Fucked Up Jokes

His hand fisted in my hair while the silk tie kept my wrists helpless above my head, his voice dark and thick with lust against my neck. “You’re soaking my fucking pants, Celeste—moaning like a needy little wife who wants to be fucked until she forgets her husband’s name. Is that what you want?” I arched into him, breath hitching as the words tumbled out, “Yes, sir.” ___ Celeste Maddox is the picture-perfect political wife, composed, elegant, and utterly unwanted. Behind closed doors, her marriage to golden boy Ethan is a hollow performance: no affection, no passion, just cold smiles and a carefully curated public image. But everything shatters when she walks in on Ethan tangled in the sheets with her own sister. Heartbroken and reckless, Celeste lets herself unravel for one night in the arms of a commanding stranger—someone who touches her like she matters, who makes her ache and moan like she’s never known pleasure before. She never planned to see him again. But fate has other plans because the stranger? He’s Dr. Rowan Wolfe, the couples therapist Ethan hires to fix their broken marriage. Now, every session is torture. Every glance, a spark.And when Ethan stops showing up, Rowan doesn’t stop seeing her. Talking turns to touching. Therapy turns to sin. And Celeste finds herself tied to the bed of the one man who makes her forget every vow she ever made. She swore she’d never cheat. He swore she was only his plaything. They’re both liars. However, some sins are worth every damn consequence.

Born without her family's birthmark, Tessa is branded a bastard by the richest man in the pack, her father and forced into a life of servitude in the Alpha’s lodge.  Her only ally and friend was Jasmine, her stepsister; fated to marry George, the Alpha’s heir. But George isn’t just ruthless, he’s a beast who toys with women and hides his darkest hunger behind storm-grey eyes. When Tessa overhears George plotting to use and discard Jasmine, she vows to expose him, even if it means risking everything.  But the moment his eyes land on Tessa, she becomes trapped in his suffocating grip. Tessa, knowing her life will never be the same, must either protect her sister from the man who could destroy them both… or surrender to the dangerous allure that threatens to consume her.

Di pesta ulang tahunnya, Gilena sedang berharap dalam bahasa Jerman di depan kue ulang tahunnya. “Semoga tahun ini Tante Jolin bisa jadi ibuku.” Suami mengelus kepala Gilena sambil tersenyum, lalu berkata, “Keinginanmu akan segera terwujud.” Aku tercengang, kue di tanganku langsung jatuh ke lantai. Suami bertanya dengan penuh perhatian, “Kau kenapa?” Aku menggelengkan kepala dan jawab sambil tersenyum, “Tanganku licin.” Hanya aku sendiri yang tahu, aku panik karena mengerti bahasa Jerman, sampai-sampai kue pun terjatuh dari tanganku.

Jessiah is a make-up artist aspiring to break into the modeling and beauty industry. She moves to LA when she lands a job at one of the biggest production companies in Hollywood. On her first week on the job, she meets Jenson Ross, a big-deal actor with a murky past and a dark secret only a privileged few know about. × Genres: Romance, Werewolf, Crime EXCERPT [BOOK I of CALI ALPHAS ] _ _ _ "Dollface," he murmured with a little smirk. He snickered and caressed the back of her head, pulling her closer to his chest. "You're like an antidepressant, in human form." Her breath caught.  Her heart sped up when his hug tightened. His warm face pressed onto her neck, his strong hands lightly squeezing her hips. Moments like this only worsened her attraction to him.  The flirty jokes, the easy conversations, the small smiles, his furtive glances, and his unusually sweet gestures lately... She was in deep trouble. Was he kissing her neck?  Shit. He was no longer thinking straight.  About this. About her. About the consequences. He drew her closer when she tried to pull away. As if he didn't want her out of his sight. While his beard scraped her skin, his thighs touched hers. Her throat ached as he stared into her eyes. "Dammit," he sighed, his thumb tracing the curve of her neck, his touch both gentle and eager.  "Why are you so f-cking beautiful?"  "Joss, I need to g—" "Why now?" he murmured, stroking her cheek. He wasn't acting drunk or playing with her.  Not like this. He wouldn't. Not with her real feelings barely held together by some unspoken truths. Otherwise he wouldn't dare let it get this far.  But why wouldn't he let go? "Just stay. Please. Stay here with me." _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

"Fuck me like you've never fucked any woman , daddy!!I want your cock!“ I moaned throatily, thrashing wildly in ecstasy as Alex fingered my clit right left and center.Slapping my ass cheeks and breasts soundly. "I hope you'll keep saying that ,you slut when I slam my ten inch cock into your hole !" He whispered hoarsely into my cunt and slurped my feminine juices with his devastatingly hot tongue. ~~~~~~~~~~~~ A wild night. A stranger’s touch. A signature she can’t remember. When Chiara Hayes wakes up in an unfamiliar penthouse, aching, ringed, and legally bound to Alexander Carrington — the enigmatic billionaire with a scandalous past — she realizes her hangover is the least of her problems. Once accused of two brutal crimes, Alex has rebuilt his empire and his name from ashes. He doesn’t need love. He needs a wife — on paper, at least. One year of marriage, that’s the deal. All Chiara has to do is play along: smile at the cameras, endure his icy family, and help him close the deal of a lifetime. In exchange, he’ll protect her from the mess her life has become. But what begins as a business arrangement turns into something dangerously real. Desire blurs the line between truth and lies, and every kiss pulls her deeper into a web of secrets. When old memories resurface — ones that tie her to the Carrington empire and a tragedy buried for years — Chiara must face a chilling question: Can she trust the man she’s married to… or did she just fall in love with her family’s killer?

He went to my backside and started trailing his kisses on my back. "I want you to stay still for me Addie. Can you do that for me?" I was moaning my answers, I just couldn't seem to think. "Answer me, Adriana, I will reward you with every answer you give me." ***** Adriana is a very successful business woman. She had powerful, successful, wealthy men and women on her grips. Coming from a dark world of prostitution she knows how to make money. She's the daughter of a very dangerous and notorious business man. She never had boyfriends, she had lovers, she enjoyed sex, one thing for sure, she would never commit. She was daddy's little girl. She loved her father more than anything in the world. ***** Alexander is a very handsome playboy actor. He wasn't always this wealthy. But he was an inspiring actor, and he had fucked his way up the ladder. He'd do anything for power, for money. He craved the envious looks of other people when they saw him bathed in luxury and beauty. He's your typical male specimen with ripples of muscles and face to kiss and licked. He's your sex on a stick and he knows it and had play it to his advantage numerous times before. He was on the top of his game after twenty years being in the industry. That was why it shocked him, when his agent Drew told him to call a very expensive escort service, to fix him a date for his next premier. Alexander was not ready when he called Adriana, her voice gave him the chills down below his belt.

It isn't normal for a student to have transfer to a completely different university on the opposite side of the country during their last year but Rianna had never been normal and neither her life. Staying at her old school meant putting herself into a scandalous position, forever staining her record while leaving meant she could start over. Choosing to leave, Rianna soon meets a sinfully attractive guy by the man of John who lives next door. However though he was devilishly handsome, there was something very mysterious and dark about him that Rianna couldn't put her finger on. She was desperate to know more about him and one evening of snooping around where she couldn't have been puts her in a very dangerous situation. She just hopes that their Sexual relationship would be enough for him not to kill her. He is dark and scaring. He was watching me as I rode his cock. With our eyes locked together, l began to feel it, it felt so fucking good. His eyes traveled from my eyes , down over my body and stopped at my southern parts. He watched me as I fucked him. It was such a turn on that l couldn't stop , no matter how hard I tried. "Touch yourself, show me how you like to be touched, Rianna....", His eyes came back to mine for a split second before l slid my hands up to my breasts. As l began to massage them and lightly pinch my nipples between my fingers, l watched John watch my every move. His thrusts became more intense as he watched me. "Yeah that's it", He growled. "Fucking hell, woman"

"Hey, beautiful." I turned around slowly to see a guy approaching me from the party. "I'm not interested." "But, I am." He cackled. "Well, that's too bad, huh?" I laughed, leaning against the wall as my vision cleared a bit. "Shut up." "And why should she listen to you?" That's when I noticed Tyson leaning against the refrigerator with his arms crossed over his chest. "And who might you be?" The guy turned to face Tyson instead of me. "Her boyfriend?" "No, but I'm the guy who just fucked your mom, and she said I should tell you how much she enjoyed it since your father can't compare." "You're a dead man walking, punk!" The guy charged at Tyson. And next thing I knew, Tyson was pulling the guy up from the floor by his shirt and shoving him towards the exit, effortlessly. I smirked. ☆☆☆☆ Ashley, the daughter of a millionaire, moves to a new city and hopes for a fresh start. With her sharp wit, she often finds herself at the center of school drama, not by choice, but by circumstances. Intent on maintaining a low profile at her new campus, her plan quickly falls apart when she mistakenly parks her bike in a reserved spot. Tyson, the school's notorious bad boy, is not just a troublemaker, but he's the youngest gang leader to be a part of a powerful mafia, feared by many but understood by few. Despite his fearsome reputation in the streets while other leaders might see him as a mere boy, Tyson is fiercely loyal to his inner circle, showing a side of him that few ever see. What will happen when their paths cross? ☆☆☆☆ "𝑫𝒆𝒅𝒊𝒄𝒂𝒕𝒆𝒅 𝒕𝒐 𝒂𝒍𝒍 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒈𝒊𝒓𝒍𝒔 𝒘𝒉𝒐 𝒅𝒐𝒆𝒔𝒏'𝒕 𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒓𝒕 𝒂 𝒇𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒕, 𝒃𝒖𝒕 𝒔𝒖𝒓𝒆 𝒌𝒏𝒐𝒘𝒔 𝒉𝒐𝒘 𝒕𝒐 𝒇𝒊𝒏𝒊𝒔𝒉 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒎." ☆☆☆☆

"You think you have a choice?" Vittorio squeezed my nipples with his hand and my sanity with the other. “ You were never going to be anyone else's from the moment I set eyes on you”. His voice a deadly whisper His words cut through me making my chest tighten with fear "You’re Ours, kitten," he continued, his gaze locking onto mine and stealing the breath from my lungs. "You will be claimed, used, and Fucked however I see fit. Do you understand?" "I... I understand," I whispered, feeling my resistance crumble under his dark, green eyes. "You will lay before me, Katarina," he commanded his voice a low growl. "Spread your swollen pussy wide, and show me how desperate you are for me to fuck you." Katarina Delgado was supposed to belong to another man. Sold like property to Mafia Don Giordano, her virginity was payment for a debt her father couldn't afford. But when her brother Mateo tries to save her and fails, she ends up in the hands of a deadlier monster: Vittorio De Luca, the brutal mafia king who cages her, collars her, and whispers filth like love. Now, locked in a war between cartels, Katarina is the prize. But not just for Vittorio. Valentino De Luca, his missing twin, has returned. Sharper. Slower. Unhinged. And he doesn’t want to steal her. He wants to share her. Together. In a world of cages, kings, and betrayal, the only thing more dangerous than being wanted… is being wanted by both of them.

He smirked, knowing he was on the winning side. "So it's a done deal for three months?" He raised his eyebrows, putting his hand forth for a handshake. I looked at the long fingers and perfectly aligned nails and then at his patient face. Sighing to myself I my own hand into his and ignored the tingles that flowed through every nerve as his fingers curled around my hand and shook it lightly. "Yeah three months." "Goodnight then." He winked, removing his hand from mine and turned to walk away. "Hey wait!" I called out, suddenly remembering something. "You don't have my number." "What makes you think that? I have my ways Smith." And with one last wink I saw him take a turn and disappear from my sight. I let out a long breath, leaning on the nearby wall. Looks like I just made a deal with the Devil. * A sarcastic girl, a cocky guy. Throw in some mystery, murder, filthy jokes, wonderful friends, tons of kisses, secrets, surprises, eye-rolls and a killer on run. And you have got yourself a story never read before. ***So grab a cup of hot chocolate, some chips and a warm blanket and get ready to laugh, cry and bite your lip in anticipation. Enjoy!!