All Chapters of Protecting My Heart: Chapter 1 - Chapter 10
78 Chapters
1. Sideways
Finn had seen this woman around town for the last three years and never had the courage to speak with her until today, when he finally didn't have a choice.  He didn't have a freakin' choice!  Fate made sure of that.   There was something about her that terrified Finn although it was extremely allusive.  Maybe it was her mannerisms; standoffish, cool, aloof.   Maybe it was her beauty; her freckled cheeks that blush so easily, her smile or her gorgeous wavy red hair.  No! It was her eyes that bore into his soul and were constantly saying, 'Stay away!' None of that mattered now!  None of it! He needed to focus on her and not his rejected or hurt feelings.  He was not the type of man to leave someone in need because his ego had been bashed or bruised.  He let out a deep breath, that he didn't realize he was holding, as he assessed the situation.   Her black SUV was sideways in the middle of the road.
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2. Shattered Glass
Metal crushed into metal and the sound echoed through Hal's brain.  He backed his truck away from her smashed vehicle and drove away as quickly as he could.  His work was done here, certain that the crash killed Lili.  He was elated as she would never again mess up his plans.  There was no morality left in Hal's tortured soul as he briefly thought, 'I will miss the sex but not the bitch!' The bitch was dead! He was gloating in his own glory, never thinking that he was too far gone.  He was unaware that he was the one that was broken and not Lili.   His heart had been consumed by evil and he was lost to the world.   As he raced down the road, the decided to listen to the police radio.  He wanted to hear that Lili James Maloney was dead from injuries sustained in a hit and run accident.   Oh, how he was waiting.  It took about ten minutes for the cal
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3. It’s in the Waiting
Finn felt the anger building inside of him.   He wanted revenge and it didn't matter that Hal was dead. Someone else was going to have to pay for his sins. Who should he go after for killing Jude? and Lili! She was brutally violated and someone would pay! Oh someone would pay... Shaking his shoulder gently, Billy woke Finn saying, "Hey man!  Wake up!" Finn looked around and was disoriented.  Where was he? Rubbing his eyes he looked at Billy for a few seconds until the trauma of the day hit him like a ton of bricks.   Billy continued, "Come on, man.  You're being discharged so you can get up and get dressed.  You're clothes are in your bag along with your keys to the apartment." Finn was still groggy from his nightmare sleep and he was still trying to register where he was and then looked at Billy again before he grunted.  He swung his legs over the side of the
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4. Stay With Me
Let go Finn! —-  Let go!Come!—-    Follow me!Remember who you used to be!  Come Finn!  You know you want it!Just one more time! What's the harm?Finn tried to escape his nightmare, clawing and screaming.  He was reduced to begging, "Please let me go! Release me.  This is not my life anymore.  I want to live!"The nightmare continued down a darker path.    He could smell the alcohol and saw the lines of powder everywhere.  Calling him.  Pulling him in.  It felt too real. He was drowning in his own tears and was sucked down another black hole and was slammed against a wall.  A strong arm pinned him to the wall and he felt tremendous pain as glass shards attacked every inch of his exposed body.  Screaming in pain and weak from the frenzy of the dream, he woke up curled in a ball on the floor in Lili's intensi
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5. The Gift of Time
Elle just started her shift and was making her way around the floor to catch up on her patients when she saw Finn walk up to her with his duffel bag."Mr. Finnegan are you leaving?" Elle asked."No, but I was hoping you would let me into the family shower room so that I can shower and shave." he replied.Elle pulled out her keys and smiled at him saying, "Sure, right this way.  While you are in there, I will make sure to keep two eyes on Lili for you."He let a small smile flicker across his face before saying, "Much appreciated." He closed the door and showered as quickly as humanly possible.   He was thankful that Billy took him several outfits and he wondered when he would have to give in and go home to get more clothes. He dreaded that thought of leaving her for a few hours.  Walking back to the room, he saw Billy standing outside waiting patiently for him. "Billy, what's up?" Finn asked.Billy took off his h
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6. Hours Turn to Days
Ten days later  Finn was exhausted as he walked into Lili's room and took off his suit jacket and started to undo his tie.  He cursed under his breath at Hal and his violent tirade.  How could anyone impart such vindictiveness to a beautiful creature like Lili? And to kill Jude!  What was his reason?  He was in mourning for Jude.  He was such a good friend, quiet, trustworthy and loyal.  He was one of the first to connect with Finn when he stumbled across this small town, out of sorts, lost with the need to be found.   Jude met him where he was; broken and lost.  He was a faithful friend and never judged his past. He was the one that suggested that Finn stay for a few months and he would introduce him to Russel over at the ranch, recommending that he should work for the summer as a ranch hand.  That job turned into his current security position and taught him the value of hard work and honesty. &n
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7. First Words Spoken
Finn kept rubbing her hand and whispering encouragements to her as she started to stir.  He looked at Dr. Berkeley for affirmation that things were moving in the right direction and he gave Finn a thumbs up. Elle walked in and stood in the doorway, monitoring her progress.  The monitors were showing increased activity and her eye movements were increasing.  Finally, Lili let out a groan and twisted a bit in bed.  She was still sound asleep but Finn was ecstatic, smiling ear to ear. Leaning over Lili, Dr. Berkeley checked her heart and stepped back, pleased with her progress so far.  More restlessness and another groan.  Her eyelids fluttered and almost opened before she settled in again.   Her covers had come undone so Finn straightened them out and pushed her unruly hair out of the way.  Just as he was sitting back down he heard, "Finn, Finn, where am I?" "Lili, oh my Lili.  You're in the hospital.  D
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8. Somethings Are Better Left Unspoken
You're safe now.  You're safe now.   His words swirled around her head as she continued to hold his hand.  Lili thought, 'How could I be safe?'  Even with Hal dead, she was traumatized by the abuse over the last three years.  It could take a lifetime to overcome.   Lili looked into Finn's eyes and politely smiled and patted his hand condescendingly and said, "I don't think that I'll ever feel safe with any man, even you, but I need to trust someone." She watched as Finn hung his head down and his forehead rested on her hands and she heard him whisper, "Please, Lili.  Please give me a chance to take care of you.  I will do my best to nurse you back to health." She remained silent and pulled her hand away from him.  Truth be told… his touch terrified her because she trusted him.  Why? There was no explanation, but she trusted him.  She closed her eyes and started to cry.  The tears flowed s
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9. The Power of Words
Several nurses rushed to Finn's side and one of them managed to revive him.  After an initial screening he was whisked in a wheelchair down to the ER and they insisted on doing a full work up on him.He protested that he was fine and was just tired and hungry.   Doctor Hill finally agreed that Finn was alright but insisted that he have a full meal and a few hours sleep before he would release Finn to care for Lili.When Doctor Hill left and he was alone, Finn mumbled, "It's okay doc! It's ok.  I am checking out and going back to Philadelphia.  I know when I am not wanted."He barely managed to speak the words as sleep took over his exhausted brain.  Finn slept for seven hours and no one in the hospital dared interrupt his sleep.  Finn was unaware of his newfound reputation; local hero.  He had avoided the newspapers and the gossip stories that they wrote about Finn and his drug addicted past and his new life. &nbs
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10. Next Steps
Finn watched as Lili was getting restless sitting in bed.  She was squirming and had yanked the sheets out and was making a mess.  She whined, "I need to walk.  "Elle is coming in a few minutes and she will show me how to properly help you out of bed and hold you as you walk. Be patient, my sweet." Finn said as he tried to calm her down."At least help me swing my legs over the side of the bed," she begged.  He looked her in the eyes and in a dramatic fashion rolled his eyes and fluttered his long eyelashes at her.  She laughed at his silliness and said, "Finn, I am glad we worked things out.""Hmmm, me too," he mumbled as he kissed her forehead.  Finally, he decided to help her swing her legs over the edge of the bed for the first time and he couldn't stop smiling when he saw the look of excitement on her sweet face.  Just then, Elle walked in and asked, "What are you two up to?
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