Lahat ng Kabanata ng Kiss For The Sin: Kabanata 181 - Kabanata 190

"Father cannot always defend you to the council, Hera. It may be sound as if I am forcing you but you need to finish this mission. Do not fail it" he said, voice that weigh so much emotion opposite to his serious face. I am force to do something even if I was not told to. It feels as if there is an invisible hand that push me to do things that I am hesitant to commit. Even without words, no command, on the back of my head I am force to things, to act with initiative. "I know what's my role in this family and what is my responsibility in the organization, Jaxer" I pause and took a deep breath. "I have to listen and be obedient even if that kills me inside. Even if I had to ignore my own emotion, what matters is to always get the work done without a mistake" A single tear escape my eyes followed by the strong blows of the wind. I am not sure if Jaxer saw it but one thing is for sure, he is aware that I am struggling right now. There is a silent dilemma inside me and my hesitation is

"What are you trying to say?" I hissed, eyes are burning with rage. I could feel my blood boiling as I look at him sharply with fisted hand. If I just had a gun right now, for sure the barrel is already on his head. If looks could kill, Sain Czar Ildefonso is probably dead by now. The expression of his face remain while looking at me intently. He is not bothered how I look at him flaunting my anger. Although I see no emotion in his deep drowning eyes, I know on the back of his head, a lot of thoughts is bothering him. Sain always maintain his composure but that doesn't mean he doesn't losses his temper. He's just good at hiding his real emotion. He's difficult to read, he's not easy to predict. He is mysterious as his name. "I am just simply stating what I know, woman" he reply in a straight tone as his eyes carefully trail to my neck down to my expose shoulders and arms. Does he know something? Or he is trying to know something from me that's why he's doing this. Provoking me.

"Do you really want to kill me?" I stilled on my spot as he look at me straight to my eyes. His dark soulful eyes holds so much emotion, the intensity of his gaze makes me feel as if he could see what's on my mind. But despite with that, his tone is challenging as if he's provoking me to say something that I will make him believe. My lips move but surprisingly, there's no voice came out. There is a sudden lump on my throat giving me difficulties to breath in I don't know the reason. One thing is for sure, I am having a hard time to answer Sain Czar as if it was the most difficult question that I have ever encounter. "I am asking you, woman" he hissed. "Do you really intend to kill?" His voice is demanding and the strong presence he exude suddenly makes me feel small. For the first time, I feel intimidated with him and all I wanted to do right now is to step back and run away. Why? What's with me? Was my mind already sided to Sain Czar but I am just being in denial? Did I really

"Ah, so she's that girl"I couldn't help to frown because I don't understand what does he mean by it. I lift my gaze to look at Jaxer but he's looking at Teofilo with his stoic face as if he could understand what does this old man trying to say."I never thought Luscio could raise her well" Teofilo added that made me shift back my gaze at him.Jaxer's grip on my arm tighten but with a full control not to hurt me. I attempt to utter a word but Jaxer cut me off by pulling me behind him."Don't mess up with her, you know how much Dad treasure his daughter" I gulp. It was like a instinctive response when I heard the dangerous tone of Jaxer that indicates warning to Teofilo. I don't know what is happening but one thing is for sure, my brother is not pleased with what Teofilo said. It feels as if he knew something, they both knew something that I didn't.The creased on my forehead deepen when I heard a laugh from Teofilo and then he tap Jaxer's shoulder. "Easy young man, I'm not doing any

"W-What do you mean by that?" I stuttered, couldn't seem to understand what does he mean.That fucking man killed my entire family how am I not allowed to kill him? A lot of people die in my hands, they are not innocent but I do not have any business with them aside from the fact that I was order to assassinate them. There's no way that man can escape his death when he has a debt to pay from me. "I cannot tell you his name. You're my daughter, and you're not allowed to kill him" he answer that made me look at him in disbelief.I scoff and frustratingly pulled my hair shutting my eyes close before shifting back my gaze at him."Really? You're telling that to me after he fucking killed my family?!" My voice sound taunting but I don't care. I already lost the last string of my trust towards him including the respect. I felt betrayed, I look like a fool calling him my father not knowing that he is the accomplice of the man who killed my family. I felt so messed up right now, and I don'