Twin Moon
But I can’t ignore the pain anymore.
I wish I could breastfeed them. During my breakdown, when I stopped eating or talking, or just existing, I lost too much weight. Even after giving birth to twins, I am sickly thin. My body just isn’t strong enough to produce the milk. I hate myself for it. I feel like I have not only deprived my children of this important nutritional dietary need, but I have also deprived myself of that special bonding moment. No one ever tells you about all the gross stuff that comes after birth. All the bleeding and the hormones, the fear of spontaneously pooping my pants or pissing myself. I never worried about that before. Not to mention the exhaustion. Maybe it’s wor