PERCIE
The last time I saw a house like this was when I was with her. Just that memory alone felt like I'd been stabbed in my heart over and over again.
“Son, let me ask you one thing. Why did you risk yourself punching your boss when you saw him hitting his wife?”
My eyes narrowed at his intrusion.
“Is it a defense mechanism? Or because you didn’t like him abusing his wife in front of everyone?”
I opened the door and got out silently. He didn’t want to go there.
He leaned his arms against the roof of his car and said, “I don’t wanna know, son, but whatever it is, I know it’s hard for you, and it may take some time. But you will get there.
My nose flared in anger and in pain. I pressed my lips together to stop from blurting out something he wasn't ready to hear.
I just punched someone a few hours ago. I couldn’t punch him, and besides, he was a police officer. He had no bad intentions. All he was trying was to give some advice to someone who was a lost cause like me.
I squeezed my eyes shut and took a deep breath.
“Let’s get over this with so that I can go home.”
He smiled, and it irritated me. “Trying to get rid of me soon, Percival? Well, if you keep your knuckles in your pocket, you won’t see me sooner.”
I groaned and raked my fingers into my tousled brown hair. “You have no idea, officer. I don’t know why you are doing this? This isn’t a part of your job helping the offender by driving him home, feeding him dinner, and also not in a job description of a police officer to be a shrink.”
He patted my back. “Let’s get inside, Percie.”
I followed him into the house. He dropped the keys in a small bowl, then hang his coat on the rack. Then he led the way to their living room. There was a brown couch with a small glass coffee table and one snow globe on top.
“That’s my daughter’s. Her grandma gave that to her. Make yourself at home, Percie. I’ll be right back.”
I nodded.
How could this man read every thought I had? First, the strawberry air freshener. Now the snow globe. He was lucky he had a normal family, unlike mine, a very dysfunctional one. Since that accident, my family had never been like before, and it would never be back to normal.
Mom and Dad blamed me for that accident. They wished I died there. They even disowned me. I couldn’t blame them, though. I wished I did die that night because until now, I was constantly blaming myself too. I was more like a walking dead without emotions, no soul, and no heart. I died that night as well.
I heard footsteps and whispers coming from upstairs. Judging by those voices, that must be Keith and his wife. I rose from my seat and faced them as soon as they climbed downstairs. Keith was already in a white shirt and blue jeans while his wife was wearing a loose shirt and yoga pants.
“Percie, I’d like you to meet my wife, Lillian. Lillian, this is Percival.”
I shook the hand she offered and gave her a smile that I’d never done for months. “Nice to meet you, Lillian. Your husband here just brought an offender to your lovely home.”
She shook and squeezed my hand before releasing it. “Keith would never bring here an offender like you, Percival. He has a good judge of character. He may find you charming, and I can see you’re a handsome young man.”
My face heated. I looked down.
“Oh, honey, stop making him blush. Let’s prepare the dinner before Percie plans on running away.” He kissed her on her cheek.
“Have a seat, Percival. I’ll just set the table. I'm done cooking before you arrived.”
I smiled. “Thank you for having me, Lillian. It’s been a long time since I had dinner with a family.”
She gasped. Sadness crossed her beautiful face.
I regretted it right away. I wished I could just keep my mouth shut.
She walked right into me and hugged me, which caught me off guard. “Oh, sweet boy. You are welcome anytime you want. I’d love you to join us over dinner. I’ll let you meet my daughter, Haylie. She’ll be down in a minute.” She ran her hands on my arms.
I missed my mom doing like this to me. After the accident, she had changed. The sweet and thoughtful woman I knew for nineteen years has turned into a sour and cold-hearted mother.
I felt so ashamed of Keith and Lilian. They were good people.
“Thank you. I don’t think it’s a good idea coming over here just to eat your food.”
She laughed. Her rich voice echoed, warming my heart and crushing it at the same time. I missed hearing people laugh genuinely, not the ones with full of sarcasm like my mom.
“Oh, honey. All you have to do is knock. Anyway, I’ll go and set the table before you run away.”
Keith sat on the couch.
“I’ll help you set the table, Lillian.”
Keith chuckled behind my back. “Don’t you dare, Percie? Nobody touches her kitchen, utensils, and food until she's done serving. Even cleaning, me and Hailey had never bothered helping her.”
Lillian laughed again before she went to the kitchen.
“You have a beautiful family, Keith,” I compliment him heartily as I sat back on the couch.
He smiled brightly. “Thank you, Percie. My wife meant what she said. You can come over anytime or call me first as you like. Up to you. I’ll save my number on your phone later.”
“That’s too much already, Keith. Thank you, though.” I’d never interacted this long or sat with them in a home since last year if I wouldn’t count my grandparents. It felt a little awkward, but not with Keith. At least, not anymore.
Lillian called out from the kitchen.
“I’ll call Hailey to come down. Have a seat here, Percie. Don’t you mind if I call you Percie?” Lillian asked.
“I’m hungry. If I’ll tell you no, you might kick me out of the kitchen, or worse out of your lovely home.” I was surprised that I managed to crack a joke. It had been a long time since I was able to say something funny or sweet.
She pecked me on my cheek. “Have a seat, dear.”
I froze in my place. My eyes widened a little bit. No woman ever kissed me and treated me like her son since forever.
“Sit down here, Percie.” Keith motioned his hand at the empty chair on his left.
Her wife must be a good cook judging by what was on the table. A roasted chicken with rosemary and thyme. I could literally taste the spices in the air. Also, mashed potatoes, mixed vegetables, green salad, and dinner rolls bread.
A moment later, Lillian came back with their daughter this time.
As my gaze flew towards them, I gasped. My life suddenly froze as if everything surrounding me had turned to ice. In a split second, I felt like I’d been transported to a year back. It felt like a déjà vu.
This is impossible. In my breathless moment, my eyes widened. I could feel my jaw drop. My heart beat faster. I could even feel it against my ribcage.
I wanted to run away, but I also wanted to run into her and hug her at the same time.
How was this even possible? No way. I am Imagining this.
She stood around her height—five foot five inches. Her brown wavy hair ended just around her chest, just like her, but lighter. Her bushy eyebrows were furrowing, with her enormous brown eyes staring back at me. She also had high cheekbones, accentuated with her little nose, exactly the same as hers. She slightly parted full red lips.
“Percie, this is my daughter, Hailey. Honey, that's your Dad’s friend, Percie.” She was only wearing a dolphin printed shirt with matching a pajama bottom.
I blinked twice, or maybe more, and swallowed hard. I didn’t even realize I was holding my breath for too long until I was already catching it. I held my hands at the edge of the table to support myself from falling when I stood up. My legs wobbled, and I felt like an idiot when I noticed her walking towards her dad’s back and stopped in front of me.
She smiled shyly, showing her dimples. She was just as beautiful just like her. ”Hi, Percie. Nice to meet you.” Even her voice was almost the same as hers.
She offered her hand for a handshake. I looked down at it, thinking if I should shake it or not. But I didn’t want to be rude, or they would think that I was weird or germaphobic. My hands were still trembling with shock now that she was in my reach.
PERCIE Fifteenmonths ago… We were in an accident. My ears still tingled from the silence after the impact. I couldn’t move. Emma was pressed against me. “E-Em?”I coughed. My voice trembled. “Em?”My throat choked up. She didn’t respond. She didn’t move. I wanted to shake her badly, but I was so weak to do so. I smelled blood. It rolled down my temple to my face and neck. The smoke started to sting my nostrils. I started to hear noises from outside the car. The commotion escalated. The sirens of the ambulance resounded. Although my eyes were blurry, I whirled my gaze around and saw a bunch of heads surrounding us and the flashes of lights. I thought I was okay. I could still remember the paramedics who arrived and took me from the collision. Unfortunately, Emma wasn’t. I w
PERCIE It had been a week since I met Hailey. I was not supposed to think about her, but I couldn’t just stop, and it was starting to get annoying. It was maybe because they somehow looked alike. I started looking at myself in the mirror, counting our similarities. She didn’t talk much, as if socially withdrawn. She only said five words during the entire dinner then she excused herself. Keith mentioned that she would be starting her college at Hillston this semester. What a coincidence. My stupid inner-self somehow hoped for the possibility that we might bump with each other. As he promised, he took my number. Now, we were constantly exchanging texts. He even invited me for dinner again. I made an excuse that I couldn’t make it, which was the truth. I had to meet Grandpa every Saturday. But Keith didn’t buy my excuse. So I had to meet him again. Grandpa was relieved that I started talking to someo
PERCIEFifteen months ago…“I knew what you have, Emma. I knew about your condition. Why can’t you blame me? Yell at me or hate me? It makes me guiltier. Why do you have to be so cool about this?” I shook my head and stood up from her bed. I scratched my head out of frustration.“You sound okay with this. I hate seeing you like this. It’s killing me, Emma. Tell me why it’s so easy for you to accept all of these?” My voice rose a little.Her lips quivered. Jesus. Nothing in this world I did right. I settled beside her again as I dwelled my own agony.“I’m sorry, Em. I don’t know what to do. I don’t know how to put myself in this situation. I don’t even know what to do with myself without you. I don’t mean to yell at you. I’m just so frustrated and lost that I am so useless to you.” I kissed her forehead. ”Emma, I love you
PERCIE Fourteen months ago. My life was doomed the moment I walked out of the house where I grew up. I just lost everyone I loved. I lost my home, Emma, my family, friends, and even myself. I knew I was still alive because I could still feel the excruciating pain when I thought of them. My old life two months ago was near perfect, and everything went according to plan until that incident had drastically changed my life. I loathed myself. But I guessed I deserved to feel every agonizing pain I felt right now. When I arrived at my grandparent's house, they were already waiting for me. I could see the pain in their eyes. I cried until I gave up, but the pain was still there. It was even worse. I couldn’t eat. The food was upsetting my stomach. I couldn’t sleep. The nightmare was constantly visiting me the moment I closed my eyes. I kept myself awake, listening to o
PERCIE I called Grandpa that night after coming home from dinner at Ward’s house. “Are you sure it’s a good idea to live with a young woman on the same roof? I’m not worried about you, but about that girl. She’s a cop’s daughter, Percival.” He sighed from the other line. “And what is the problem there? She won’t stay here long once she finds a roommate.” “And if she won’t? You’re a young man, Percival. How about the temptations? When was the last time you get laid? Or jerked off yourself?” My face heated with embarrassment. Why grandpa had to remind me of my boring sex life?Jeez. “Jesus, Grandpa. Can we not talk about my sex life, please?” I rolled my eyes. This is not the topic I wanted to talk about with him, but he had a point. “Up to you, Percival, but if it helps you improve your social skills, then go ahead. Just treat her right, and behave, okay?”
PERCIE Fourteen months ago… “Oh, boy. Did you just apologize? I can’t believe you can still remember words. I thought your brain is drained, too.” Grandma snorted while raising her brow. “Stop making him feel guilty, Grace. Look at him. He doesn’t have any more left in him other than his skin and bones. Why won’t you try to cheer him up by telling him about his new apartment.” “Wait, what?” I asked quickly. I felt something new inside me. Excitement? Hope? “You found an apartment for me?” Grandma hit Grandpa’s arm playfully. “You, old mutt. Can’t keep your mouth shut for a while, can you? Now, where is the moment of surprise there?” Grandpa laughed. “Surprise my butt. He got one surprised already. I think that’s good enough for him to get outside his hell hole.” After the longest three weeks, I found myself smiling. “Thanks to both of you.” Grandma waved her hand. “Don’t thank us yet. You’ll pay
PERCIE Thirteen months ago… I left that day from rehab, defeated, but it wouldn’t stop me from seeing her again. I wanted to prove that it was a stupid mistake. And I had no plan on doing it again. Despite my defeat, I still had one reason to move forward. My grandparents brought me to my new apartment. I didn’t even know that Grandpa was busy furnishing while I was busy trying to kill myself. The fully furnished two-bedroom apartment met my taste. The black leather couches in the small living room with 46” flat tv screen mounted on the wall, a 60” framed art poster of my favorite football team, taken during their championship game. A small kitchen with stainless steel appliances and what caught my attention was the latest coffeemaker. Then the coal-colored cupboards, countertops, and kitchen island. My dark blue-colored bedroom had queen size bed, two nightstands, and a closet of the same color. There wa
PERCIE I groaned when my alarm went off. I got up from bed lazily, rubbed my eyes, and walked outside my room. I led my way to the kitchen, halted when someone yelped. My sleepiness was gone in an instant. I curse under my breath. Hailey’s wide eyes met mine. Her lips slightly parted. It slipped off my mind that I wasn’t alone anymore. We both stared at each other for a few seconds. I blinked twice. Shit! I just remembered that I was only wearing boxers, and she didn’t have to know when a guy just got up from bed, someone, or rather something, woke up as well. ”Sorry.” I ran back to my room. I looked down at my half-naked body. Fuck. I grabbed a shirt and sweatpants and put them on quickly. I walked into my bathroom, washed my face, brushed my teeth, and rinsed my face again. I sniffed my underarm. Why am I doing these?Did I just ask myself in the