Hilarious Sarcasm Quotes

Summer is here which means one thing for Allison Brooke and her friends, the Hawaiian trip they've all been planning since they were freshmen. Allison thinks this is just another boring school trip but with new friends along the way, bitchy queen bees, fun pranks and a haunting past, Allison’s life is about to be filled with what her life lacked for the 18 years of her life; drama. Add a sweet Asian guy, some bloody rude hottie to the picture, and you can say Allison really is ready for an hilarious summer romance.

In the labyrinth of a tumultuous marriage, Hazel Stewart had grown accustomed to the biting edge of Benjamin Lucas's sarcasm, weathered the storm of his recurrent divorce threats, and reluctantly tolerated his secret liaison. For three long years, she believed she could navigate this tempest indefinitely. Then, a twist of fate brought an unexpected life into the equation—Hazel found herself pregnant with a child Benjamin vehemently disowned. In a moment of despair, Hazel inked the divorce agreement, seeking an escape from the toxic bond. Little did she anticipate that leaving would be the beginning of a haunting chase. While she hoped to vanish into the shadows of separation, Benjamin, refusing to accept defeat, became an enigmatic pursuer, leaving Hazel to wonder if her liberation came at the cost of a relentless, ominous pursuit.

SLOANE HOLBROOK is a thirty-five-year-old copywriter whose only commitment is to sarcasm, but every major holiday turns her into a single, pitiful spectacle for her judgmental family. Her solution? JACKSON, a charming, commitment-phobic Australian golf coach who needs a distraction just as badly as she does. They forge the "Holidate Pact" a year-long contract to be each other’s flawless, platonic plus-ones for every major event, with one rigid rule: zero feelings. But when a New Year's Eve kiss designed for public consumption feels startlingly real, Sloane and Jackson realize surviving the holiday calendar is easy; surviving the relentless, rule-breaking, undeniable attraction might be impossible. They signed up for a cynical transaction, but what happens when their fake relationship becomes the most honest thing in their lives?

"As what?" I asked with sarcasm evident in my voice. "As my sex slave," Matteo Russo said, and I choked. I didn't just choke but I laughed out my heart. This had to be a joke. Laura Vento never got anything from her parents, except being sold to Antony Brown to pay off a debt. Her only chance of freedom is to pay off the money. Laura has a plan, to work her ass off so she can be free. Everything was going smoothly until she met the notorious mafia leader Matteo Russo, whose reputation precedes him. Matteo is a man with no emotions but when he meets Laura- The gorgeous red headed stripper, he knew he has to have her- no matter the cost

Naratria Abiyaksa-Si tomboy yang mempunyai julukan preman pasar- saking gaharnya-baru saja memergoki pacarnya berselingkuh dengan Karina Winardi-calon kakak iparnya sendiri. Ternyata kata-kata Altan-sahabat oroknya telah terbukti, "Laki-laki ganteng itu kalo nggak gay ya, brengsek.Termasuk gue!" Itu adalah quotes favoritnya yang 100% benar! Sementara itu, Adzan Akbar Dewangga yang pernah kecewa akibat dikhianati kekasihnya, beranggapan bahwa wanita itu adalah makhluk yang egois dan manipulatif. Mengapa? Karena walaupun mereka salah, mereka akan tetap menyalahkan dunia. Saking muaknya berurusan dengan wanita, julukan gay pun kerap ditujukan padanya. "Gue heran ngeliat penampakan lo. Dibilang gembel ... ya, lo anak orang kaya. Tapi ngeliat celana bolong-bolong dan jaket penuh paku lo, kayak-kayaknya lo nggak pantes jadi anaknya Om Aksa dan Tante Lia. Lo ini lebih mirip landak dari pada manusia." -Adzan Akbar Dewangga "Gue malah lebih heran ngeliat lo. Ganteng-ganteng doyan batangan. Nggak sayang tuh, sama perabotan kalo terus dipake laga pedang?" - Naratria Abiyaksa

Suhayr Imraan Khalid is the definition of hotheaded sassy lady filled with bags of sarcasm, a real badass. Her small clothing brand passed down to her by her mother is about to get demolished so she took a drastic step to earn more than she's lost. She got married to the person claiming to want her shop. The infuriated wealthy man have the audacity to offer some cash for her to give up her own company. Worst of all, the government are behind his decision like the leeches they've always been. They hated her anyway, there is no way they are going to support her. She married him to make his life a living hell and damn right she did so but then, she got messed into some unknown emotions rendering her weak.

Lara Dela Cruz was a normal girl—well, normal in the sense that she was an overworked call center agent who hated her boss, loved iced coffee, and had mastered the art of sarcasm to survive the horrors of capitalism. But one night, while rushing home, she slipped on a puddle (thanks to her horrible luck) and hit her head hard on the pavement. When she woke up… she wasn’t in her world anymore. Instead, she found herself in a medieval kingdom, in the middle of a chaotic slave auction. And before she could even scream in protest, she was bought by the most feared man in the entire empire—Duke Alistair Von Nacht, also known as the Tyrant Duke. Now, instead of dealing with rude customers, she had to deal with an emotionally constipated warlord who could kill her with a flick of his fingers. But what’s worse? She might be falling for the grumpy tyrant.

Readers said. 'Very funny, I needed cold showers! I dropped my tablet in the bath! Totally original. Outrageous. The goddesses thread is totally original.' Goddesses - is this what 50 Shades should have been about? Connie Grimshaw, is now a successful businesswoman in an international consultancy. She reached these dizzy heights by believing her mother - work hard and reject emotional needs. On a business trip, the dam bursts and her libido refuses to be silenced. Her PA (Dee) helps her reconcile her lascivious feelings by using a series of parables from ancient goddesses. This works until the goddesses land her in hilarious, embarrassing and sometimes, dangerous situations as she develops the vamp in herself. But there are forces at work, which try to mismanage her feelings. Can she defeat the bad boys? Firstly, she has to deal with Greg, the evil misogynist.

"Wait let me get this straight, you want me to get fat?" Cara does not know if she should be offended or threatened. Was this his grand plan to make her pay for the scene she caused? It's nuts. "Pregnant, so yeah," "You are going cuckoo, I am leaving." "A million dollars which you can use for payment of your mum's treatment and the rest, I don't care what you do with it." Cara stops to she process his words. ~~~ What happens when the billionaire meets one of the craziest girl on the planet? Well, for sure there's gonna be; Publicity stunts, hilarious arguments, living together Fake relationship, surrogacy, sex and many more. But is there gonna be love? There's only one way to find out..... WARNING: THIS STORY CONTAINS MATURE THEMES AND GRAPHIC LANGUAGES, READ AT YOUR OWN RISK!!! Cover by: @quirksofchole

Waking up with boobs, beauty, and deadly lightning powers wasn’t on Abby’s bingo card—but then again, neither was dying of a terminal illness and reincarnating as a bullied noblewoman in a magical kingdom. Now Lady Abby MacMayer has one goal: live loud, live free, and never be a victim again. With a sword in one hand and sarcasm in the other, she shocks the realm—literally—and catches the eye of the kingdom’s most powerful and brooding mage, Duke Alaric. He’s duty. She’s chaos. He trains her to control her power. She ruins his peace of mind. The sparks? Not just magical. But when a war brews, a dungeon rift opens, and a prophecy threatens the man she loves, Abby vanishes in battle… only to return years later with no memory and no magic. Everyone believes she’s lost. Only the queen knows she remembers everything—and is hiding the truth to protect Alaric from a fate worse than heartbreak. Lightning may strike twice... but love? Love will burn through time, lies, and destiny itself.