Best Your Mom Jokes

My mom is a pathological liar who enjoys making herself seem like the victim. Unfortunately, I'm always the scapegoat. When I was little, there was one time when she went out to play poker with her friends. As a result, she forgot to go home and prepare dinner on time. After that, she slapped me in front of the entire family. "This brat ran off to god knows where earlier! I went out looking for her, which is why dinner got delayed!" Because of that lie, I had to kneel in the courtyard throughout the night. When I was studying, I had to take an extremely important exam. My teacher repeatedly reminded the parents to prepare all materials required for their children. But my mom didn't even prepare anything for me. After that, she even said in front of everyone, "I've already prepared the materials for her. She was the one who threw them away when she was on her way to school because she didn't want to take the exam at all!" Since then, all of my classmates ostracized me throughout my entire school life. After I came of age, my mom kept crying to me in the middle of the night. "Your father has been abusing me for so many years. I had to endure everything for your sake, you know!" I advised her to get a divorce, only for her to tell an exaggerated version of what I said to my father. "Your daughter egged me on to divorce you! She said she doesn't need a useless father like you! I couldn't stand it anymore, so I'm telling you this!" He flew into a fit of rage on the spot, which led to him accidentally pushing me down the stairs. I died on the spot from the fall. When I open my eyes again, I've returned to the day my mom cries to me about my dad for the first time.

Abandoned in the pouring rain, Aleira Tan was left to pick up the broken pieces of her life while carrying her unborn child. For five years, she endured heartbreak, judgment, and the struggles of single motherhood—until a mysterious man once held an umbrella over her head and vanished into the night. She never expected to see him again. Now desperate for a fresh start, Aleira applies for a job at Montenegro Group—one of the country’s most elite companies. But nothing prepares her for the shock of discovering that her new boss is none other than him—Brent Montenegro. The cold, powerful billionaire who pretends not to recognize her… but whose eyes betray a different story. Strict. Mysterious. Untouchable. Brent hires her without explanation, keeping his distance—but always watching. Their unspoken tension grows with every encounter, and soon, secrets from their past begin to surface. Behind Brent’s icy exterior lies a man fighting his own battles—and Aleira might just be the light he never knew he needed. But can a billionaire torn between family expectations and buried emotions fall for a struggling single mom? In a world full of secrets, status, and silent stares… Will love find a way to rewrite their fate?

In the shattered remains of a divided world, Rivermirror stands as a city of shadows—ruled by chaos, secrets, and ruthless ambition. Among its broken streets and hidden corners, two lives converge: Hound, a mercenary cursed by visions of fractured futures, and Argent, a deadly assassin whose silver-braided hair slices through enemies as easily as her carefully crafted lies. Bound by a soul brand, their uneasy alliance thrusts them into a heist that ignites a chain of betrayal, war, and unimaginable consequences. When a daring raid on River's military vault unearths a dark attribute symbiote and a mysterious core relay, the balance of power between two fractured nations is forever altered. As commanders plot revenge, and Rivermirror’s elites spin their webs of deceit, Hound and Argent must navigate a labyrinth of loyalty, survival, and ambition. But trust is a luxury in a city where betrayal is currency, and every choice pushes them closer to a future neither can fully control. With the line between villain and hero blurred, how far will they go to escape their fates? And what price are they willing to pay to survive in a world where hope is as fleeting as shadows? Dark, gripping, and unapologetically raw, Deep Down Your Black Heart is a dystopian fantasy that delves into the depths of ambition, morality, and the haunting weight of choices.

Synopsis "Baby girl, you know there’s no going back after this, right?" he said, licking her lower lip and holding her head up. "If I fuck you right now," he said again, "that means you’ll be mine alone, and no one else is allowed to touch you. I’m the only one who gets to touch you like this." He said, spreading her thighs with his knee. She swallowed hard and looked at him. She was really doing this. She was a grown woman, and she was about to fuck the man who used to be her best friend. She wanted this so badly. She’d never wanted someone like this before. She regretted lying to him years ago—if she had given him a chance back then, she would have been enjoying this all along. "Do you want this, Claire Ema Carter?" he asked, staring at her juicy lips. "Yes, please… I want this." He smirked and licked her ear. "Fucking great," he murmured, before crashing his lips onto hers. --- He never saw her as just a friend from the start—she was always his woman, even if she didn’t know it. He had loved her for a long time. All he ever wanted was to own her, to be the only man she could see and love. But it took her years to realize how much she meant to him.

After watching her father mistreat her mother when she was younger, Ophelia promised that she would not to fall for any man. She would keep her heart to herself. But Jeremy Maxwell weaved his way into her pure heart with a lot of promises and shattered it by cheating on her. Left heartbroken, Ophelia started to think that ALL MEN ARE THE SAME. Well, that didn’t last for long as she met Demetrius Valecian. He was a famous, cold and wealthy billionaire in Texas who had a crazy distaste for ladies after what his ex-girlfriend did to him. Their meeting was bumpy and she ended up annoying Demetrius. Typical, right. Some months later, life pushes her into a situation where she had to seek a job at his company. How would she react when she find out that the person she had insulted a few months ago, was going to be her boss? What did Demetrius have in store for her? And why did he keep intimidating her with an evil smirk whenever he saw her? He was not going to let her off the hook. There was no doubt about that.

I was about to get married to the leader of ‘Decease’, the heftiest mafia gang of Albania next week. Nonetheless, things up when I ended up having a one-night-stand with a stranger just a night before my engagement. No! It wasn’t the worst thing that ever happened with me. It shuddered me from the core when I witnessed my would-be husband in the ceremony. Yes. He turned out to be the one I slept with. “I don’t wanna get married to a girl who sleeps with guys a night before her engagement,” that’s what he said to my grandfather. ~~~~ “Be my submissive,” a month later I offered him and he shook his head in agreement, unable to reject it. ~ The only thing Abraham Harris never wanted was to fall in love with Amayra. The only thing Amayra Mehta wanted was to destroy Abraham beyond repair. Will they ever succeed or destiny will play its role against their goal?

Minahal ni Samantha si Rex simula bata pa lamang siya. Hindi niya alintana ang malaking agwat ng kanilang edad pero may mahal na siya. After 10 years bumalik siya para sakanyang pamilya ngunit pati ang kanyang pag - ibig sakanya ay muling mabubuhay. Ang kanilang one - night - stand ay magbubunga pero sa kagustuhan niyang itago ito ay makakagawa siya ng bagay na pagsisihan niya. After 4 years muli siyang bumalik para kunin ang kanyang pag - aari ngunit ito ay pag - aari na ng iba. Papano niya itatama ang isang pagkakamali kung siya ang unang taong nakalimutan niya? May pag - asa pa bang maging kanya ang puso nitong kahit kailan ay hindi niya makuha - kuha?

Not everyone dream of falling hopelessly in love with a bad boy, yet we all face an inescapable destiny. Jane Smith was no exception… Meeting James Watson was both the happiness moment of her life and the path leading to hell. With him surrounded by countless women, she could no longer bear the pain of constant betrayal and deceit. So with a heavy heart she was forced to bring their relationship to a bitter end… hoping to move on peacefully… but her reality would later become a living nightmare. Two years after parting ways, he suddenly returned to state his claim… this time reluctant to let her go. He could care less whether or not she would agree to be his. "You either move into my place or I’ll move into yours… it’s up to you?" He declared arrogantly. When they saw each other again, this was the first thing he said to her.

Pierre Delacroix was once the powerful CEO of the Delacroix empire. But when a rather brutal attack left him with one blind eye and a weak heart, he is forced into an arranged marriage with Kate Beaumont to protect his family's reputation. Kate Beaumont who is a rising fashion designer however hides a secret from Pierre who does not know that Kate is the woman from one of his many one night stand that he has spent time trying to find. As Pierre faces several enemies who are determined to destroy him, Kate works in secret to keep him alive while betrayals, hidden truths and other deadly conspiracies also come to light. Now will Pierre and Kate face their unintentional pasts. And can their love survive the coming chaos?

Six years ago, Tara was abruptly dumped by the man she loved—Kade. Soon after, she discovered she was pregnant and gave birth to a daughter, Abby. Now a single mother, Tara is desperate to save her sick child. When Abby develops a mysterious illness no doctor can explain, Tara moves to a new city in search of treatment—only to meet Soren Hawthorne, a powerful man who unexpectedly offers her help. Life finally seems to turn in her favor… Until the truth comes out. Abby is a half-wolf. Soren is an Alpha werewolf. And Tara is his fated mate—a human he can never accept as his Luna. Worst of all? Kade, the man who abandoned her, is Soren’s best friend. Fate has returned—and this time, it won’t let her go.