Funny Christian Jokes

"You are fucking mine .only i have right to kiss those plump lips . I fucking own your soul. Somia is only Haris's ." Saying this he smashed his lips to mine "Jaana . I might be a playboy back . But its my first kiss . You know according to me lip and forehead kiss is just a symbol of love but I accept it today" saying this he again smashed his lips to mine ................................. "How many kids you want in future?" My eyes widened at her question. Is she for real. "Ooooooo!! you are blushing at the name of kids . So cute!" saying this she pulled my cheeks and suddenly kissed me on my cheeks.She looked down getting embarrassed by her act . She did this unknowingly. I was shocked. .............. She came forward but suddenly she tripped by her dress but I caught her . Our eyes got locked and it seems like the world around us stopped . She fit perfectly in my arms. I can feel her accelerated heart beat. Her rosy lips were the first thing which was making me hard in my pants.Her smell was super intoxicating. ................. We have always heard that there are 6 identical individuals of a person. Is it true? Lets see!! It is always said that opposite attracts. Somia a young girl living in the city of saints, belongs to a middle class family. She is financially helping her father to make the both ends meet. A sweet bubbly self-made girl who knows how to deal with this cruel world. But what happens when she unknowingly falls for a cold hearted devil. Haris a cold hearted devil having several night stands . Love is not his cup of coffee. Join the journey of two opposite natured persons to know what happens when they cross their paths.

"I wonder if I'll ever find love. Maybe so. Maybe not. Someday I'll know." Most supernaturals try to stay out of the spotlight. More so if you're hunted by not just humans, but other supernaturals as well. So 17-year-old Cayce Vance did just that, keep quiet and be invisible. But because of recent events, he moves to a small town near the ocean, away from the hustle and bustle of a metropolis. Here, Cayce hopes to live out his senior year in peace. What he doesn't know is that he's moved right into werewolf territory. And not just any werewolf territory. The werewolf king's territory. The new king of the werewolves, Bennet Fitzroy, has just turned 18, the age when you find your mate if you're a werewolf. He yearns for his mate, whoever it may be. What happens when he learns that his mate is a creature that is half-demon half-angel? And how can Bennet love something that he doesn't know, and how can Cayce love what he fears? A teen romance between a big alpha teddy bear and a tiny cute beastie.

The Falcon Ridge Series Book 3 Six months after the Battle for Black Lake Luke Jackson: Having been with the unit for six years and after the mess in Black Lake, I'm tired. I need to retire. Go home to Red Rock. I haven't been back there since I joined. But my dad tells me the crime there is getting bad and he needs my help with a biker gang called The Lycans. After staying home for six months and seeing nothing being done, I decide I'm headed to California. I don't want my pack. Before I leave, I have one last party. By the time I head home, I'm so drunk I can't see straight. When I see a guy getting beat up, I try to be a hero, but it only ends with me getting beat too. The only thing I remember is a pair of gorgeous green eyes. Alexi Torrent: I am the daughter of the notorious Draco Torrent. Alpha of the Dragons. After my father was murdered and my home destroyed by the Alliance, I vow revenge. I have a plan to enact my vengence on the woman who killed my father. I need resources so I join with The Lycans. I was just about to get what I needed from a contact when the drunk Alpha stumbled upon me. He called me out and my contact ran away. I was angry. I was going to make him pay. That was until I saw his hazel eyes. He may have been a drunk fool, but there was something different about him. So I spare his life. It turns out to be a big mistake for my plans.

Ty was born unlucky. An omega to a cruel pack, he was used and abused, till finally it went to far. When he ends up pregnant he is forced to flee to save his baby, and winds up meeting a rather peculiar gamma wolf.

The older sister of Emma LaRue wasn't looking for love. In fact, the last thing Kaylee LaRue thought as she attended her sister's Caribbean wedding was that she would meet a man as confident as Owen Parker. The suave businessman oozed charm, and when that charm was directed at Kaylee, it gave her pause. She couldn't be sure if the man was actually interested in her or just interested in a good time. In reality, Owen Parker had never met anyone like Kaylee LaRue. The quiet girl from Iowa made him forget to breathe the first time he saw her. When he tried to work his magic, her wit proved to be a match for his, and his charms had no effect. He knew what it looked like- she probably thought that he wanted to have a vacation tryst with her just as Jack Saunders had with Emma. Nothing could be farther from the truth. Kaylee tried hard not to yield to his advances, but their last night in the Caribbean was simply magical. After a passionate night spent in the arms of Owen, Kaylee ruefully observed that there was no fake wedding to keep the two of them together. As she flew home, she thought it'd be back to the same old life for her. She never expected Owen to show up at her door. However, this small town girl wasn't sure she was ready to change for this city boy. When Kaylee tried to fit into Owen's world, everything came crashing down. In the blink of an eye, what seemed like a strong foundation suddenly found itself built on a pillar of sand. Would their relationship blossom like Jack and Emma's, or would the two of them forever be haunted by the memories of rainwater kisses?

Twenty-one-year-old Fay Willmer doesn't like children. But she is forced to become the adoptive mother of a pair of twins belonging to her recently deceased best friend. Little does she know that the children's father is Cade Goldwin, the richest and most powerful man in the town of Axton. At the insistence of the children, Mike and Mika, Fay ends up staying as a nanny at Cade's residence. The twins' mission begins. With their grandmother as an ally, Mike and Mika intend to unite the two people who have always not gotten along and remove the barriers around them.

Hiwalay ang mga magulang ni Laarni Villegas. Ganun pa man kahit hiwalay ay busog siya sa sustento at suporta sa bawat panig. Kaya naman nang piliin niyang maging isang volleyball player ay walang kontra ang mga magulang niya.  Hanggang sa makilala niya ang isang Kyre Mendoza, gwapo, matangkad at nag- uumapaw ng sex appeal na laging nambulabog sa kanya tuwing may laro siya. Isang CEO na may-ari ng team kung saan siya miyembro bilang isang manlalaro.  Paano maiwasan ni Laarni ang isang Kyre na walang ibang ginawa kundi ang palaging pagpapa- cute sa kanya? O dahil sa kakulitan ni kyre ay magiging magkalaro sila sa larangan ng pag-ibig?

Ava, is a woman with big ambitions who will do her best to get them. She is capable of sacrificing anything, including the one she loves. Because of her dream, Ava had to leave. Harris is a man who is unconcerned about his own life. Everyday he will get drunk, as well as play with the hearts of the women he'll meet. When he met Ava, everything changed. He transformed into a decent man for Ava. Misty, on the other hand, is an obsessed hopeless romantic. Envy-filled woman, she was consumed by rage, allowing her to accomplish anything she wanted. Regardless of what will happen, she will do anything to make Ava miserable. Will Harris love be strong enough to wait Ava's return? Will they return to each other's arms when the right time comes? After everything Ava had to sacrifice, can she still choose to be with Harris?

This book contains a few people's points of view. (POV) Which makes the book a little... let's say more dimensional. The main story is about Lilith Taylor being in the wrong place at the wrong time, although it was planned out. She witnesses some gruesome scenes done by Arthur Mikhailov but soon realizes that the one bringing this upon her is the only one who can take it away. The book is filled with mysterious characters and events to keep the reader guessing throughout. Never a too dull moment. Give it a try guys. You never know who will betray you next...

Roohi Kapoor has a problem. Scratch that—she has two problems. First, she’s hopelessly in love with her best friend, Vihan Singh Rathore, who just happens to be the most frustrating playboy in all of Delhi. He flirts with anything that moves in the skirt—except her. Second, her entire family—overprotective brothers, cousins, and all—won’t stop parading eligible bachelors in front of her. As an MD, her family thinks it's time for her to get married and “settle down.” But how can she think about anyone else when her heart is stuck on Mr. Heartbreaker himself? Enter Ron Kapoor, Roohi’s elder brother and legendary love guru. He could easily make a career of solving other people’s romantic disasters, but helping his little sister get together with a notorious playboy? Even he knows this is a recipe for disaster. Especially, when Ron’s strict rules mean Roohi must follow his plan down to the letter… and his plan involves turning the tables on Vihan's flirtatious ways. Can Roohi break free from the friend zone and finally make Vihan see her as more than just his best friend? Or will she end up heartbroken while her brothers plan her next “perfect” match? One thing’s for sure—things are about to get hilariously complicated.