Happiness Takes Time

Once again while sitting in class I could see that everyone was looking at the bruises on my arms. I tried to hide them, but Carl hasn't exactly been making it easy for me to hide them like he did in the beginning. I don't believe that I could still call him my stepdad because of what he was doing to me. He isn't worth the word dad at all anymore. 

He had been beating me since I turned six. I can't remember much from before and the only thing that is still really vivid is the day mum told me that dad had died sometime after my birth. I can't even remember how he looks like anymore. Mum and Carl threw away or hid all the pictures or something because there isn't any around the house. I wouldn't dare ask about one again as that didn't go well with Carl. 

The only thing that I have that is remotely linked to dad is the dear John letter that was sent to mum when dad had went missing from his platoon and was assumed dead when he didn't show up in the following three days and was nowhere to be found. 

Mum met Carl when I was age two just after dad was gone apparently. They got married when I was age four. I remember because they made sure to buy me a little cute dress and made me up like a pretty doll. This was well before he had turned on me. We used to be the perfect family and go out on family trips and ice-cream trips. This all ended when I turned six. This is when he started beating me in private but berating me in public whenever my mum was not around. 

He hasn't stopped. I'm currently seventeen, turning eighteen in three months. I can't wait because then I can go away from them, and they won't have a foot to stand on when they try and get me back like last time. I don't care if I have to live on the streets until I'm on my feet as long as I just got away from him. 

After school I got home and went straight to my room to try and avoid him. Unfortunately I didn't have a lock in my door anymore because I had used it once. Carl removed it afterwards and I had to spend a week in ICU which earned me just more punishments as I had cost them "additional money". 

I could only close the door for a little freedom at this point. I had just started getting my books out of my backpack to try and do my homework as soon as possible, before I might not be able to do it later, when I heard footsteps approaching my room. Footsteps could and would most probably mean Carl and more hurt coming my way. 

Hiding away doesn't help and only makes it worse because then he would just be more mad having had his anger fuelled and that would mean just a harsher and longer beating. I stayed after school once wanting to just finish a project due in the library and forgot to let them know. When I got home all hell had broken out and I remember that I couldn't sit down for the first two weeks after this. He had tested out his new golf set. 

Luckily the footsteps moved past my door so I knew that I was safe for at least the time being and that I could quickly try and get this homework done. Might not be able to hand it in on time but at least I would have it done and get it in sometime for at least some marks and credits. 

I always wonder whether mum knows and just looks past it so she doesn't get the same treatment or if she really doesn't know and is not observant enough to see me struggling to walk, sit or whatever after a beating. 

She never asked about what had happened so either she knew and did nothing in regard to it or Carl had told her a fable of a story of what had happened to me. At least in this way I didn't have to think of any excuses anymore because I honestly don't have any more after having used all the obvious ones at school and with Kyle. I doubt they are needed with Kyle as he sort of figured everything out on his own accord. 

It was him and his parents that helped me escape the first time and helped me get out of the house. I was grateful even though it had ended up not working and only making Carl even more mad than he was before. They feel bad but whenever I am with them, I tell them that they couldn't have known and now we know and we won't try it again until he has no legal foot to stand on. 

They really have been nothing but good to me. He sneaks me some food whenever Carl has me on an eating strike and makes sure that whenever his clothes are too small that they are passed to me so at least I have somethings to wear because if it was up to Carl, I wouldn't have anything. 

It was a lot later that evening when I heard more footsteps coming to my room again. I was already bathed and dressed ready for bed and contemplated "being asleep" but decided against that and went to open the door. 

I opened and there stood mum full blown in tears clutching what looked to be a letter and an envelope in her hands. She was in such a state where she couldn't even tell me what the matter was so I took the letter from her hand and started reading the words that had made her so upset that she couldn't even tell me what was going on.

Dear Rose 

I have been held captive by enemy forces. My fellow troops have rescued me, and I have been recuperating in the army hospital. I'm coming home soon. I can't wait to see you and our little girl. I know that this may come as a shock to you as you would have gotten a dear john but please I am not dead, and I am returning to you both as soon as possible. 

Love 

Your Jacob

Jacob? But that was dad's name.