Funny Stories Jokes

So there I was, stuck in this dark Victorian mansion for a whole freaking century, thinking I'd never get out. Then, out of nowhere, these two gorgeous girls swoop in and rescue me! I couldn't believe it, and we instantly hit it off. They showed me a whole new world I'd only ever imagined, and I was all about living a normal human life.   But just when I thought things were looking up, this vampire named Vivaldi pops up out of thin air, grinning like a possessed Jack-o'-lantern. I mean, a name like Vivaldi is bound to give you the creeps, right? He claimed I had some ancient first blood running through my veins and demanded that I sign some crazy blood contract with him—the kind of deal that comes with some seriously freaky consequences.   Vivaldi was trying to sell me the idea that this blood contract was his only lifeline, the only way to save his skin from something worse than death. But I wasn't some clueless newborn vamp; I knew better than to just dive into something as serious as a blood contract. Those things come with some heavy consequences, and I wasn't about to sign up for that without a second thought.   The problem was, if I didn't go along with his messed-up plan, he promised to make my friends' lives a living hell—the very people I'd started to care about. I was trapped between a rock and a hard place. If I decided to team up with Vivaldi, I'd be keeping him around, which is far from ideal. But if I refused, my friends and the whole town of Shadowvale would be in serious danger.    It felt like I was caught in this impossible situation, like I was trying to choose between two rotten apples.

Winter is a rebellious 18-year-old werewolf who is destined to become the Luna Queen of the wolves. Her parents have arranged her marriage with another werewolf named Ryker, whom she has never met or knows anything about. Winter doesn't want to marry him; she feels she is too young to be married and wants the chance to find her true mate. Her two best friends, Elena the fairy and Lillie the witch, promise to help her escape her family. Elena was born without wings, something that has never happened in the fairy world, and Lillie struggles to control her powers. If she doesn't learn how to control them, they will be taken from her. Their friendship is forbidden by all their families. The story follows their friendship as they learn about their powers and try to protect each other from the dangers that lie ahead. Will Winter find her mate? Will Elena discover the secret behind why she doesn't have wings? Will Lillie ever gain control over her powers? And most importantly, will their forbidden friendship be able to withstand all the challenges it will face? Together with her friends, she defies expectations and embraces her destiny as not just a leader but as a fiercely independent woman who will shape her own fate.

Isang babaeng kinatatakokotan ng kahit sinong tao na makabangga niya dahil sa angking galing nito sa pakikipagtunggali--- Nathalie Collins. Isang mahusay na NBI Agent, dahil lahat ng misyong ibinibigay sa kaniyan ay walang kahirap-hirap niyang nalutas. Ngunit sa kaniyang puso ay nakapaloob ang lungkot at paghihiganti upang mabigyan ng katarungan ang mga magulang na basta na lang pinatay ng taong hindi niya kilala. Sa patuloy niyang paghahanap sa mga kriminal na pumaslang sa pamilya niya, ay unti-unti namang lumalambot ang puso niya sa babaero niyang boss na si Frank Smith. Para sa kanya ay kailangan niyang sumipilin ang kaniyang puso lalo na at alam ni Natalie na sa bandang huli ay siya pa rin ang uuwing luhaan. Ngunit hanggang kailan niya kayang paglabanan ang pag-ibig na nadarama para kay Frank? At may pag-asa pa kayang makamit ng mga magulang ni Natalie ang hustisyang nararapat para sa pamilya?

I was a regular interior designer until my life took a whirlwind turn when I was hired to renovate the luxurious property of Ethan Blackwood, a powerful billionaire with a reputation for being ruthless and cold. Our first encounter was a clash of wills, with Ethan acting like an arrogant asshole, and me, trying to maintain my composure to keep the job. But beneath his tough exterior, I sensed an undeniable attraction between us. Despite my resolution to stay away from him, fate seemed to draw us together. But just as we started to build something real, a dark secret from my past resurfaced, threatening to destroy everything.

'Pandai bukan syarat menjadi seorang pelajar terunggul, tetapi keperibadian seseorang pelajar itu.' Kisah kehidupan seorang remaja bernama Zain bersama rakan-rakannya yang baru sahaja menginjak usia remaja. Dikala itu, Adrian yang cemburu terhadap Zain menyebabkan dia telah merencana pelbagai strategi untuk mengenakan Zain supaya dia dapat menggondol populariti 'musuh'nya itu. Tetapi, adakah ianya akan berjaya? Bagaimanakah Zain mampu menghadapinya? (Blurb bahagian 1)

Cindy and Catherine are twins but even though they are twins they have own differences for example their attitude. Cindy is a shy type girl but very smart while Catherine is smart too but not like cindy. Catherine likes to rebel and she's a bad girl type and when she meets Theo. They become friends but an accident change all of it. The moment I met Cindy in our school, I knew that she's the one for me or she's speacial. She became my first love, but we lived 100 miles apart. After the school, we maintained our friendship through handwritten poems. Eventually, car accident ruined it all. We went on to seperate lives, yet I thought about her always. Ten years later, we reunited in our college school which is Stanford university. I fell in love with my friend. Yes I'm the one who's giving her a yellow flower with a red tip because it symbolizes friendship or falling in love with your friend. There is nothing wrong with that but do you know what's the hardest part of being in love? You need to sacrifice all of your dreams just to be with that girl. One thing I realise. "Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option."

Kita tidak pernah tahu kemana takdir akan membawa kita. Yang pasti, takdir akan mendekatkan kita dengan jodoh kita. Andini Khumaira, seorang gadis yang bercita-cita ingin menjadi Tahfiz Qur'an. Namun, tekadnya mulai diuji ketika cinta terhadap lawan jenis mulai bersemi di hatinya. Memilih dan memilah kumbang yang datang dan pergi. Akankan Dini mempertahankan cita-citanya? Atau malah terbuai dengan manisnya cinta?

Getting married should be one of the wishes humans tend to make, especially to be with the one they love, right? But what happens when a human wishes for nothing in his or her life, but wealth, and nothing else, not even happiness? Meet Emma Maxwell, a twenty five years old wealthy lady, who had been broken many times, because of love, and for that, she vowed to never fall in love again. Like every other person, Emma had always wished to know the feelings of love, to give and to get it in return, but relationship never seemed to be her thing, as she always ended up being the victim of one sided love. After trying series of relationship, without any, working out for her, she decided to give up on love, and started sleeping around with men. As she always said to any man that approaches her for love "that shit ain't for me, I just wanna get laid, and we go our separate ways. But what happens, when her parents, especially her mom, desperately wants her to get married, and not just getting married, but to her friend's son? Do you think she'll agree to it?....

Zane is a werewolf and his planet was destroyed by vampires. His mother sent him to Earth, the planet of humans, just before their planet was destroyed. Zane was a young werewolf and he didn't know how to survive on his own, in a planet of humans, but then, he found an orphanage and his life changes

Love does not appear with any warning signs. You fall into it as if pushed from a high diving board. No time to think about what’s happening. It’s inevitable. An event you can’t control. A crazy, heart-stopping, roller-coaster ride that just has to take its course. Hazel was rejected by someone she loved and was told that he would be engaged to her deadly foe. In great despair, she went to a bar and met this handsome guy (Zac). They drank a lot and played games. Under the influence of alcohol, they got married. However when they came back to her senses, they decide to make things right, but it's hard to get a divorce now because she wants to use the dramatic yet genuine marriage to keep her proud in front of her deadly foe. Zac on the other hand was the future heir to one of the richest and prosperous families. Although he was endowed with an otherworldly handsomeness, he was known to be as cold as ice and had a natural dislike for women although they always craved after him like bees to a honey pot. But for some unknown reason, he finds something unique about Hazel which he can’t explain. Perhaps, it were her eyes which were limpid and pure like autumn water and sparkled like azure pools in the morning sunlight… Would it be possible that they fall in love with each other in the future? Take part in this amazing piece, and experience a story filled with various mysteries and incredible twists as she uncovers the mysteries surrounding Zac who decides to hide his identity and tremendous background in order to win her heart genuinely.