Goddess Face Slapping Short Stories & Novels

When the wedding invitation from my high school classmate Ella Reese arrived, a video of her and her friends shoving the two-hundred-pound girl I used to be into a mud pit was already going viral. Her caption read, "Those were the days. Sophie Aubert, you absolutely have to be my bridesmaid." Our former classmates flooded the comments with jeers. "Ella's so generous. She'd actually invite a plagiarist? Will Sophie even fit into a bridesmaid dress? Making one for her would take enough fabric for three people." "It's been seven years. By now, they'd probably need a crane just to get her into the venue!" "Didn't she write Jack a love letter back then? He'll probably be so scared he'll cry." The groom, Jack Smith, replied in the comments, "If she actually has the nerve to show up, I'll dance with her in front of everyone. Call it an apology for throwing her into the fountain back then." The comment section exploded with people cheering him on. I calmly took a sip of unsweetened black coffee. They thought I was still the fat girl with no choice but to hide in a corner and cry. They had no idea I was now a fitness influencer with millions of followers, much less that the luxury estate they had rented for the wedding belonged to me. I replied in the comments, "No need for a bridesmaid dress. I'll be there on time." This time, I would tear down her perfect facade myself and give Ella a wedding she would never forget.

I dragged my pack from the old ways to thrive in the human world. As its Alpha, I canceled our most pointless tradition: the annual Winter Solstice Moonflower ornaments. But Chloe, a new omega, put me on blast on our pack’s feed for it. She said I disrespected the Moon Goddess. That I spat on tradition. Contracts from other packs and human companies started drying up. Even my own pack turned on me. So I took away the ten-grand Winter Solstice bonus…and gave them twenty-eight-dollar Moonflower ornaments instead. Now, my pack is losing their minds. Crying. Begging for the ten grand back.

I am the daughter of Zeus. To experience mortal love, I sneaked down to the mortal realm. Hiding my true identity, I met Kaelen, King of Mycenae, and became his queen. Just as I was drowning in my newfound happiness, my divine handmaid, Lyra, found me. Tearfully, she claimed she feared for my safety and begged to stay by my side to serve me. In my past life, I believed her lies. I kept her around, even sharing my jewels and finest gowns with her. But behind my back, she seduced Kaelen and climbed into his bed. Worse still, Lyra stole my identity as a goddess. She convinced Kaelen that I was a curse who would bring doom to the entire kingdom. Kaelen believed her. With cold, ruthless eyes, he looked at me and said, "Valentina, I am sorry. But for the sake of the kingdom, I must do this." Lyra leaned in and whispered maliciously into my ear, "Never thought a high-and-mighty goddess like you would end up under my heel, did you?" They bound me to a wooden cross and set me ablaze. Until my very last breath, my rage burned hotter than the flames consuming my flesh. When I opened my eyes again, I was back on the very day Lyra begged me to take her in.

On the very first day of college, I became Kingsley University's infamous jerk magnet. It didn't matter whether it was the polished upperclassman everyone adored or the rebellious campus bad boy; any guy who went on even one date with me would dump me the very next day for my roommate, Lucinda Lane. Lucinda quickly became the untouchable dream girl every elite guy was obsessed with, effortlessly managing her ever-growing roster of admirers. She'd hand me another carefully curated list of perfect dating prospects every single day. "Girl, don't be afraid of getting hurt. There's always a better one waiting. You have to be brave enough to chase true love." I believed her. So, I kept going after the next guy. This time, I had gotten a sweet younger student with puppy-dog charm. Then, he dumped me, too. For Lucinda. Just when I was at my lowest, a stream of floating comments suddenly appeared in front of my eyes. "The heroine is incredible. She's stolen so many men already! I've hated that evil supporting girl forever. Why does some country bumpkin get to have all these guys falling for her?" "I wish I had the heroine's Affection Transfer System. That way, my ex wouldn't have been stolen by that woman." "I can't wait to see what the next male lead is like. I'm literally just sitting here and waiting for her to steal another man." That was when it finally clicked. I'd been working unpaid as stocking labor for her dating pool this whole time.

On their wedding day, my father, Cassian Varen, swore by the River Styx, "I will cherish my wife and ensure that her bloodline flourishes under my protection." Yet my mother, Thea Theron, miscarried five times in a row. And I was the unlucky soul who had tried to be born all five times. In the Asphodel Meadows, I lay in my swaddling clothes and wailed. My cries rang through the Underworld for seven days and seven nights. At last, Hades, Lord of the Underworld, couldn't take it anymore. He rubbed his brow and told the goddess Hecate, "Make sure she's born safely on her sixth try." So Hecate created a soul-link between my mother and me. I thought I'd finally make it this time! But when I opened my eyes, my father was carrying another baby toward my mother. "Darling, meet our first son." Meanwhile, I lay in a wicker basket, about to be carried away and thrown out. Frantic, I screamed in my head. Mom! Another woman had that baby! Your real daughter is right here. Save me! My mother was just starting to smile when her whole body went rigid.

After the socialite heiress gets dumped by a poor student named Andrew Stephens, she goes completely mute. Her mother, Nora Booker, announces that whoever gets her daughter to speak again will be given a million dollars. I make my way through all the men trying to get through to her and say, "Wasn't it just last night that you were calling me 'Daddy' in bed?" "That didn't happen!" Alicia Ellison blurts out. Nora wires me a million dollars on the spot. Over the moon, I follow Alicia around every day, teasing her while making a killing. She can't talk back and can't hit me, so out of frustration, she shuts me up with her own mouth. Overnight, I go from the heiress' personal companion to the heiress' official boyfriend. Every time I crack a dirty joke, she makes sure to get back at me until I don't have the nerve to say it again. Right before our wedding, her first love comes back after life gives him a serious beating. That night, Alicia doesn't come home. Grabbing the remaining half box of condoms and the savings I've accumulated over the past ten years, I walk out of our home. After delivering the condoms to them, I use my savings to buy myself a plane ticket back home.

Our city-state is a thousand miles from Mount Olympus. But we have a custom. One that can never be broken. Every girl about to be married… her fiancé must enter the Temple of Hera. Led by her father. To ask for the goddess’s blessing. If he walks out unharmed, it means the gods approve. A lifetime of happiness. At twenty, my two younger sisters wore their bridal crowns. They married the knights of their dreams. But I'm thirty. And still unmarried. Because every fiancé who enters that temple… breaks our engagement the moment he comes out. They even draw their swords. They try to kill me. My newest fiancé was a noble knight from the capital. He scoffed at the superstitions of our remote city. He insisted on going in. My father, the High Priest, led him into the temple. But when he walked out… his eyes were completely gone. He tackled me. His hands crushed my throat. I don't understand. What is hidden inside the sacred Temple of Hera? What could corrupt a noble soul in an instant? My father knows. He knows every man who goes in will want me dead. So why does he keep leading them into that temple?