CHAPTER 8: MORE THAN A MISTAKE.

Isabella’s Pov.

Shots of pleasure filled me in waves as Killian pounded me. I tossed my head back, grabbed Killian hard, my nails digging into his skin. 

His lips were on mine again as he slid in and out of my core. He mumbled something I didn’t hear. 

“Good girl,” he kept muttering as I instinctively lifted my legs to give him more room. He was different. He was no longer the possessive and cold two-faced Killian…he was…different.

His forehead occasionally rests against mine when he sucks in breaths. He kissed my lips gently, then my face, down to the nape of my neck.

I closed my eyes and allowed myself to forget any complications between us. Unlike the first time we were together, I had been heartbroken and vulnerable. This time however, I wanted this.

“Killian…” I moaned softly.

“Hmm?”

“Look at me.” He slowed down, lifted his head and looked directly into my eyes. “Are you going to regret this tomorrow?”

“No.” His answer came sharply.

“You said that last time.”

His expression changed. He understood exactly what I was referring to. I had mentioned it over and over again, almost every time we met.. 

“I know what I said.”

“You called me a mistake.”

He was still inside me but didn’t move an inch. “I was wrong, Isabella.”

“And what makes this different?”

He didn’t immediately answer. He brushed his thumb gently against my cheek. “Because you were never a mistake, Belle. Not then. Not now. Never.”

Everything in me wanted to believe him. His words meant more to me than I could ever admit. I kissed him gently. But the question I had been avoiding was still sitting in my chest. 

He hissed and continued thrusting in and out of me. He lifted my right leg and dyckef me hard. I swallowed my questions once more, replaced by a surging urge for release.

But I didn’t go for it. I was troubled. Jace has rejected me…If we have to keep this up—

I grabbed his arm and forced him to a halt. “What happens after tonight?”

“What do you mean?”

“Us.”

He paused.

“What are we going to be after this?”

The sudden silence felt louder than the music outside. The car was dimly lit by passing headlights on the road. 

I studied his face. “We are doing this for the second time, Killian. I don’t want to wake up tomorrow and hear you call me a mistake, a baby, or unripe.”

His breath was still uneven, but his expression had changed. 

My fear was getting the best of me. 

“Isabella…”

“No. Please, just answer me.” I tried to sound firm but my voice betrayed me. “Are we together? Are you interested in me? Or am I just someone you can’t keep your hands off?”

 He looked away, ran his hand through his hair and pulled out. He came out soft, like a squish.

He pulled his pants on and sat back. I adjusted but still waited for him to say something. 

“I want you, Isabella.”

“That’s not what I asked.” There is a thick line between being wanted and being loved. I need to know where I stood. Or I already knew, just wanted to hear it from him. My heart was beating fast. 

“I know.”

“Then answer me.”

“It’s complicated.”

I scoffed and gave a bitter laugh. “Why is it always complicated with you?”

“Because Daniels is my best friend.”

“And I’m his sister. I know,” I countered. He’s said it so many times, it’s music to my ears.

“You don’t understand what would happen if he found out.” Killian adjusted. 

“Then let him find out.”

“It’s not that simple.”

“Your father?”

He looked at me then. “Is this about him too?” I added. 

He didn’t deny it.

“So your father doesn’t want you near me, but our best friend doesn’t want you near me, and you can’t decide whether I’m worth the trouble.”

“That’s not what I said.” His voice was thick and metallic. I began to shift uncomfortably.

“I don’t need you to promise me forever.”

“Isabella—”

“Why can’t you just say we’re together? Am I really not worth anything, a sex toy you wish to keep in the dark?” A hot tear fell down my cheek. “Just like Jace.”

“Isabella, I’m not—”

I slapped his hand away. That was my last straw. I was already begging, begging to be wanted or loved. I began adjusting my clothes.

“What are you doing?”

“We are done talking,” I replied.

“Isabella—”

“You were a one-night stand. People do it all the time!” I yelled. My hands were shaking. I struggled to get her myself. I didn’t try to rub the tears off. Killian began to explain himself but none of his words mattered anymore. I gave him enough chance to talk. 

I opened the door and dashed out like I had been kidnapped before. My wolf felt bad but I didn’t care.

The night air hit my skin. I was still trying to compose myself when I heard Killian calling behind me.

“Isabella, get back in the car.”

“No.”

“You’re not walking away like this.”

“Watch me.”

“Can you just listen to me?”

“I’ve listened to you enough.”

He caught up with me. “I never said I didn’t want you.”

I stopped walking. “You don’t have to say it. You make it very clear.”

“I told you that you are but a mistake.”

“Then stop treating me like one!”

“Do you know what I thought when you kissed me tonight? I thought maybe you regretted what happened that morning. I thought maybe you wanted me too.”

“I do want you.”

“But not enough to stand by me.”

He had no immediate answer.

“I won’t be another secret, Killian. I won’t be someone you touch when nobody is watching and pretend not to know when they are.”

I turned away. 

Killian called after me, “Isabella!”

I didn’t stop..

I wiped my tears before anyone noticed back in the house. I didn’t want to return to the party, but I needed to find Betty.

“Where is Killian?” Betty appeared, worried. 

“I don’t want to talk about him, can we go?”

“Did he do something?”

“Please Betty, I just want to leave.”

Betty took my hand. “Okay, let’s go.”

As we walked out, I noticed Killian by his car, watching me. Betty saw him too but decided not to say anything. 

Just before we left, my wolf did something unexpected.