Val - Lying In Wait

I've been preserved in amber, I am one with the sheets, I am zen.

Back at the plush bed, I sink even further into comfort, soft sweet smelling fabric pushing against my cheek. My limbs are pliant, every muscle in my face relaxed, each breath in and out is evenly spaced. Relaxed back into the same fucking position I collapsed in last night.

This guy is a FUCKING IDIOT.

Does he really think I am his actual pet and not a woman planning violent, glorious murder.

He really thinks I'm that easy. He actually left me alone.

Which tells me Caelum is either the most arrogant bastard alive… or he's testing me. Either way, I don't have time to waste.

Behind the closed lids of my "peacefully sleeping" face, I've already replayed every step of our walk a dozen times. The breakfast room, the turn in the hall, the path he took through the gardens, the way the light bent before he pulled whatever magic trick it was when he pretended to tear open the world.

Every. Possible. Escape.

My muscles scream as I finally shift, there wasn't a single toe wiggle all night. I committed to the fucking role, method actress levels of stillness, just so he'd think I'd gone under like a tranquilized puppy, all soft and tamed. Every muscle has been killing me all morning, I've been tensing and untensing each one in order just to work out the knots that formed over those painful hours when he watched me 'sleep'.

Now I stretch slowly, roll my neck until it cracks, and let the smile slide off my face.

The rage simmers up hot behind my ribs, licking at my spine.

He really thought he could bring me here. Drug my food so this part of his grounds looked all fancy, parade me past some magic looking meadow, sit me down to a breakfast that absolutely tasted like it had something slipped in it, smile at me like a fucking Bond villain, and I'd what, melt? Moan? Spread my legs and thank him for the fairy-tale?

And then, and this is the part that's got my blood boiling, he stood there like some midnight prince in his perfect coat and had the audacity to look me in the eye and say:

"I'm death."

Bitch, what?!

No. Nope. We're done here. Whatever fantasy he thinks I'm about to play into, I'm not the heroine. I'm the blade, the bomb under the floorboards, the disaster he invited in and thought he could house train.

He's going to regret letting me catch my breath.

Because I'm not fucking staying.

The door clicks open with a whisper, barely more than a breath, and I peek through like a guilty teenager sneaking out for a smoke.

Left. Empty.

Right...

Fuck me sideways.

There's a goddamn man-mountain standing there.

A towering form leant casually against the wall, a bouncer on break, arms crossed over a chest carved out of regret and gym rage. I have to force the laugh back down to my boots, because Caelum has got this guy cosplaying Hellboy to try and scare me from leaving. He's even got thick black horns curling out of his head and glossy wings folded tight against his back.

Oh. Okay. We're doing this now.

Our eyes meet and he grins, all teeth and malevolent cheer.

"Well hello, sunshine," he rumbles, voice so deep it shakes the hallway. "Where we off to in such a hurry?"

I blink, and then, because my brain has decided it doesn't want to process this particular brand of surreal horror just yet, I blurt,

"Are those flame contacts?"

He arches one perfect brow, but doesn't respond.

No, nope, absolutely not. I cannot believe he hired someone to dress up as a demon in a Halloween store clearance bin to stand here and catch me in the act? Are we doing theatrical intimidation now? Is this a skit?

"Who the fuck are you?" I snap before I can stop myself.

His grin stretches wider.

"Well there she is," he drawls, delighted. "Yeah, there's nothing wrong with you at all."

Shit. Shit. SHIT. I was supposed to be soft. Polite. Obedient and docile and weirdly into garden tours. Not snarling at the first mythical linebacker I see.

I take a step back. He takes one forward.

I take another. His hands come up, palms out.

"Easy, sunshine. No one's gonna bite you." Then, with a wicked flick of his eyes toward my mouth, he adds, "Unless you ask real nice."

I fake gag on air. Fake obviously because behind their weird costume, this guy is sex on legs.

"What the fuck is happening," I hiss, more to myself than anyone.

As he gets level with me, and I think he's going to stop and shove me back into the room, he actually keeps going, just steps past me. Brushing close enough that I catch a whiff of ozone and metal.

His wing twitches, adjusting as he moves, an animatronic? Really, wow he's gone all out.

But why isn't he stopping me?

Over his shoulder, he calls,

"You've got a five-minute head start, sunshine. Better make it count."

My jaw drops.

"Why?"

He looks over his shoulder so I can see his profile and winks.

"Because this is gonna be hilarious."

Then he disappears around the corner, laughing.