian must have been very happy to see her in that picture.

We've been texting all vacation. I couldn't face-time him since he was on the move almost all the time but he never forgot to send me a picture of beautiful places and sceneries that he has been to. I am so happy to finally see him in the flesh tomorrow after a long time.

Because of us, Jay decided to go see his grandmother who is living in London with his Uncle, her son. He was just one hour away from my place, but we couldn't meet since I was busy with the café opening. But we never forgot to face time each other every night before bed.

His uncle owns a pizza place in London. Jay worked there during his stay. We recite everything that happened during the day with each other at night. Dealing with flirty and aggressive customers drained my energy a lot and talking to Jay was my stress reliever. Even though we haven't met during our vacation, it felt like we have been never apart but we missed Vian a lot.

Jay and me, together we came back from London this morning. He wanted to stay at his home tonight, and I didn't ask him why. He usually stays at mine or at Vian's. He practically acts like he doesn't have parents after they beat him to death when they found out about his secret dance class. Police were involved and they warned his parents. Our principal, Mr.Donan and Mr. Harrison supported him a lot during those days. So I didn't know what was going on in his mind when he said that he wanted to go home but I didn't stop him. As much as we hate his parents for doing this to him, I can understand that he misses them. I just hope that they give him the love he deserves.

My phone starts to ring, and I head to my bed, picking up my phone I saw my mom's name.

"Hey, mom,"

"Hey sweetie, did you reach safely? Why didn't you call me? How's grandma?" she started bombarding me with questions as soon as I pick up the call. She is one of those overprotective nagging mothers.

I rolled my eyes even though she cannot see me. "Of course mom, I am safe. What am I, Ten? Besides Jay was with me, remember? And yeah Grandma's fine." I said a bit annoyed.

"Yeah... yeah, Jay was with you, and that is what I am worried about. I am surprised that I didn't get a call from airport officials about two teenagers going rogue." She said equally annoyed.

"I miss my calm and quiet daughter. What did you do to her?" she sighed.

I couldn't help but laugh. She loves Vian and Jay but sometimes she equally wishes that I didn't befriend them in the first place. Well. Who wouldn't? After I met those two dorks my mom's getting calls from the Principal's office almost every week.

"Mom, I can be calm and quiet even now," I said playfully.

"Yeah...yeah..." I know she is rolling her eyes even without looking at her.

While talking to my Mom, I got a call from Vian in waiting.

"Mom...Mom, I will be fine. I will call you later. Love you."I cut the call before she can say anything back. She was talking about being a good girl and doing academically well this year. I love her so much but she can be a nagging woman.

"Hey V," I said excitedly. I am thrilled to hear his voice after a long time.

"Hey, babe." He said nonchalantly. It's not unusual for him to call me babe. We three call each other 'babe' from time to time. But right now his deep voice did something to my visceral organs.

"Wow... what did you eat in Asia? You sound so sexy." Oh god, that came out so wrong

."...I mean spunky." I tried to smooth it out.

I hear his carefree laugh on the other side which sent tingles all over my body.

"So what's up? How are you?" I changed the subject before he could say something about my embarrassing slip of the tongue.

"I am good. It's so good to hear your voice." He said and that made me smile.

"Me too, babe. So when did you come? You should have told us. I and Jay would have come to see you." I said while rolling on my bed.

"I was so tired due to jet lag. So I went to bed the moment I came home. I am calling you as soon as I wake up. I didn't even brush, promise." That made me laugh also it feels good to know that I was the first person he called.

"Speaking of Jay, where is he? His phone's off." Here I thought he called me first.

"He said he wanted to stay at his place tonight," I said worriedly. The line was quiet for a moment. I don't know what he is thinking.

"V?"

"I will go and check upon him," he said in a firm tone. I can understand that he is worried about him, but I think we need to give him some space.

"I think it's better if we talk to him tomorrow. You know..." I tried to tell him subtly. Again the line went silent for few seconds.

"Yeah, you are right. I am tired anyway. See you at school tomorrow Ava. Bye." He hung up the call saying that.

I couldn't sleep well that night. Lots of thoughts kept me awake. Especially the ones about Vian. I started to have feelings for him the moment I saw him. At first, I thought that it was because he was being nice to me so I thought it would fade away as time goes by. I think it kind of did. Every day when I got close to him as a friend, it felt like it was gone.

when I was with him and Jay I didn't feel anything more than a friend would feel but in the absence of him, I couldn't stop thinking about him. It was like, his presence filled my mind stopping me from thinking about anything else, and his absence filled my mind with his thoughts making me imagine all kinds of things about us.

When I was alone, I reanalyzed every word he said to me that day and smiled to myself like an idiot. I relived every moment of us together and felt every touch of him again and again. But it wasn't like that when I was with him. I didn't feel any butterflies when he held my hand or called me 'babe.' Everything I felt for him was like an after-effect. Fortunately, it helped me to hide my feelings from him and from others.

Even then I thought it was my mind playing tricks. I even studied teenage hormone problems and tried not to take them seriously. But I couldn't stop them no matter how I distracted myself. So after some time, I started to accept it. It was not like I was doing anything wrong, I was just having my own moments of happiness.

After that entire acceptance and some moments of excitement, there comes the fear. I know that if I am not going to put an end to this, then there is a big chance that this might ruin our friendship. I don't know how Vian will react and how Jay will take this. I don't want to lose any of them just because of my petty feelings.

As days went by, I started to get affected even in his presence. But I learned to hide my feelings for Vian and to maintain my composure around him. But today I couldn't hide the excitement in my voice when I talked to him. I am sure he didn't notice anything different.

It was almost time to leave for school. I got up early since I was too excited to go to school today. I combed my long, wavy, black hair into a ponytail. I don't really wear makeup but since I was feeling good I took my eyeliner to wear, making my blue eyes pop. After wearing some lip gloss I looked into the mirror. With a satisfying nod, I walked out of my home.

Usually, we three went to school together. But today we decided to meet at school and I was unusually early for school. I was waiting for them under the same tree where I met V for the first time with a spider in his hand. I felt nostalgic thinking about that moment. I was bubbling over with excitement to meet my best friends.

In few minutes, I spotted Jay at the entrance. He looked sad but his face brightened up the moment he saw me. I ran towards him and hugged him meeting halfway. I was practically hanging on his neck winding my hands together when he picked me up and spun while laughing.

"I missed you," I said burying my face on the crook of his neck.

"I was with you yesterday, Aves." He said like it was an obvious thing while laughing. He knew I hate them calling me Aves, but they did that every time to tease me and then it became my name.

I didn't say anything back. I just stood there hugging him giving all my warmth to him. I know I met him yesterday but I saw his sad face when he entered the school. I am sure that something happened with his parents. I just want to comfort him, and I don't know how to do that except hugging him.

"You are one hell of a friend babe. I am feeling alright now." He said as he heard me with a knowing look. Seeing that look I know that he knows why I am doing this. This is how it is between us. We mostly communicate through telepathy. Some might find it funny or weird. But sometimes we know what the other person is thinking and feeling. It is just what it is, I don't know how to say it otherwise.

I smiled brightly and kissed him on his cheeks before pulling away. He kissed me back and turned around to look hearing our names.

"Jay, Aves." We heard Vian's voice calling for us.

Jay immediately ran to him and gave him a hug. But I couldn't move. It was like I was tied down in one place with a pair of most alluring grey eyes.

With your eyes,

You pull me towards you.

Looking at those eyes,

My heart races to you,

You are the silver moon,

But I wane in desire.

You are near but also far.

I will follow you like a shadow forever

And move on like a railroad without touching.

While walking beside you,

I drench even without rain.

This is a colorful poem called love,

Written by my eyes.

This is a story that is unsaid

To anyone until now.

Please vote if you like my story. Let me know your thoughts about this chapter in the comments section.

I hope you enjoy reading -T