Dirty Tagalog Jokes

It disgusted me to know that my parents arranged my marriage to one of my 'ninongs'. Only to find out, he was the same stranger I gave my virginity to last night.

Wild and immodest are just a few words na ikinakabit sa pangalan ni Atashia Magnoia. Bakit? Anak kasi siya ng isang babaeng mababa ang lipad. People condemn her because of her mother's work. Dahil dito kaya simula noong bata pa siya ay pilit niyang pinatutunayan sa lahat na iba siya sa kaniyang ina. Sa kabila ng pangmamaltrato na kaniyang nararanasan, hindi niya magawang iwanan ang kaniyang nanay. Wala kasi siyang ibang matatawag na pamilya maliban dito. Hanggang sa dumating si Lance Henzon sa buhay ni Atashia. Wala siyang pakialam sa kung anuman ang kinamulatan na buhay ng dalaga. Sa kabila ng pagiging CEO ng Henzon Group of Companies, walang takot niyang aalisin ang babaeng minamahal sa putikan na kinasasadlakan nito, kahit kapalit noon ay madungisan ang apelyido na iniingatan niya. Handa siyang maging tanga at katawa-tawa sa ngalan ng pag-ibig. Pakakasalan niya si Atashia dahilan para isumpa siya ng kan'yang buong pamilya. Iiwan n'ya ang karangyaan at magtratrabaho siya bilang isang construction worker para buhayin ang kaniyang asawa. Sa kabila ng hirap, magiging masaya silang dalawa. Ngunit isang aksidente ang babago sa lahat. Sa muling pag-gising ni Lance, mamumulat siya sa katotohanan na ang kan'yang asawa ay nakalimutan na ang kanilang sumpaan at naging katulad na rin ng kaniyang biyenan. Bukod pa roon, may anak na si Atashia na pilit ipinaaako sa kaniya. Ang pusong dating wagas kung magmahal ay babalutin ng matinding poot at kasamaan na magdudulot ng matinding sugat sa mga puso nila. Ang kasal na nagbibigkis sa dalawa ay tatalikuran ni Lance at sa iba niya hahanapin ang panibagong kaligayahan. Ngunit paano kung gawin ni Atashia ang lahat upang muli siyang mapaibig, babalikan n'ya pa rin ba ang kan'yang asawa sa kabila ng pagkakaroon nito ng dirty secret?

Hindi akalain ni Mutya na magagawa nga talaga nyang pikutin ang among si Drake ngunit ngayon ay bigla na lang nabahag ang kanyang buntot at ayaw na niyang ituloy ang binabalak. Kailangan niyang makaalis ng kwarto bago pa magising si Drake. Dahan dahan niyang pinihit ang seradura ng pinto upang hindi sya makagawa ng ingay. Laking gulat na lamang nya dahil hindi pa man nya tuluyang nabubuksan ang pintuan ay may tumulak na nito mula sa labas kasunod ang maraming kislap at tunog ng camera. “Miss ikaw ba ang bagong girlfriend ni Drake Rufino?” “Nasa loob ba sya?” “Gano na kayo katagal?” Sunod sunod na katungan ng mga reporters. Sa takot ay napaurong sya. Hindi nya alam ang gagawin. Napatigil ang dalaga sa pag-urong nang bumangga sya sa matitipunong dibdib mula sa lalaking nakatayo sa kanyang likuran. Gising na si Drake. “Whats going on here?” halata sa mukha ng lalaki na bagong gising pa ito. Nakapulupot sa hubo't hubad nitong katawan ang puting kumot....

Sky Isabelle Honralez Bustamante, a beautiful and intelligent heiress. She is every woman’s envy. But behind that glamorous exterior is a very lonely princess who lived her life just to please her father. She even gave up her own dreams para lang makuha ang attention nito. And then one day, she fell from grace, hard. But Sky had enough. She got fed up fighting and decided to run away. With no destination in mind, she packed her bags and left everything behind. Miguel dela Cruz: komikero, matikas, at higit sa lahat, ubod nang gwapo. Actually, he could pass as a Calvin Klein/Armani model. Idagdag na rin natin na pang toothpaste commercial pa ang ngiti nito. Ang isang kagaya nito ay nababagay sa mga cover magazines at runway fashion shows. May mga pa-english-english pa kuno itong nalalaman. Ngunit sa likod nang magagandang katangiang tinataglay nito nagtatago ang misteryong bumabalot sa buo nitong pagkatao. The beautiful heiress and the handsome country bumpkin. One is trying to run away from her past while the other is being chased by his future. These two are in for a serious turmoil of emotions. Sky is trying to keep her distance. She builds up walls around her dahil alam niyang masasaktan lang siya and she doesn’t know if she can handle it. And Miguel, the man who’s a push and pull, but is always there to catch her when she feels like she’s falling. They are like magnets being drawn together, hanggang sa wala na silang takas. But just when everything is about to fall into place perfectly, saka naman sila naisipang paglaruan nang tadhana. Their past and future caught up to them at sa isang iglap nagbago ang lahat. Mahanap pa kaya nila ang daan pabalik sa isa’t isa?

Love turned into hatred, and now shes out for revenge. Losing her son will lead her to revenge. Iris Lou Ephraim is a humble woman who has never given up in a fight, but what if fate is her opponent? Will she still fight? She did nothing but love the man he adores, so why is fate punishing her? Don't think of her as a saint; she isn't. She is not easily thrown to the ground. She has the ability to kill you in an instant. Her outward appearance is that of an angel, but she is the devil on the inside. HATRED VENGEANCE, Is within Her. Let us investigate the mysterious life of Iris Lou Clifford, a woman full of mysteries.

A professor named Zedic Lim seeks justice for his bereaved brother, but playful destiny seems to be playing by the rules for them when he meets a student named Mischell Flor, Mischell is a brave girl facing her difficult part of her life. Striving for her dream while smiling in front of everyone just to say that she is really okay even if she is not. The two people meet at the wrong time and try to fight the crazy thing called love. Trying to fight with playful fate. Will they win the game of love?

' A girl really needs a job to have a money for her Mother's sick ' ' She want her Mother to take a operation, just to make her Mother fine ' ' What if the only chance to have her a money is to pretend? ' ' Not just easy pretend,She need to pretend as the unknown guy GIRLFRIEND? Does she will accept it or reject it? '

Samantha Lee’s life was already a mess. A top cheerleader in New York, juggling school pressure and a rocky relationship with her single mother, the last thing she expected was to catch her boyfriend cheating—at a party, no less. One reckless night and too much alcohol later, she wakes up next to Tyler—the arrogant, straight-A hockey star who’s also her academic rival and personal nemesis. Things couldn’t get worse… until her mother announces she's getting remarried—to Tyler’s father. Now, Samantha is stuck under the same roof as the one guy she swore to avoid. He’s off-limits. Her stepbrother. The boy she can’t stop thinking about. As secrets grow harder to hide and sparks fly in the most forbidden ways, Samantha and Tyler must face the truth: staying apart might be the right thing to do… but falling in love might be inevitable. Sport Affair (His Little Dirty Secret) is a steamy, emotional rollercoaster of forbidden love, rivalry, and second chances.

Handang isakripisyo ni Agathe Clementine Capucine ang lahat para sa kanyang ina. Napilitan siyang makipagkasundo kay Gunther Percival Silvestri, ang tagapagmana ng pinakamayamang pamilya na namuno sa Stonewood City sa loob ng maraming siglo, dahil nasa panganib ang buhay niya at ng kanyang ina. Maliban sa pagpapagamot ng kanyang ina at maligtas ang kanyang buhay, inisip niya kung ano pa ang maaaring mangyari. Hindi niya inaasahan, gayunpaman, na sa gabing iyon, siya ay ikakasal kay Gunther at magpapanggap bilang kanyang tapat na asawa habang pumipirma ng kontrata para gawing pormal ang kanilang pagsasama. Nag umpisang maguluhan si Agathe habang lumilipas ang mga buwan. Nakikipaglaro pa ba siya, o nakahanap na ba ng paraan si Gunther para makuha ang wasak na puso niya?

Willow’s life was already a dangerous temptation, sharing a roof with four handsome, towering, and domineering stepbrothers who push every boundary between family and fantasy. But when her father is murdered and her home drenched in blood, on the same day a truth unfolded: her stepbrothers weren't always what they seemed, they were lycans and fate had cruelly marked her to them. Now on the run from traitors of her pack and hunted by an unknown enemy who wants her blood to break a curse she doesn't even have a slightest clue of, Willow is trapped between the pull of her stepbrothers' touch and the fear of surrendering to them completely. The more they protect her in her new surrounding, the more she falls for them and wants to explore her fantasies. They all made a promise to return Willow back to her pack when she's ready and reclaim her father's title as Alpha, but as jealousy began to creep in and the desire to share her diminished into a heated rivalry, can they fulfill their promise to her or this is to be a bond even the moon goddess might regret?