Fucked Up Jokes

“I’m wet for you, King Nightbane. I’m soaked.” I growled. Not from pain but from the effect of her words. Her touch. Her relentless stokes. She didn’t need to tell me. I could smell her. She filled the room with her intoxicating arousal. “I’ve always wondered what it would feel like to be fucked all night like a dirty slut.” “To have my hand wrapped around your phallus like a possession.” “To have it… buried in me.” “To have your tongue worship every inch of my body.” FELYNDRA She was a normal girl living in her small village pack. When she turned eighteen, she discovered a new side of herself: a beast who would roam every crescent moon to kill the unjust. When a bounty was placed on her, she was suddenly sold by her parents to be a breeder for the cruel alpha king. Why her? Why not her sister? They said she was wolfless. They look at her and see a wolfless girl but if only they knew she was no wolf. She was something more sinister: a Crescent Fox. She accepted her fate, hoping to leave after giving the king a son. NIGHTBANE VOIDHEART He is the infamous cruel alpha king. His reputation precedes him. He believes his mate doesn’t exist, as he has traveled every corner of the world in search of her. When the breeder showed up, everything changed. She was just a breeder, a secret to be kept from the woman he was engaged to. And yet , she consumed him. The ache in his teeth, the raw hunger in his veins - she drove him insane. He wanted her. To taste her blood but why did the shadows whisper that if he did, it would be the end of them?

Ethan telah meninggal. Menjelang pemakamannya, Olivia membereskan barang-barang peninggalannya dan menemukan sebuah album foto tebal. Di sampulnya tertulis, [Cinta Sejati] Namun ketika dibuka, isi album itu bukan foto Olivia sebagai sang istri. Melainkan Emma. Gadis yang dulu diasuh oleh Ethan. Tak hanya itu, seluruh harta warisan Ethan juga diberikan kepada Emma. Akhirnya, Olivia meninggal dunia dengan penuh penyesalan. Tapi, saat membuka mata lagi, dirinya justru kembali ke masa sebelum menikah dengan Ethan. Kali ini, Olivia tidak akan lagi mengorbankan segalanya demi pria itu. Dia memilih menjalani hidup untuk dirinya sendiri dan pergi mengejar mimpinya. Namun yang tak diduga, di kehidupan kali ini, Ethan malah gila saat tahu dirinya pergi dan mencarinya ke seluruh penjuru dunia.

“Get the fuck away from her!” Owen shouted his voice heavy with desperation. “She is my Luna.” “No, Alpha.” Damon replied. “She’s mine.” *** Omega Callie always lived a quiet and humble life, with her fantasies of finding a mate one day. When the day finally came, her mate turned out to be none other than the Alpha of her park. Sadly, she was rejected and hurt. Her fate was sealed until Lycan Damon had a reason to visit her park. But with every blessing, comes a curse. Will Callie accept her new life regardless of the circumstances? Would she finally get her revenge? Explore a tale of romance, suspense, treachery, and love. The fascinating novel ‘Prophecy of the Lycan Queen will have you reading until the very last page.

Untuk menyembuhkan depresi si putri kaya palsu, kekasih masa kecilku yang pernah bersumpah hanya akan menikah denganku, Darryl, diam-diam pergi mendaftarkan pernikahan dengannya. Di belakangnya, aku menyetujui perjodohan keluargaku. Aku menikah dengan pewaris keluarga konglomerat di ibu kota, Vincent, yang diam-diam telah mencintaiku selama bertahun-tahun. Setelah tujuh tahun menikah, dia memanjakanku sepenuh hati. Malam demi malam dia selalu menuntut kemesraan dariku. Bahkan jika aku menginginkan bintang di langit, dia tetap akan berusaha mengambilkannya untukku. Aku sempat mengira, akhirnya aku telah menemukan kebahagiaan. Hingga suatu kali setelah bercinta, aku tidak sengaja mendengar percakapan Vincent dengan sahabatnya. "Avril sudah jadi aktris internasional peraih penghargaan. Kapan kamu mau pisah sama Ariel?" "Toh sama saja harus nikah sama orang yang nggak kucintai, jadi mau sama siapa pun itu nggak ada bedanya. Lagi pula, aku harus jaga Ariel agar dia nggak mengganggu kebahagiaan yang didapatkan Avril dengan susah payah." Aku membuka komputer di ruang kerjanya. Di dalam sebuah folder tersembunyi, tersimpan ratusan ribu foto Avril dan seratus surat cinta yang tak pernah dia kirimkan. Setidak percaya apa pun pada kenyataan, saat ini aku benar-benar sudah harus sadar. Aku membeli sebuah tubuh plastik, lalu merancang sebuah kebakaran besar. Mulai saat ini, entah di langit atau di neraka, aku tak akan pernah bertemu dengannya lagi.

Setelah terlahir kembali, aku memutuskan untuk tidak terobsesi pada teman sejak kecilku, Jacky Halim. Di pesta ulang tahunnya, dia memasang plakat di pintu masuk. Dia menulis namaku di samping logo anjing, dilarang masuk. Jadi, aku sengaja pergi ke Hawai untuk menghindar jauh-jauh darinya. Dia bilang mual dan jijik saat mencium bauku di rumah, jadi aku pun memilih pindah rumah dengan patuh. Setelah itu, dia bilang setelah tamat nanti, dia tidak ingin menghirup udara kota yang sama denganku. Jadi aku cepat-cepat angkat kaki pergi dan tidak pernah kembali lagi. Terakhir, dia bilang keberadaanku gampang membuat wanita idamannya salah paham. Aku menggangguk kepala. Tak lama kemudian, aku pun menemukan pria lain dan mengumumkan hubungan kami. Di kehidupan kali ini, aku selalu membuat keputusan yang berbeda dengan kehidupan sebelumnya. Semua ini hanya karena di kehidupan yang sebelumnya, saat impianku menikah dengan Jacky terwujud, wanita idaman Jacky bunuh diri dengan loncat dari tebing. Dia menuduhku sebagai dalang pembunuhnya. Dia pun mulai menyiksaku, sampai akhirnya aku mati dan mayatku menjadi santapan ikan. Di kehidupan kali ini, aku hanya ingin hidup tenang. Kemudian, saat aku merangkul tangan pacar baruku. Jacky malah mengadang di tengah jalan dengan mata merah padam. “Vivi, kalau kamu ikut denganku sekarang, aku akan memaafkan semua lelucon yang kamu buat.”

She was left at the altar. Her fiancé married another woman right in front of her. Joan Richard's perfect life collapsed in a single moment. Humiliated and grieving she disappears to a quiet town with nothing but her father’s old motorcycle and a heart full of rage. There, she meets Jax Wolfe a rugged, tattooed biker with a past as brutal as hers and a name that isn’t what it seems. He’s running from a bloodstained past. She’s running from betrayal. Neither of them is looking for love. But love doesn’t wait for permission. It crashes in loud and fast, like chrome on asphalt. And love on two wheels? It’s dangerous. It’s reckless. And it never comes without a price.

Fernando is the scion of the Quinn family, one of the wealthiest families in the capital. He should be living in the prime of his life, surrounded by honor and luxury. But three years ago, he was expelled from the Quinn family-the tendons in his hands and feet were mercilessly cut off. Michael, Joyce's father, took pity on him and helped him, even getting his daughter married to Fernando. From then on, all members of the Nagel family regarded Fernando as a failed man, someone unworthy of standing by Joyce's side. They kept trying to convince her to divorce him. However, little did they know... the man they despised was actually one of the richest men in the country. What will happen when the truth is finally revealed?

Setelah aku meninggal, orang tuaku menandatangani surat persetujuan donor organ dan memberikan retina mataku kepada anak angkat kesayangan mereka, Emma Moore. Emma pun menikah dengan kakak kandungku. Mereka hidup bahagia sebagai keluarga yang utuh. Seumur hidup, aku selalu bersaing dengannya, tetapi ujung-ujungnya aku kehilangan segalanya dan berakhir tragis. Setelah terlahir kembali, aku memilih menjalani hidup tanpa memikirkan siapa pun dan justru itulah awal dari kebahagiaan yang tak pernah kuduga.

“You can feel it right? The burning attraction.” Giovanni whispers, trapping her by the wall. He rests his palm beside her head, lowering his head to her height. Mia swallows her spit as she automatically clasps her thighs together trying to soothe the ache down there. “No– I don't feel anything.” she says trying to sound firm, but her voice betrays her coming out in a breathy whisper. He smirks, trailing his fingers down her cheeks tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. “Deny all you want. You. Are. Mine!!!” he growls, slamming his lips down on hers hard. ~~~~ Mia Neomi didn't know what she dragged herself into when she innocently saved a mafia lord from death in a dark alley one night. Thinking everything was going to be fine after she woke to an empty bed, life shows her it's more fucked up than she thinks when they meet in the most uncanny way ever. The man she saved turns out to be her cold, ruthless, and merciless boss at her office, Mr Giovanni Antonio. A cold blooded killer, the Capo of the Italian Mafia. A man whose sole purpose is to ruin everything he touches. He hates her because he can't stop thinking about her while she hates him because he makes her life hell. But when the attraction overtakes the hatred. Mia soon discovers that the man she is attracted to isn't who he says he is, and the woman he is attracted to isn't who he thinks she is. Lies, secrets, and betrayal threatens to tear them apart. Will their attraction conquer it all? Or will they be consumed in the web that entangles them together? I mean is attraction even worth fighting for?

Cora Watson held onto her husband’s promise from three years ago and did whatever she could to please him. She loved him dearly even if he, himself forgot about his promise and shattered her heart, ruthlessly. Now, she’s had enough! She would get divorced from him and would never let him or anyone trample over her ever again! *** I watched as she bent her head and kissed his lips while gyrating her hips at the same time. She seemed to be on cloud nine as she rode him faster and harder. My breath was stuck in my throat. Though I could only see his side view I couldn’t miss the shirt on his body. He was still clad in a shirt though the lower half of his body was exposed. It was a shirt I had specially picked for my husband this morning. A custom-made shirt that I had gotten for him on his last birthday and he was currently on it while being fucked by another woman.