Very Short Funny Quotes About Life

"You look tired and lazy. I think you're suffering from lack of vitamin me?" ~X~ Three words are enough to describe the playboy billionaire Alexis 'X' Montemayor who owns the very successful Club inside and outside the country. Hot. Dangerous. And oozing with sex appeal. He believed that he would never find the right woman for him despite having a random geisha in his very own Club-V. Not until a woman named Minzireth Paje entered his room and asked him if she is hired or not in the middle of what he called 'play time'. Lured by her sexy smile; piercing golden brown eyes; and voluptuous body, he hired her as his sex-retary. ***** Minzireth Paje is not your typical woman. Nagtungo sa siyudad upang maghanap ng trabahong makapag-aahon sa kanila sa kahirapan at matustusan ang gamutan ng kanyang magulang na may sakit. Ngunit nagbago ang lahat ng matanggap siya bilang sekretarya ng nagmamay-ari ng isa sa pinakasikat na Club sa Pilipinas. Buong akala niya'y more on paper works; answering calls; at tamang tayo lang sa gilid ng conference room ang kanyang gagawin. Not until her playboy boss, Alexis Montemayor demands her to do her assigned job. And that was to spice his night as his sex-retary. What if she found out what was her playboy boss's dark secret? Would she be able to fulfill her duty? Or resigned, and accept the fact that she is not qualified enough to be one of his sex-retary?

Everything happens for a reason sabi nga nila. Kung nasaksaktan ka, bumitaw ka na. Ang pagsuko ay hindi nagpapakita ng kahinaan, sadyang mga bagay lang na kailangan mo nang bitawan. Magiging okay din ang lahat, kung hindi man ngayon hintay lang sa tamang panahon. Learn to trust no one but yourself .Sometimes good things will fall apart so that better thing can fall together.... At a very young age, Saphirra Audrey Mendez is living her life alone. Two months after her mother died her father followed. She's left with nothing, no family, no relatives. With the desire to reach her dreams she learned how to juggle work and school. At the age of sixteen she managed to work hard to earn money in order for her to survive. She's happy with her island life but thinking of a bigger opportunity she left the place she once considered home. Until she met the handsome, the rich and famous and sought after bachelor of their generation, Vin Derick Valderama. Her quiet world turned upside down. She fell in love and got betrayed by the man who promised him forever. The man who always tell her, she's his soulmate and the man who made her fell for him so hard but in the end broke her heart into bits. He left her in the altar without saying anything but goodbye. With her will and determination to redeem herself she make a stand that she never will allow anyone hurt her again. Will she ever forgive the man who promised her forever? Will she allow herself to be the billionaire's soulmate again?

Bexan Ivanov witnesses a surprise terror attack during his 13th birthday and loses his father in the middle of the terror attack. A terrorist attempts to kill Bexan but fails because a heroic girl with a sniper saves him. Later Bexan knew, the heroic girl who saved him is actually an agent who works in a hidden agency, the unheard Onic Agency! Where undercover agents save the world in secret!Bexan felt immensely grateful towards the heroic girl who saved him from the brutal terrorist. After that, he decided to become an agent. Bexan was indebted to Onic so he pledged to give his full service to the said agency. Within 11 years, Bexan trained his ass off to become District 10's Supreme Commander and in order to do that, he has to get a hold of one of the biggest cases in Onic and that is terminating The Camorra Mafia Group.Bexan won't be handling this big time case alone. He will be assigned with a job partner, but wait a minute! Not just any job partner! Bexan becomes partners with a female agent who's a complete sloth. Lilith Divina helps Bexan with his first assignment in terminating the Camorra Mafia group. Bexan finds Lilith uncooperative with a drunken man's soul. Will their first assignment turn into a success? Or will it turn into a complete catastrophe?

Alexis Jenn Buenavista is a 24 year-old spoiled bratenilla girl from a rich, powerful,and famous family in the country. Partying all nights and drinking with her friends as if there's no tomorrow is her expertise. Working is not in her vocabulary. That's how she is... Until one day, her parents told her to marry the 38-year old, famous billionaire, Zac Rogen Walker. As a spoiled stubborn brat girl, ay lumayas siya sa kanila. But unfortunately, she was caught by Zac's bodyguard. She can't accept an old husband! Zac needs an heir for their company. His parents urged him to marry as he is not getting any younger. He chose Alexis because she is young and active which surely gives him an heir. The two signed a contract that gave Alexis the freedom to do anything she wanted but she cannot have sex with her boyfriend or any other man except with Zac. And their awkward married life has begun... Who will give in first to temptation? Who will give up? And who will fall in love?

Si Ivan Kim, isang mayaman at bilyonaryong CEO na nagmamay-ari ng hindi mabilang na hotel sa iba’t ibang bansa ay isa ding binata na hindi naniniwala sa pag-ibig at higit sa lahat.. sa KASAL. Si Ciela Luna Young, isang digital marketing assistant, breadwinner ng isang broken family. Isang dalagang pilit na nagsusumikap sa buhay upang patunayan ang kanyang sarili na karapat-dapat siyang pakasalan ng kanyang mayaman, perfectionist, soon to be lawyer at fiancè na si Jackson Chua. Ngunit isang hindi inaasahang pangyayari ang mag-uugnay sa kanilang dalawa. Ang cold hearted na CEO at hindi naniniwala sa pag-ibig at kasal ay aksidenteng maikakasal kay Ciela Luna isang gabi matapos silang pumunta sa wedding party ng kanilang mutual friend. Isang halik na magpapabago ng kanilang kapalaran. Ano ang mangyayari sa kanilang dalawa? Paninindigan kaya ni Ivan Kim si Ciela Luna? Matutuloy kaya ang kasal ni Ciela sa kanyang fiancè matapos ang nakagugulantang na balita? Abangan.

"Ang bodyguard ko pala ay isang Bilyonaryo!" Si Pristine Felize Vera Esperanza ay nag-iisang anak ni Pierre Vera Esperanza, isang bilyonaryo na kilalang-kilala sa larangan ng negosyo. Maraming tao ang nag-aakala na namumuhay siya tulad ng isang prinsesa, na mabait sa kaniya ang lahat at minamahal siya, ngunit ang katotohanan ay kabaligtaran nito. Her grandfather despises her when her parents suffered from car accident. Dahil doon ay matagal ang naging gamutan ng kaniyang ama na nagsanhi ng pagkalugi ng kanilang negosyo. Pristine has suffered from trauma because her mother died in that car accident and she was only five years old back then. Living in sadness, her life takes a turn when her father introduces Elijah Clementine Marasigan, her handsome bodyguard. He gave her a bodyguard because at the age of eighteen, she almost got herself killed. As the only child, and the successor, her father was terrified that something bad might happen to her. Indeed, something did happen, but for Pristine, it wasn't bad at all—she fell in love with Elijah. However, despite their mutual feelings, they cannot be together. Nais kasi ng kanyang lolo na ipakasal siya sa apo ng kaibigan nito. Isang mayamang lalaki at bilyonaryo na katulad ng kanilang pamilya, at hindi lamang isang bodyguard. Ano ang pipiliin ni Pristine? Susundin ba niya ang kagustuhan ng kanyang lolo o tatakas siya upang makasama ang kanyang minamahal?

Hindi alam ni Lia kung bakit napakamalas niya pagdating sa pag-ibig, twenty-eight years old na sya ngunit NBSB pa rin na maging ang mga taong nakapaligid sa kaniya ay nababahala na rin… Na nagtulak sa kaniya para pumasok sa isang night bar. “Don’t be nervous, Lia, matutuwa ka sa main event ng bar na ito!” Saad ng kaibigan niya habang nakatanaw sa entablado. Bago pa man makakibo si Lia at nagsimula ng maghiyawan ang mga babae sa paligid, isang lalaking naka-mask ang lumabas na tanging brief lamang ang suot. “The bidding will start now!” anunsyo ng MC sa gilid. “29 thousands!” Sigaw ng isang babae na nagpatahimik sa lahat. “29 thousands, going twice, going trice, wala na bang hahabol?” Muling tanong ng MC. Hindi alam ni Lia kung ano ang pumasok sa isip niya para itaas ang kamay, “30 thousand!” Sigaw niya bago pa man i-close ang bidding. “30 Thousand, the bidding is close! You’ll have one night with him!"

Celeste San Pedro, a typical senior-high school student of Hirokoshi High tends to live a normal life in Tokyo City, Japan with his older brother. Her life as a student was quite okay until she started to experience weird dreams with voices calling her in an unfamiliar name. She knew that the school library she used to visit every afternoon has something to do with this paranoia. And that she came across with an old and antique book which soon became a portal to an unexisting world. She lost herself in the city and woke up as a new being living in an old town of Gokayama. Growing with strange romantic feelings for each of the four main book characters, she almost forgot that she has her own real life too outside the book. Will she be able to return or will be forever miss her home?

Quinlee Velez has a wealthy but miserable life, despite of that she has a boy bestfriend who is one call away in times of distress and trouble. She always has things planned out to pursue and reach her dreams until one day she meets a guy named Zik, with a contract that ties the knot and who shatters her plans. Felt she was doomed to a life of extreme unhappiness. Marriage is normally one’s happily ever after in the movies but for them it’s a complete opposite of what other’s expect. Are they going to survive? Or ends in break-up and walk in separate ways? All right, let’s see!

Tyron! Oh my God, you're here!" agad niyakap ni Arabella ang asawa nang mabunguran ito sa sala. Almost one month na hindi niya ito nakita at sabik sabik siyang makita ulit. Mahigpit niya itong niyakap, ramdam din niya ang pagkasabik sa katawan nito ngunit nabigla siya nang bigla itong kumalas sa kanya, at kinuha ang nooy nakapatong na papel sa mesa. " You need to sign this", malamig na turan nito. Kinuha niya ang papel mula dito at di niya alam kung ano ang madarama. "Annulment paper!" hindi niya naiwasang maibulalas. "Yes" straight na sabi ni Tyron na tila ba punyal na sumaksak sa kanyang dibdib. Hindi makapaniwala si Arabella sa naririnig mula dito, she misses him so much and then ganito sasabihin nito pagdating? " Sabihin mong nagbibiro ka lang please", pagsusumamo niya, naninikip ang kanyang dibdib at para siyang aatekehin sa puso but Tyron remain cold and furious. "Diba sabi mo saakin mahal mo ako? Mahal na mahal kita, please don't do this to me, pls!", si Arabela na hindi na mapigilan ang pag -agos nang luha. Lumuhod siya sa harap ng asawa ngunit tila determinado ito sa kanyang sinabi. " I lied! look, I'd never love you. What I have said and done were all lies! ", galit na saad nito at halos bala ng baril na tumatama sa kanyang dibdib. Humagulgol siya sa narinig mula rito at hindi alam ang gagawin kundi humikbi. " Can't you see? I hate you very very much and I'll never ever inlove with you, can't you understand that?", sumisigaw si Tyron kung tinakpan na niya ang kanyang tainga. Subalit hiniwakan nito ang kanyang kamay at marahas na tinanggal sa kanyang pagkakatakip. " I hate you very very very much! ", sa halip ay saad nito na tila bombang sumabog sa kanyang pandinig.