Funniest Ways To Die Novels & Stories

My parents have adopted an AI son called Adam. On the day he gets adopted, I get viewed by my family as a nuisance, for some reason. Dad hates how mischievous and cheeky I am. Mom thinks I'm inferior to Adam in every way. My older sister, Sapphire Griffin, even shouts at me. "What else are you capable of doing other than fighting with me over everything?" I feel like crying because the family has turned against me. So, I shove Adam to the floor out of rage. Mom's expression darkens instantly. She then slaps me in the face with all the strength she can muster. "Adam is your little brother! Oh, if only you're just as obedient and understanding as he is! I wouldn't have a building headache because of you! "Well, I want you to study at Elite Smart Academy and learn how to become a docile son!" I'm forced into an exchange program with Adam. That's how I begin studying at Elite Smart Academy. Three years later, my parents and Sapphire pick me up from the academy. When they call out to me, I don't move an inch at all. The director, Bruce Harrison, says with a smile, "Mr. Griffin, you need to say 'Power on, Unit 1314' for it to boot up."

After discovering her longtime boyfriend cheated on her, Evelyn Hart walks into a blind date arranged by her family angry, heartbroken, and determined to erase the past. Sitting across from a calm, sharply handsome stranger, she blurts out the most reckless idea of her life: “Let’s get married.” To her disbelief, Jesse Ward agrees. Evelyn thinks she’s marrying a stable, ordinary man who might give her a quiet life. What she doesn’t know is that Jesse wasn’t her intended blind date at all and that he’s secretly a powerful billionaire who lives far from the spotlight. As they settle into marriage, unexpected feelings begin to grow. But Jesse seems haunted by something unspoken. And Evelyn can’t understand why he sometimes looks at her like he already knows her. A sudden accident shakes loose a buried memory in Evelyn’s mind: a reckless night years ago, a stranger whose face she never forgot and that face matches her husband’s perfectly. In that instant, everything clicks into place. Their marriage was impulsive. Their meeting was accidental. But their connection? It began long before either of them realized.

"That's it, baby girl. Take Daddy's cock like the good little slut you are." My boyfriend's father had me bent over his desk, hand wrapped around my throat, splitting me open with his thick cock while my boyfriend was on the line. * * * Forget what you know about love stories. This is a fucking raw, no-filter plunge into the depraved fantasies you only jerk off to when you're home alone. This collection is your VIP pass to the kind of filth that leaves you shaking—where powerful bosses bend you over their desks' and depraved strangers use your holes in dirty alleyways before vanishing into the night. We're talking about the kind of raw, pulse-pounding taboo that gets you off: forbidden age gaps, rough, messy gangbangs, public throat-fucking that steals your voice, and first times that leave you gaping, dripping, and ruined for anyone else. Consider this your final warning. This is explicit, vulgar, and engineered to soak your panties. If you can't handle stories drenched in choking, rough anal, non-con/dub-con kinks, and filthy-mouthed sluts who beg to be used like the cum-dumpsters they are, close this book now. But if you're ready to get utterly wrecked—if you're craving that full-body, mind-melting, vibrator-on-high kind of climax that leaves you a boneless, dripping mess... Your next orgasm is waiting. Turn the page. We promise you'll be a good girl for us.

Three nights ago, I was locked inside my own family’s underground wine cellar. When my congenital heart condition hit, I called my husband, Zane Corleone, and begged him to come save me. He didn’t come. Instead, he stayed with another woman all night because she was afraid of the dark—and told me to stop faking it for attention. That was the moment I finally understood. If he cared that much about her, then I would do the one thing neither of them expected. I would make room for her. In three days, I would disappear from his world completely.

It's 11:30 pm. Home alone, I decide to order some takeout. When the map shows the delivery guy is zero miles away, I receive a call from him. I pick up, only to hear unsettling silence from the other end. I hang up, annoyed. The next moment, the guy texts me, "Sorry, I'm hearing-impaired and unable to speak. I called to notify you to pick up your food as soon as possible. I can't explain things over the phone, and I apologize for that." Then comes another text. "You must've been waiting for a long time. I've left your order at your door, so please pick it up as soon as you can." Just as I prepare to open the door, I see bars of live comments—reminiscent of livestream chats—floating right before my eyes. "Don't open the door! That dude isn't a delivery guy at all! He's a murderer!" "He called you to check if you're a woman living alone!" "Seriously, why are all thriller story protagonists always so dumb? The delivery guy is obviously suspicious, yet she still wants to open the door."

“Spread that tight little pussy for me. It’s mine tonight,” Callum growled in my ear as he slammed into me. “Yes. Claim me. Use me. Don’t stop.” A strangled moan ripped out of me. He drove so hard I could barely breathe. My nails ripped at his shoulders, desperate to hold on, when another hand yanked my hair back. My mouth fell open, and a second cock rammed into my throat. I gagged as spit streamed down my chin. A third voice cracked across me with a sharp smack to my ass, the sting making me cry out. “Good slut. Take it all. You’re nothing but our toy tonight.” Tears blurred my vision and my throat burned raw. My pussy clenched tight around Callum with every brutal drive. I gasped out the only words I had left. “Yes… Daddies. I’ll take everything." •••••••••••••••••• CLAIM ME, DADDIES isn’t here to tease. It drags you to your knees, rips you open, and leaves you begging for more. Inside, you’ll find hotel-room threesomes that leave no hole untouched, office domination that strips away every ounce of control, step-daddy cravings that cross every line, brutal gangbangs that push you past your limits, lesbian hookups that turn sweet into savage, gay encounters that shatter taboos, and roleplay so filthy it will stain your imagination. Every story is built to ruin you in the best way. This collection is for adults only, 18 and over. It contains explicit sex,raw language, taboo roleplay, and extreme scenarios. All stories are pure fiction and meant for erotic entertainment. If you’re under 18, stop reading now.

Eddie's father died when he was 12 years old leaving him to provide for the family. His mother was blind, and he had a little sister named Carol. Eddie was convicted of killing a farmer with his BB Gun while hunting rabbit. Eddie was sent to prison. While in prison he meets Daisy that loved him like a son. Daisy was determined to help Eddie prove he is innocent. Carol becomes ill when Eddie is in prison. Eddie finds a way to visit Carol. Eddie never gives up on returning home to his mother and Carol.

My sister was the golden child, the pride of our family, but she had a rare blood disorder that required treatments costing thousands every month. To keep her alive, I became her personal blood donor, working nonstop to pay for her care and delivering food all day and night. But one day, she nearly died from hemorrhaging after trying to abort a pregnancy. That’s when I learned the child she was carrying belonged to my boyfriend. When I confronted him, he didn’t even flinch. Instead, he dragged me to the operating table himself. “You were born to be her blood bank. Dying for her? It’s the best thing you’ll ever do.” I was left there, bleeding out, my life slipping away with every drop. But as death closed in, something changed. The people who once hoped I’d disappear—the ones who used me, betrayed me—they all began to unravel, losing their insanity.

My husband thought cheating would break me but he was wrong. I let him keep his lover… and took his pack and three alpha bikers wolves bound by loyalty and blood… and me... their human mate with a hunger for revenge. I discover I’m more than a pawn.. I’m their queen.. and anyone who comes for what’s mine won’t survive the night..

“Your words, bunny. Use. Your. Words.” Zephyr growled, and it was all I could do to not come undone right there and then. How do I even use my words when my mouth was already stuffed full with Aeron’s cock? “Tell us who you want.” Tristan probed, twisting his fingers inside me, making my back arch and my cunt clench around the intrusion. “And tell us what you want.” “A—All of you.” I choked out when Aeron let me. “I want all four of you.” I whimpered. “I want to be ruined. Marked. Used.” “That’s not quite what we were hoping for.” Zayden murmured, forcing his thumb in my mouth where Aeron’s cock had been just a minute ago while Zephyr twisted my nipples. “We want to feel your desperation.” My body shook violently, muscles spasmed and I knew that I wouldn’t get what I wanted if I didn’t do as I was told. “I want you to fuck me until I’m wrecked, wretched and the only words I know to utter are your names.” ************* After finding a woman sprawled out on her husband’s bed as he asked her for a divorce, Marian Alford immediately knew there was nothing and no place for her in her marriage. The plan was to drink all night, forget her sorrows, but her life changed when she bumped into them—her husband’s best friends. She knew she shouldn’t want them, but she does, and when they touched her, sparks flew. Marian has no other choice but to submit to the four brothers, who were bound to ruin her in ways she never could have imagined.