I'd Rather Feel Pain Than Nothing At All Novels & Stories

The day before the spacecraft launch, I am anonymously reported for concealing a mental illness and lose my qualification to board. After being confined in a psychiatric hospital for three years, my husband, Simon Bergman, who is now a decorated figure in the aerospace field, personally brings me home. "I had no choice but to send you there. I even applied to be demoted just to bring you back. Let's just live our lives well from now on," Simon says. Burdened by guilt for affecting his career, I spend the rest of my life carefully taking care of him and busying myself in the kitchen as a dutiful wife. But before I die, my daughter finds the letter accusing me of having a mental condition—it is written in my husband's own hand. She also discovers decades of correspondence between him and a deceased war buddy's widow named Charmaine Marlowe. In those letters, he writes that to fulfill his buddy's dying wish to take care of Charmaine, he fabricates a false mental illness record and inserts it into my astronaut application. As a result, I was sent to the psychiatric hospital, and my position was taken by her. The glass shatters, and the sharp fragments pierce me, like they are stabbing into my heart. I was supposed to be the one to go to space. But my husband sacrificed my chance so that another woman could have it! I die in despair. When I open my eyes again, I am back on the day of the astronaut selection for the manned spacecraft launch. This time, when Simon offers to help submit my application, I refuse to let him.

What are the odds that you are dared to send a random text to a stranger? And, what are the odds that the stranger happens to be someone you would never have imagined in your wildest fantasies?Well, the odds are in Chloe's favor. A text conversation which starts as a dare takes a one eighty degree turn when the person behind the screen turns out to be the cockiest, most arrogant, annoying asshat. Despite all this; the flirting, the heart to heart conversations and the late night musings are something they become accustomed to and something which gradually opens locked doors...but, that's not all. To top it all off, the guy just might happen to be in the same school and have a reputation for a overly skeptical identity..."What are you hiding?""An awesome body, beneath these layers of clothing ;)"But, who knows what Noah is really hiding and what are the consequences of this secret?Cover by my girl @messylilac :)❤️

"Does my son fuck you this good? No? Then take this dick like the good girl you are." My father-in-law had me bent over the kitchen counter, hand clamped over my mouth to muffle my moans, while his son—my husband—called my name from upstairs... *** You think you know what you're getting into? You don't have a fucking clue. This isn't some tasteful romance where the camera pans away. This is the raw, uncut, NC-17 version of your filthiest 3 AM fantasies—the ones you'd never admit to anyone, not even yourself. We're talking Daddies who don't ask permission because you already gave it with those desperate eyes. Men old enough to be completely off-limits but experienced enough to make you forget your own name. They'll bend you over their desk, fuck you silent at family dinner, and make you call them Daddy while reminding you how young, and tight you are. Trigger warnings? Everything here is designed to trigger you. Age gaps that'll get you disowned. Rough hands leaving fingerprint bruises on your hips. Choking that blurs your vision while he calls you his perfect little slut. Public sex in places you'll never see the same way. Getting passed around because one man isn't enough. These men don't make love—they fuck, claim, own. They'll use every hole like it belongs to them because it does. Degrade and worship you in the same breath. Call you their dirty girl while balls deep making you scream. Now be a good girl, turn the fucking page, and let Daddy show you what you've been missing.

They were my brother’s best friends—the HawkThorne brothers. Wealthy, ruthless, and filthy enough to make the whole city drop to its knees. I was the good girl once. The perfect wife. Until my husband had sex with half my office and shoved me into an open marriage I never asked for. One night at a bar was supposed to be my rebellion—a dirty little secret to make me forget. I never expected to run into them. Six years had made them look harder, darker, and so much hotter. I shouldn’t have let them touch me. Shouldn’t have let them ruin me against a bathroom sink with their filthy mouths and rough hands. Three men. One night. No promises. But the eldest HawkThorne pressed a card into my palm before I could slip away. I thought I could handle them. Thought I could survive their obsession. Now I’m learning there’s no such thing as just sex with the HawkThorne brothers. They don’t share. They claim. They corrupt. And they’re coming for every last filthy piece of me.

Everyone in New York knew that Don Lorenzo Capone loved his wife dearly. At the height of our love, he shielded me from a bullet that went straight through his chest. The hospital issued eleven critical condition notices. I cried myself hoarse at the door of the emergency room. "Lorenzo, don't you dare die on me, or I'll instantly find a pretty boy to marry and have children with!" He survived the ordeal, and the first thing he did when he opened his eyes was to marry me. After the marriage, he ruled over New York's largest underground empire with an iron fist, but never allowed any woman to get close to him. On our third wedding anniversary, I went to his private dock to give him a surprise. There, I saw him holding a pair of twins, teaching them how to shoot. The man who could kill without batting an eye was looking at the children with eyes full of affection. The children's mother was Elena Tribbiani, the daughter of an arms dealer who was his equal. "Lorenzo, what if Vivian finds out?" Lorenzo dismissed it casually. "A fragile porcelain doll like her is only fit to be displayed in a glass case. Only a she-wolf like you is worthy of bearing my family's cubs." It turned out, what I thought was true love was merely a carefully-woven lie. I did not confront him. Instead, I sent a text message to an FBI special agent. "Agent Smith, I have a list of the arms deal you’re investigating."

Nelly Robinson stood at a crossroads, burdened by her grandmother’s escalating hospital bills and the profound grief of losing her only support. The weight of the circumstances pressed down on her, leaving her with no choice but to take action. With determination in her heart, she made the difficult decision to drop out of college, a bold step fueled by the urgent need for financial stability and independence. As she began her new life as a waitress at a bustling restaurant, she quickly learned that the job was rife with challenges. The clatter of dishes and the cacophony of voices surrounded her as she navigated the often turbulent waters of demanding customers, each interaction testing her patience and resolve. Then, fate intervened in the form of Jason Wilson, a commanding presence who exuded confidence and charisma. His sharp suit and piercing gaze made it clear that he was a force to be reckoned with in the world of business. After a one night stand with her, he presented her with an unexpected yet compelling offer—a marriage contract—Nelly's heart raced with a mix of excitement and apprehension. At that moment, she understood that her life was on the brink of a breathtaking transformation, one that promised to shatter her current reality and open doors to new adventures filled with both challenges and opportunities. What awaits her as she marries the wealthy CEO, especially when she starts receiving death threats from his parents' favored bride, Diana? What will happen when she discovers that she is the missing heir to the Robinson’s Enterprise?

Celeste Lodge has been married to Terence Ford for three years. He's hated her guts the whole time. The day Winona Ford returns, he finally can't take it anymore and begins planning to fake his death so he can run away with her. "I'll fake my death in one month. I'll give up my position as heir to the Ford family and be with Winona forever." Hearing this from outside the operating room, Celeste Lodge immediately contacts a lawyer to draft divorce papers. Then, she calls her brother, Hayden Lodge, who lives abroad. "Hayden, I'm done with Terence. I'm ready to leave and live overseas with you."

To prevent the merfolk from being slaughtered, I decided to go ashore and seduce my childhood friend Cyrus, who had become the Alpha King. He still loved me deeply, and we spent three passionate days and nights together in bed. Waking up from a haze of pleasure, I hadn't even had the chance to rejoice before a corrosive elixir was dunked over my head. Listening to my pained wails, Cyrus smirked. "So even an immortal mermaid can feel pain, too? "Well, this is just a taste of what's to come if you don't tell me where my parents are!" Yes, he was convinced that the merfolk were behind his parents' disappearance. From then on, I was forced to watch him flirt with his mistress, Emily; had to extract my mermaid pearl to help heal her body; was forced to dance barefoot to entertain Emily so that she could sleep… Cyrus hated every fiber of my being, yet always held me tenderly in his arms whenever I was on the brink of death, carefully feeding me medicine. Sometimes, he was cruel. "Do you think I'll go easy on you just because I love you? Quick, continue torturing her!" Sometimes, he was gentle. "Can't you be good and tell me where my parents are?" Silently, I endured his twisted love without a word. Soon, however, these days would come to an end, and I wouldn't have to keep that secret any longer. After all, a mermaid who did not return to the sea after three years on land… Would turn into seafoam. And now, there were only three days until my time was up.

During the heatwave apocalypse, I didn't die due to the heat, nor did I die in a conflict. My younger sister, Amber Carter, has a "heart of gold" by nature. She couldn't bear to see the people suffering in the apocalypse, so she gave away all the food in our cellar. After we ran out of food, Amber forced me to go look for food outside in the heat. That was how I died—from the heat outside. In this lifetime, I'm going to enjoy my ice-cold watermelon while watching Amber dig her grave with her own hands.

Lina Watson works hard to support herself and pay for her college degree in Literature. When she thinks her life is finally getting back on track, she discovers that her boyfriend, Noah Perry, is just playing her. Resentful, Lina decides to use a mysterious and unknown man to get revenge and gets mixed up with the biggest mafia gangster in New York, the Don of Cosa Nostra, Vincenzo Bonaccorso. "A kiss and nothing more?" Really? Or is this unusual request just the beginning of a beautiful love story?