“He’ll probably ask me how long it took you to get inside my pants.” I sighed. “Then he’ll go all jealous and proceed to pin me up against a wall somewhere and kiss the shit out of me.”“You don’t sound so averse to the wall-pinning.”“Mmph,” I grunted as he pulled into my drive and I stared at the front door. “Know what I hate? I hate that we still feel the same as we did when I left Santa Monica. That fucking nothing has changed. I wish he could hate me without loving me at the same time, because then maybe I wouldn’t love him as much back.”“Still happy?” Bray turned in his seat and raised his eyebrows at me.I backhand slapped his chest. “I was. Once. Now all that gives me even a modicum of happiness is Milka. I love her, so much, Bray, but I wish I didn’t love her daddy. I wish with everything I have that I didn’t want him the way I do.”“You need to go to bed, Chloe,” he cut in.“Why? I’m only saying my thoughts out loud.”“I know. But I’m not the person you should be saying the
It was dumb as fuck in the first place. I knew Chloe and Bray didn’t have anything going on. Hell, he’s told me more than once that he only sees her as his sister. I couldn’t imagine her feeling anything for him, either.Shit, if she really feels for me like she says, then she can’t feel anything for anyone else.Truth is, I couldn’t believe her when she said she loved me. If she left once, she can leave again. If she can lie to me once, she can lie again. There was the bottom line—I loved her but I didn’t trust her. I didn’t trust her not to run and take Milka with her.I didn’t trust her to not take everything from me again. Because she was my everything. She was every beat of my heart and every breath I took. Maybe we’d never have lasted forever, but we were in the moment, and that was what mattered.Now we were stuck in a fucked-up limbo.We wanted each other, and we loved each other, but neither of us wanted to. That wasn’t the basis for any kind of relationship, not even friends
Going downstairs, I got Milka out of her high chair and brought her into the front room with me. She jumped off the sofa almost immediately and toddled over to her toy box. I let her go and turned on the TV.It was right there:IS THE LEAD SINGER OF DIRTY J. A DADDY?Yes. Yes, he fucking is, and it’s none of your damn business, you nosy bitch.Somehow I didn’t think Mark would be impressed if I sent that in to their “What Do You Think?” email address. The screen flicked to their reporter, and the backdrop was my house. I turned the volume up to listen.“ . . . since his coming out yesterday to carry some groceries in, there have been no sightings of Conor or, indeed, any of Dirty J.”Carrying groceries in was making news now? Don’t they have anything better to be doing?“And what’s the general consensus outside the house this morning, Hanna? Is there any truth to the reports?”“Unfortunately we don’t know. Dirty J’s representatives aren’t returning calls or emails, so one would assume
“I handled it just fine until I ended up playing personal assistant to three-quarters of Dirty J.” She frowned. “Is it like that everywhere you go? The girls all the time?”“You got caught up in that? Shit. They get . . . excited.”“Yeah, no kidding. Do girls often hand Aiden their underwear with their number scrawled inside?”My lips tugged up into a huge grin. “More often than you’d think.”“Classy.” She rolled her eyes. “Got any of your own?”“None that didn’t find their way into either the trash or my brothers’ pockets before I got back to my room.”I never took numbers. I never wanted numbers. Not theirs.“Really? I don’t believe that.”I shrugged. “You don’t have to, princess.”“Good thing, too,” she murmured, sipping her coffee. “Anyway. I shouldn’t have said what I did last night. It was out of order, so was pretending to go on a date with Bray. I’m sorry.”“I’d be apologizing for the shorts, personally.” My minds flashed back to that morning.And my eyes dropped to her hips,
The bitch wished.Conor continued staring at me, his eyes not flicking away for even a millisecond. “What did she tell you?”“Nothing that would bother me.”“Liar.”“Says who?”“Says your bright red cheeks. You always were a shit liar.”I snapped my eyes to him and grabbed my milk shake from the end of the table. “She tried to make me believe you two were . . . intimate . . . after I left.”Conor laughed, choking on his soda, and thumped his chest. “She told you what?”“Don’t make me say it again.” I screwed my face up and swirled my straw around my glass.“I wouldn’t fuck Tina with a ten-foot pole. No, ignore that. I wouldn’t touch her with a fifty-foot one, let alone fuck her with it.”“I don’t care.” I sipped slowly.“You should get your cheeks looked at. It can’t be good for them to be that red all the time.”“Screw you.”“You wish.”“You’re such a child.”“You bring it out in me. What can I say? I can’t help it.”“This is ridiculous. Did you really bring me to lunch so we could b
“Won’t your baby’s mom care?”“In,” he ordered me, shoving the car door open.I didn’t need telling twice. I threw myself into the car and he slammed the door. He ran around the front, shoving a photographer out of the way, and got in the driver side. He reved the engine in seconds, but it didn’t drown out their shouted questions.He pulled away from the diner. “We’ll have to go to my house. Your car will have to stay there. I’ll get you a rental.”“No point,” I muttered, sliding down in my seat. “They’ll probably know my name, address, and fucking bra size by morning.”He didn’t respond because he knew it was the truth. They’ll run the pictures and try to get as much information about the blonde girl with the scandal-surrounded singer. That was all that would matter to them.Who am I? And am I his baby’s mom?I brought my legs up and sunk my fingers into my hair, dropping my forehead to my knees. I knew this was a bad idea. I fucking told him so, and he didn’t listen to me.Every per
No matter how angry I was at her for saying she wished she’d never come back, she didn’t deserve what I said.Because she was justified. She was only trying to protect Milka. She was doing what came naturally to her. What should come naturally to me.Only I didn’t protect her. I did the exact opposite. I threatened her.“Fuck!”I rested my forearms against the nearest tree and leaned in. I stared at the ground and knocked the bark repeatedly with the end of my fists. My eyes burnt with guilty tears. For both Chloe and Milka.Neither of them deserved this. Not for a single fuckin’ second.“Well, you were on fire there.” Jane’s voice traveled across the yard.“If you’re out here to give me a piece of your mind, don’t bother. I already got it in my own head.”“Nah, she already gave you what you deserve, you jerk.”“Gee, thanks for the support.” I pushed off the tree and headed back into the house. “I don’t need you to remind me I fucked up. My daughter being here without her mother will
“You were out there, calmin’ yourself down. I had no intention of interrupting you,” Mom interrupted with a stern look. “You sure as hell need it after yesterday.”I ignored the annoyance that showed in her voice and walked past her into the house. “What time is she picking Milka up?”“In an hour,” Mom replied. “Leah texted me.”“Okay.” I kissed Milka’s head and placed some toast in the toaster. “She okay?”“Leah? She’s fine.”“You know I mean Chloe.”“How do you define ‘fine’?” she asked with an eyebrow raise. “Would you say you’re fine right now?”I’d take that as a no.My toast popped, and I spreaded peanut butter across each slice. I bit into it, the crunch satisfying, and leaned against the counter. The silence was tense and awkward.Until Aiden came in the front door looking like he slept outside all night.“Aiden!” Mom snapped. “Where have you been?”“Lay off it, Mom.” He went straight upstairs. Hopefully to shower.Titus snorted, walking into the kitchen. “Hey, bro, at least t