Romans & histoires You're An Irredeemable Monster

I remembered her silence. I swore then, with the clarity only a traumatized child possesses, that I would never be him. I would be a monster, yes. I would be the “Walking Devil” of Las Vegas. I would burn empires and bury men in the desert. But I would never, ever lay a hand on a woman. So hearing Iris scream that I was a “beast,” a “pathetic liar,” and a murderer? It didn’t just irritate me. It felt like a glitch in my reality.

He felt ruined. Why would she still put up with someone like him? He felt like he didn't deserve it. "Monsters don't feel emotions. They don't feel guilty. They never want to get better. But, you're not a monster, Val. Everyone makes mistakes. You made a mistake, but you can redeem yourself. You have to stop beating yourself up. You're the strongest person I've ever met. I'm here with you now. I'm not going anywhere, Val. We're friends now" she said to him.

My attention to her is real but playful instead of lustful. "I'm sure your husband loved you," I respond, but Caleb won't hold off his trigger much longer. "You seem like the type that was well loved." “ I was well loved before I fell in with a monster. He told them I was a murderer. Can you imagine trying to tell an eight-year-old why he has to leave his mommy? I haven’t seen my son in sooo long. And when you pull that trigger, like I know you’re going to, I won’t ever see him again.” She is right that I will pull it.

His eyes darkened, like a pitch-black voids. “I’ve waited so long…so fucking long for the right moment and now that I’m out…” He leaned closer, his breath foul against my lips. “I’ll burn Velmora to the ground and every last parasite who dared to lock me away will beg for death.” “You’re insane,” I whispered, my voice trembling. “You’re not saving me or anyone, You’re just another monster.” That hit something in him—something raw and furious. “I’m not a monster,” he growled, his fangs lengthening. “I’m just a retribution and your blood….your pure little bloodline is what I need to stay sane, I won’t hurt you, I promise. Just let me have a little taste..”

A love that is real. He took a step nearer again, his face an impeccable mask of sorrow and love. "I know what it feels like to be alone. I know what it feels like to be a monster. I know what it feels like to be a weapon. I know what it feels like to be used." "You are not a monster." "I am. But so are you. You are a monster in the making. And they are going to make you into a monster. They are going to use you until you are a monster. And then they will cast you aside."

“Because I’m curious to know if you’re aware that rumors about him are in fact real, he did murder his own family or his father from what I observed, he’s a monster beyond any form of redemption.” I laughed at that statement of his. The irony of him calling someone a monster, someone better than him in all ways. “Beyond redemption?” I looked at him, caustically. “Wait dl you think you have a shot at redemption after all you did to me? You locked me up in a cell for days because I refuse to what? Apologize for calling you weak. And that’s just the tip of the iceberg you did to me.” I laughed again, and the reaction in his face tells me he got the memo.

“Daemon, Jade was only trying to help me; I told her to capture you, and I’m sorry.” He turned to me. “You thought I would be a monster, right?” “But you aren't, and we were all wrong. I was wrong.” “What if they aren’t? What if I am a monster?” “No, I see you now, and I know you could be a better person; my only mistake was giving up soon.”

" I stood up, pacing around the room. "What do you think they're gonna see me as, a monster! A murderer! Shit! " I curse, sitting back on the bed. " Maybe that's exactly what I am. I'm a monster. " " Hey, Miss, don't you ever say that about yourself. No one says you're a monster or a murderer, you are a human. I don't care how or what exactly is behind all this but I do know one thing for sure, you are no killer.

The towel in my hand is covered in red and around me are more bodies than I have ever seen. It hits me like a terrible baseball of truth right to the temple, I’m lost in my dreams again. Well, maybe memories? I have never really been able to distinguish what is truth and what is something my brain created to either make me feel better or hide the horror of the things I have done. I did this. I killed the people splayed on the ground around me…and they never stood a chance. Because I’m a monster. I’m a terrible unlovable monster. “I know what you are thinking, Magdalena,” The doctor says with her hands up in a non-threatening pose.

I needed to feed my monsters or there would be consequences. “Hi, handsome. Would you like some company?” I turned and saw an attractive blonde standing next to me. Perfect. I thought to myself. She wasn’t my usual but she would do. So I started my game again. Within thirty minutes she was walking out the door with me. We walked over to my car and I held the door as she climbed in. I smiled to myself as I climbed into the car and drove her to her death. This wasn’t how I wanted the night to end at least not with this woman but it would hold off my demons for now.