Chapter Eight- Laken

LAKEN

Jesus, help me because I don’t know if my heart can beat any harder without going into cardiac arrest. Blake is doing a good job of ruining every other man for me.

As I sit next to him in the car I can’t keep my mind off of that absolutely mind-blowing kiss. Hell, it was more than a kiss. That was like the joining of souls. I have never been more consumed by a kiss in my life. I felt like my body was going to combust, and I was about to climb him like a tree right there in my front yard.

And his words about getting his dick out tonight when he gets home... well, now that’s all I’m going to be thinking about when I get home tonight. It makes me hot just thinking about it right now!

Shit, don't think about it, Laken! At least not now. Wait till tonight then, you know....hello kitty. Oh, god, that was so corny that I embarrass myself.

Now, if my dad hadn’t been home then I would have went inside to change panties. I need to start keeping an extra pair in my purse for after I’ve been around Blake. He’s bad, bad, bad for my undies.

Why did Dad have to come home when he did? I just needed thirty more seconds and I could have gotten away without him knowing.

I honestly don’t know if what Blake said and done will cause me to have it worse when I get home or not. If he hasn’t passed out by then. Maybe he will be so drunk that he won’t remember. But that’s just probably wishful thinking on my part.

I don’t even want to go home now, but I have nowhere else to go. I’ve alienated myself from everyone around here because of him. I have no one now. Well, I do have Blake but I would never ask him to take me home with him. I’m not some weak-ass little girl who can’t take care of herself.

Plus, we haven't known each other very long and I would feel uncomfortable even bringing that subject up.

Uh, hey, can I go home with you? Because I'm afraid my dad is gonna beat my ass for you stepping up to protect me. I swear it's not just because I'm trying to get you out of your pants, and I'm so desperate that I'm using my bastard of a dad as an excuse.

Yeah, there is no way I'm asking to go home with him.

If dad beats me black and blue when I get home then I will take it and move on like I always do. Just because this man is making me weak in the knees doesn’t mean it’s changed who I am. I’m still strong and independent, and no man will ever make me any different. Especially Blake.

I should have stopped him from the moment he walked up. I should have demanded he meet me in town instead of him picking me up. It’s not a date for fuck’s sake! It wasn’t supposed to be anyways, and now my hormonal tongue went and said it was. Stupid, Laken. So stupid.

I could feel his body tensing without even looking at him earlier. He had rage vibes coming off of him like something fierce. I reached over to lay my hand on top of his, and I don’t even know why I did that. I was about to pull my hand away when I felt his hand turn over and his fingers thread with mine.

I had just gotten my heart rate down and he had it going up again. Dangerous man.

I’m getting in way over my head with him. He’s going to shred me to pieces, I just know it. I already live with a broken heart. Can a broken heart be broken even more?

Yes, it can. It can be shattered. Shattered to the point of not being able to be put back together. He’s probably not the type of guy to stick to one woman. Or like I said, he’s only after one thing, and after I give it up then he will drop me as everyone else has in my life.

Maybe after tonight, I should end this. Even the friendship. It’s too much of a risk. I’m not mentally stable enough to handle something like this. I don’t have time for something like this.

We pull into the parking lot of Dan’s Diner and I can’t hold back my smile. I haven’t been here in so long. It gives me equal parts hurt and joy being here.

“What’s that smirk for?” he asks.

“This is my favorite place to eat. Some of the only good memories I have were made here. Back when the world didn’t suck and my dad actually loved me,” I reply. Back when I wasn’t broken and the darkness wasn’t swallowing me whole.

He gets out of the car so I follow him. As soon as I shut the door and look at him I stop.

“What?” I ask. Shit, what did I do to make him look at me like that?

“Can you not wait till I get around to open your door?”

I’m stunned silent for a moment and can’t help the smile and chuckle that lets loose. This was definitely not something I was expecting from a guy like him. Maybe I’ve judged him too hastily.

“May I ask why you’re laughing?” he asks in a serious tone, but I see his lips twitch like he’s holding back a smile.

I just shrug my shoulders and say, “I’m just surprised is all. I didn’t picture you the type to open doors for a lady.”

He replies with a cheeky grin, “I wasn’t aware you were a lady.”

I swing my head his way, about to let loose on him when I see he’s got a smirk on his much too handsome face.

“You’re a jerk!” I yell and give him a good shove. I can’t hold my laughter back though. And it really does feel good to laugh. I haven’t laughed like this in a long time. It’s refreshing.

He walks faster so he can beat me to the door and opens it while saying with a bow, “My lady.”

My cheeks are hurting from smiling so much, and I don’t lose that smile when I see Dan standing at the front counter. He sees me and rushes over to me with a big smile for me as well.

Dan was my dad’s best friend growing up. He’s a big lumberjack-looking man with dark brown hair and a thick brown beard. He’s always wearing flannels shirts, and I’ve teased him endlessly about it over the years. He used to come to the house all the time, but after dad started drinking he hurt everyone in his life. Not just me.

He stole from Dan once, and Dan being Dan, he forgave him. But after the third time, he couldn’t take it anymore and told him to never show his face again. I don’t blame him for it. I wish I could say the same thing and it actually work.

I haven’t been here in a good six months so I haven’t seen my big lumberjack in a while. I didn’t realize how much I’ve missed him till just now. I need to start coming by more often, even if it’s just to say hi when I can’t afford to buy food here.

Dad keeps the money on him and I’m only given money for the grocery shopping. He keeps up with what I buy and spend. He has to make sure he has enough money for his daily booze. Insert internal eye roll here.

And I wouldn’t be surprised if he paid some money to the bar sluts. He’s such an ass they probably won’t blow him or bang him for free. Gross.

Dan rushes up to me and pulls me into a bear hug that has my feet dangling off of the ground. I laugh into his shoulder but it’s to cover up the tears that are threatening to fall. He smells like my childhood and his freshly baked pies. There’s no better combination.

“Laken, my girl! It’s so good to see you!” he exclaims in his deep rumbling voice.

“Put me down you big ass lumberjack!” I say through my laughter, knowing he’s going to hate that I called him that. Especially in public.

He puts me down but keeps his hands on my shoulders to get a good look at me.

“Still as beautiful as your mama, girl. Man, I’ve missed you. It’s been way too long since we’ve seen each other, and it doesn’t need to be that long before we see each other again.”

Before I can reply he sees Blake standing behind me and his cheerful smile falls off of his face. Uh oh. Not good. Here we go, red flags up. Surrogate dad mode commences.

“And who is this?” he asks with an unfriendly tone.

With an eye roll, I answer, “Lumberjack, this is Blake. Blake, this big oaf is Lumberjack.”

“Very funny, you little shit,” Dan spouts off at me.

“Nice to meet you, Sir,” Blake says with his hand stretched out to shake Dan’s.

Dan grabs his hand, which looks like he’s squeezing a little too hard, and says, “The name is Dan. And who are you to my Laken, boy?”

“I’m Laken’s date, sir,” he replies with a smile towards me.

Yeah, I shouldn’t have said that. I roll my eyes at him, to which Blake just smirks and winks.

“Date?” Dan asks with narrowed eyes.

“Okay! Well, now that introductions have been made I think we’re going to grab a booth since you seem to have a customer waiting on you,” I say while pointing to the counter. Thank you, customer!

“Hmm, well, okay, but we should have a chat soon, son. Make sure you’re treating my Laken right,” he says.

“If you mean respecting her and protecting her from that piece-of-shit dad she has then I would say I’m doing good so far,” he says with narrowed eyes right back at Dan.

“Hmm,” Dan says while stroking that full beard of his. Freaking lumberjack, I tell ya!

Dan winks at me and walks away to let us find a booth. As soon as I turn around and look over the diner my good mood plummets. Can I not get one good night away from the people that make my life a living hell?