If He Had Been With Me Book

For five years, I was married to the heir of the Romano family, Italy's biggest crime family. Every night, he'd hold me and whisper, "Just give me an heir, and I'll give him the entire Romano empire." But I never got pregnant, and the Don's disappointment in me grew with every passing month. Until I found out my husband had been secretly swapping my folic acid for birth control pills. I was still reeling from the fury when I saw a post from his ex-girlfriend: an ultrasound photo. Her caption was sweet and smug: “Ten weeks along. Vincent said he can’t wait to meet the baby.” Seeing the flood of congratulations, my mind was made up. I found the contact info for my ex-boyfriend—the one who’d spent the last five years trying to get me back. I sent him a single text. 【Give me one month. Then I’m coming with you.】

After my husband's death, I retained all his personal accounts and our marriage certificate. Since then, Chuck Smith had been wooing me persistently, declaring that he would give me all his love to overcome the pain of loss. He would search the entire city for some sweets that I mentioned on a whim, and he deleted every woman's number from his phone while keeping me updated on his location in real time. But just as his feelings reached me, and I was ready to marry him, I found Chuck getting frisky with his new secretary in the basement parking lot…

I vowed to transfer schools with my childhood friend when he claimed he was being bullied. But the day before we were to finalize the transfer, he backed out. His friend teased him. "Man, you faked being a punching bag just to get rid of Alice Wiley? That's cold. You two have been thick as thieves since forever. Are you really cool with her going to a new school alone?" Shane Page brushed it off. "It's just another high school across town. Not a big deal. I'm tired of her always being up my ass. This works out perfectly." I stood frozen outside the door for a long time. Finally, I turned and walked away. On the transfer form, I crossed out Oatheport High and filled in the international academy my parents had been pushing for. Everyone seemed to forget that Shane and I were never equals.

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I was chosen to be the fiancée of Lorenzo, the Mafia’s heir. But at a family gala, Lorenzo was openly pursued by Chiara, the daughter of an arms dealer. Chiara wasn’t like the other rule-abiding debutantes.She tore through the streets in a modified sports car, used a military-grade combat knife to cut her cigars, and drank the harshest whiskey neat.There was an untamed wildness about her, a fire Lorenzo couldn’t look away from. He complained to the family elders, “How can a woman like that possibly be our Madre and run this entire family?” His words dripped with disdain for her recklessness, yet his eyes were glued to her, tracking her every move as she raised her glass. Then, on Lorenzo’s birthday, he announced his intention to make Chiara his mistress. Chiara refused.”The women of my family are wives, never mistresses.And my husband’s heart must belong only to me.” Lorenzo came to me, his voice hesitant.”Alessia, it’s just a title.I need you to give it to Chiara.Please? She doesn’t understand our family’s traditions, and she’s making a scene about marrying me.We just need to pacify her for now.Even if she marries me, you will still be the one to manage the family’s affairs.” As I stood trying on my wedding gown, a sharp crystal bead on the bodice pierced my finger.A single drop of blood bloomed against the pure white satin. The dress was ruined, but the wedding would go on. Since he chose someone else to be his wife, I will become his Madre.

• • • FOR ADULT READERS ONLY • • •️️️ I shouldn’t have wanted him. Not when he was older. Not when he was untouchable. Not when he was my father’s best friend. Not when he belonged to a world I was never meant to step into. But I did. I was five years old when I decided he was mine. Standing at his wife’s graveside in the rain, I held his face with my little hands and told him I would grow up and be his. He said: Is that right. Not a question. So I kept my word. Adrian Keller. My father's best friend. The man who watched me grow. The man who built an empire on control. The man no one touches. The man I wasn’t supposed to want. For thirteen years, I loved him the only way I was allowed to. In silence. At a distance. Across rooms that belonged to our families — not to what I was carrying. Until the night I turned eighteen. I said it out loud. He shut it down in one word: “Don’t.” So I did. I stopped looking at him. I stopped wanting him. I stopped being the girl who built her entire world around a man who would never choose her. I walked away. That should have been the end. It wasn’t. Because the moment I stopped reaching for him, was the moment Adrian Keller started looking for me. Across rooms. Across tables. At midnight — staring at a name he shouldn’t want. The man who taught me control is starting to lose his. And this time… He’s not asking. And underneath the empire, Underneath the discipline, Underneath fifteen years of unshakable control— Something ruinous is coming loose.

“Is it really impossible for you to love me? Even a little?” I sounded desperate. His lips curled into a mocking grin. “Love you? Don’t be ridiculous. I would never love a desperate woman like you. Amanda’s my everything. And you? You are nothing.” *** Angel Elowyn Montero and Gideon Elwood were once good friends until marriage ruined everything they had. To Gideon, she was the reason his life was ruined and the reason the woman he loved never returned. Their marriage was loveless and detached. Despite everything, she held on to the hope that he would eventually love her too. His family, except for his parents, despised Angel as well. In the mansion, she was treated worse than a servant by his siblings, who bossed her around and even hurt her physically. Until one day, she finally had enough. She grew tired of hoping for a love that would never be reciprocated. So, when her husband handed her divorce papers again, she did not think twice and signed them. Only after she was gone did Gideon realize his own feelings. He loved her far more than he had ever allowed himself to admit. But by then, it was too late. He no longer knew where his ex-wife was. Years later, she returned. Angel was no longer the fragile woman who endured everything for the sake of love. She came back as someone entirely different: fierce, bold, independent. Now, the tables had finally turned. He loved her, and he was determined to win her back.

My billionaire husband suffered from chronic insomnia for years. Only the sleep balm I made could help him sleep. On the night of our seventh wedding anniversary, his childhood sweetheart poured a basin of scalding water over the old camphor tree in our garden. I wept and tried to save the tree as she apologized, “I didn’t know you used its leaves to make the sleep balm.” My husband gently comforted her and ordered his men to tie me to the tree trunk instead. “What a precious tree. You’ll spend the rest of your days with it!” With my wrist fractured as a result, I filed for divorce immediately. A month later, my husband was unable to sleep late one night. He stood in the garden and stared at the withered camphor tree.

"I’m a good girl—until I got drunk in Vegas and married a panties-flaming-hot Irishman. Oops. I’ve always lived my life by the rules. Unlike my two sisters, I’m the good one. The responsible one. Going outside my comfort zone is when I wear red lipstick before five PM. That comfort zone of mine? It’s smashed to smithereens on a wild night in Las Vegas when I met—and married—Liam Gallagher. After one shot of tequila, then two, then too many to count, a good girl’s rules tend to disappear. And so do her panties, and her bra, and various other articles of clothing when she’s with an Irishman who knows his way around a woman’s body. Now my husband wants us to stay married. For six months. He says it’ll be worth my while. Considering our chemistry underneath the sheets, I can’t say that he’s wrong. Liam isn’t safe, though. Liam definitely isn’t comfortable. He’s like the male equivalent of wearing red lipstick in the daytime all wrapped up in an irresistible, dangerous package. Yet this stubborn Irishman isn’t about to let me go, drunken Princess Bride-themed Vegas wedding or no. Now I have to decide if I’m brave enough to break the rules for love."

Anna Whitmore dated Lucas Caldwell, a young heir from New York’s old-money circle, for three years. When the time was right, she decided to reveal who she truly was and formally proposed a strategic marriage. On the day she planned to propose, he made an excuse and walked away. That same night, he was seen at a nightclub, arms wrapped around another woman, openly mocking the idea of marrying someone “without status or value.” Anna saw his true face and walked away for good. If marriage in their world had always been a transaction, then choosing a man with greater power and influence was only fair. So she married his uncle. Later, on the day Lucas Caldwell announced his engagement to the daughter her father chose to acknowledge, he saw her at the banquet. The so-called “unfavored” Whitmore heiress. His former girlfriend. She stood beside his uncle under the spotlight, smiling— calm, radiant, untouchable. The man next to her was the one who truly controlled New York’s upper circle, a level of power Lucas Caldwell would never reach. His uncle spoke lightly, and the entire room fell silent. “She is my wife.”