Dirty Mind Quotes Funny Novels & Stories

Midnight. I heard a faint meowing through the window. I was about to have a look when floating words appeared in front of me. [Don't open the window! There isn't a cat outside! It's a serial killer!] [I'm done. How could the side character be so dumb? I can already imagine how tragic her death will be.] [Go and find the villain! He loves you so much! He will surely protect you!] I quickly retracted my hand on the window latch…

After my younger brother died, my parents and grandfather all killed themselves. Each of them died in a different way, but they shared one thing in common: Before their deaths, every one of them had read my brother's suicide note. And in that note, there was only a single sentence. Reporters fought for a chance to interview me. The police interrogated me overnight. Countless people wanted to know what that sentence said. But I never told anyone. Until the tenth anniversary of my brother's death, when I saw a figure standing in front of his grave. At that moment, I felt an overwhelming sense of excitement. Because I knew my turn had finally come.

My wolf awakened on my eighteenth birthday. Soon after, the Feral Curse tore through the werewolf world. The curse nearly claimed me, but a young Alpha, Lachlan, saved my life. He brought me to his pack. His parents, the Alpha and Luna, took me in. They gave me the best room in the pack house and treated me like the daughter they never had. Lachlan never left my side. He risked catching the curse himself, patiently feeding me potions one sip at a time. His wolf knew. I was his fated mate. I was the envy of the pack. I had an Alpha's total devotion. Then one day, Lachlan knelt before me. In his hands was the Moonstone necklace—the symbol of every Luna who came before me. He held me tight, whispering a promise to show the world that I belonged to him, and him alone. I accepted the necklace. But that night, I twisted his love into a poison. A poison I used to murder his parents and eighteen of their loyal retainers.

On the day we're supposed to fill in our future universities, my childhood friend, Emma Slater, who's smart enough to attend a first-rate university, doesn't hesitate to fill a community university as the university she wants to attend the most. All of our classmates are stunned, to say the least. They quickly tell me to stop Emma from submitting that form. But I just smile at them faintly. "It's fine. I completely respect Emma's wishes." No one knows that I've been reborn. In my previous life, Ezekiel Smith, the low income student who had transferred into our class, claimed that he was a transmigrator who was here to save Emma. If both of them couldn't get into the same university, he'd get eradicated by the system. Emma kept obeying Ezekiel's every command, as though she was under his spell. I didn't have the heart to see her give up on her future, so I exposed Ezekiel's lies on the spot. At the same time, I managed to switch Emma's future university back to Kingswell University and Bellsgrave University right before the due date was up. While Emma did get to study at a prestigious university with me, Ezekiel ended up jumping off a building at the third-rate university. In his suicide note, he kept pointing fingers at me and claiming that I was the reason he failed his conquest, which led to his eradication. Because of that, Emma hated my guts to the point that she pushed me off the campus' rooftop, resulting in my own death. Now that I've gotten reborn again, I just want to watch Emma fall into the abyss.

On the seventh day after my daughter goes missing, I kidnap an entire kindergarten. I lock away all 27 students and two teachers in a classroom. I tell the police that if they can't find my daughter, I will kill a kid every 30 minutes. The principal falls to her knees, wailing and begging, "It's not my fault that your daughter is missing. Why should other children pay for it?" I glance at my watch. "29 minutes left. Find her." I know she's in this kindergarten.

After getting drunk with my best friend, Lyla Smith, at the bar, I end up sleeping with my fiance, Silas Clarke, whom I've only met for a few times. Not only that, but I only discover that I'm pregnant with his child two months later. Just when I'm debating whether or not I should tell Silas the truth, Lyla, who has been my friend since we were kids, keep advising me. "You never liked Mr. Clarke anyway, Elara. You might as well use this opportunity to screw this engagement over. "Since you and Logan like each other, he won't mind the fact that you're pregnant with Mr. Clarke's child. He'll definitely treat you and the child well. "When the time comes, you won't have to marry the man you don't like. Plus, you'll marry Logan, the man you love! Isn't this a dream come true?" Just as I'm about to agree to that suggestion, I feel a kick coming from my belly, which has yet to develop a baby bump. Next, a baby's voice echoes in my mind. "Mom, don't trust that mean woman! You'll get abused by that Logan jerk in the future, not to mention you'll be forced to sell your body because of the decision you'll make today! "Dad has already found out that you're the woman from that night! He's on the way here right now!" Upon hearing my unborn baby's thoughts, I tremble violently immediately. Although I don't have any feelings for Silas, I can still try to nurture a relationship with him. On the other hand, I only get to live once, so I can't ruin it no matter what!

Her aunt sold her at eighteen… to a ruthless billionaire, Thomas Brooks, to save her dying brother. She lost her baby, her name, and three years of her life to a monster who treated her like she was nothing but a worthless possession bought with money. And on the night she finally broke free from him, she fell into the arms of the one man she was never meant to touch… her stepson, George. One night of reckless, forbidden passion gave her a child she kept a secret, and a shame that haunted her for many years. Now, six years later, Alice Cooper is no longer that desperate girl who begged to be seen. She's the queen of a half-billion-dollar empire, and the city that once crushed her now bows to her feet. But the past catches up to her sooner and faster than she could ever imagine. Thomas is losing money, and his empire is crumbling… and now he comes crawling back to her, begging for help. Her aunt, Samantha gives her an ultimatum… help Thomas rebuild his empire or watch her darkest secret exposed to the world. With threats closing in and the safety of her child hanging on the line, Alice must decide… assist the same people who broke her, to keep her secret buried… or destroy them all, even if it means risking everything she has ever built.

On the day I received my prenatal test results, I heard a voice from inside my belly—my unborn child speaking to me. 'Mom, Dad will divorce you as soon as you give birth to me. His true love can't have children. That's why he married you. You're just a tool to give birth. Once I'm born, he'll divorce you, take me away, and go live happily ever after with her.' I believed every word. Without hesitation, I chose divorce. For nine months, I focused on carrying the pregnancy, planning to raise the child on my own. But on the day I went into labor, something went terribly wrong. The doctor said the baby was premature, and the position was dangerously abnormal. "The baby keeps flipping around inside you," she said. "It's like it's deliberately putting you through hell." Eight hours of emergency treatment accomplished nothing. In the end, it was a difficult labor—both mother and child died. As my consciousness faded, I heard that voice again. 'Haha. Dad never cheated at all. I lied to you.' Why would a child lie? I couldn't understand it, not even at the moment of death. When I opened my eyes again, I was back on the very day I first received the prenatal test report.

Each of my three ex-boyfriends ends up committing suicide right after eating food that my mother, Florence Winters, makes. Their deaths are very different from one another, with the only similarity being that they all eat food made by Mom before they die. Mom goes viral in an instant. She becomes the center of everyone's attention, and she is even taken away by the police. But they never manage to find anything wrong with any of the food she makes. I don't dare to get into another relationship. I pack my things and move out of the house, leaving Mom. Two years later, Mom shows up at my engagement party. She proceeds to feed my fiance, Lawrence Smith, some food…

As the older brother, I agreed to marry a dead woman just to get the five hundred thousand dollars for my younger brother to get married. My younger brother insisted that the middle-aged couple, who had lost their daughter, only wanted their daughter to experience being married before her death. My girlfriend also persuaded me to do it. She said I just needed to lie in the same bed as her for one night and do nothing. I nodded and agreed. But when I got to that family’s house, the parents pulled out a white bedsheet and handed it to me. “You have to actually be intimate with my daughter. Otherwise, I won’t pay you a single cent.”