Seared Into My Brain Novels & Stories

The next day I was having breakfast quietly until I remembered that I had a neighbor to avoid, the event of the previous night invaded my brain and I couldn't help but feel ashamed. I didn't want to remember anything about what happened, but my brain was a specialist, forgetting the important things and repeating as a scratched disc the biggest shames of my life. And if it was shame, last night I had broken a new record.

The excruciating pain in his head made him squint. However, at that moment, a series of memories entered his brain forcefully. Yes, finally a day like this came too. Nicholas' memories finally returned to their rightful place.

I’ve always been close to my family, but now, it’s like there’s a wall between us, something unspoken that’s driving us apart. Every time I try to recall more, the pain in my head worsens, as if my brain is actively resisting the memories. It’s like there’s a door in my mind that’s locked tight, and every attempt to open it sends waves of agony through me. I want to remember, to fill in the gaps, but I’m terrified of what I might find on the other side of that door. What if the truth is more than I can handle? What if it changes everything?

I couldn’t even get out of bed. I sat up slowly, wrapping the blanket around myself as if that would shield me from the memories clawing at my mind. My eyes stared straight ahead, but all I could see was what happened last night. The image wouldn’t leave me. It played over and over again, clear as day, refusing to fade. The sound of gunshots. The scent of blood. The cold, lifeless bodies. I squeezed my eyes shut and shook my head as if that would help. It didn’t. The images were burned into my brain, replaying like a broken record.

I’m drowning in it, suffocating under the weight of it. And then, the image of my father with Bahar, together in a bed, tangled in sheets. I try to deny it. I try to push it away, but it’s no use. It’s burned into my mind, over and over again, like a twisted, broken record. I can’t unsee it. I can’t escape it. I close my eyes, but the image is still there, vivid and clear. I can’t stop it from playing in my mind, from repeating itself like a song that never ends.

The device slammed into my forehead. I felt a burning pain as a portion of the flesh beneath the cup was flash-fried away. More pain, then a little pressure and finally nothing. In those seconds before my mind spun out of control, I had the oddest sensation there was something inside my brain. Searing agony - existence lost all meaning and I was gone. (One week later)

Why didn’t I take it down with me? Why didn’t I REMEMBER IT?! Well, if we’re going to be fair, I had just had my brain turned to jelly by the hottest sex in my life. (Up to that point. It got even hotter a few hours later.) And then I’d suffered the worst freakout I’d ever had (again, up to that point) because I had realized I’d just had that mind-blowing sex in the boardroom of the company where I worked. I had been panicked beyond belief, with my brain already no better than jelly –

The way her lips curled when she smirked, the look in her eyes, and the sound of her moans —it was like every little detail of her was burned into my damn brain. The craziest part? I made myself relive that moment over and over again. I didn’t try to stop those thoughts. I welcomed them. “Come on man!” I heard a voice behind me. “Can’t you drive faster?” I heard a voice say behind me and I realized I had been driving slowly. I have been so stuck in my head that I didn’t even notice. “I’m sorry,” I said pressing the accelerator. I increased my pace and once again I allowed myself to drown in thoughts about Alison.

Snow After the seizure, my nerves were upset. Intrusive thoughts were a major problem. I kept thinking about the words the man had said to me. They kept repeating in my head like an infinite loop, which made me nervous in the face of not knowing. It was killing me that I was a target for someone without understanding why.

I pressed the heels of my palms into my eyes, trying to keep them out, but it was useless. He was there. Burned into my brain like a brand. It wasn't right, it was still also hard to believe. It wasn't fucking right. I stood up, prowling around the room like a caged animal, kicking splintered glass aside. Every motion I took only forced the fury bubble larger inside me, flush against my ribcage so that I could feel I might explode. Like the night Ciara had died all over again. God. Ciara. I lurched back onto the couch, propping my head in my hands as recollections shredded me apart.