His Darkest Obsession (Haunted Kings #1)

“Paula is your ex?!” I screech like a banshee. 

Kenneth, my boyfriend, who’s just returned from the bathroom, stares at me like he’s just seen a ghost. 

And apparently that ghost must have gotten his tongue too because all the words he’s trying to string together come out sounding like he’s just got a stroke. “Jo…I, uh—It’s…not—“

My chest feels heavy, like an elephant has just sat on it. All that keeps running through my mind is You’re such a fool, Joanna! You’ve been fooled twice! Twice! 

Kenneth glances warily at the phone in my hand. It’s his phone. The one I’d just gone through while he was in the bathroom. 

I hate the way my hands are shaking as I keep scrolling through the texts he’d exchanged with his “best friend” just minutes ago. The weight on my chest becomes heavier with each line: 

Kenneth: you know i’ve always wanted it to be you, right? she’s lying here in my arms and all i can think about why we ever broke up. you were it for me. 

Paula❤️: LOL, Ken. Don’t bring this up again. You and I, we’ve had our chance. 

Kenneth: yeah, but you broke up with me because your parents didn’t like me. i never wanted to break up.

Paula❤️: Ken, seriously. Drop it. And don’t pin it all on me. You’re the one who couldn’t wait. 

Kenneth: are you being fr rn? I’ve always asked you if were cool with me asking out other girls and you’ve always said yes.

Paula❤️: Newsflash: not every yes is a yes. God, you can be so dumb sometimes. 

Paula ❤️: How could I ever be cool with you being with anyone else? 

Paula❤️: I’ve always nursed the idea that you and I will eventually end up together, and this will all be stuff we can laugh about when we’re old and married.

Kenneth: yeah, me too. but…we just have to get your parents to approve of me first….

Paula❤️: Yeah. And until then, I’ll stay and watch in the sidelines while these girls come and go. 

Kenneth: you don’t have to be in the sidelines tho…👀

Paula❤️: LOL, tease. 

I stare back up at him. “Kenneth, Paula is your ex? All this time, you’ve been best friends with your ex, and you made me accept her?”  I ask. This time, tears cloud my vision. 

Kenneth runs a hand through his dark messy hair as he watches me with an expression of pure guilt. “Jo, I…”

It’s all too much for me. Even though I’m practically holding the evidence in my hands, a stupid part of me was hoping he’d deny it. 

God, I’ve been such a fool. 

The tears stream down my face now as I remember every source of insecurity I’d experienced in the last year. Silently comparing myself with my boyfriend’s best friend. Silently wondering why I was never enough for him. How he always chose to confide in her before me. Forcing a smile at their private jokes. Bending my back to accommodate her presence in moments that were supposed to be private for Ken and I. Whatever I did, it always seemed like I could never meet up to Paula’s place in Ken’s life. 

And God, I tried. I really tried to be the understanding girlfriend. I tried not to feel jealous whenever I dropped by Ken’s place and met them cuddling or being cozy. I tried to accept Paula as a part of Ken’s life—we even exchanged skin care routines for fucksakes. 

And the craziest part was how they never hid how close they were. So, although my instincts always picked that something was off, the fact that it was happening right in front of my eyes removed the danger from the threat. 

When Ken and I started dating early the previous year, I found his friendship with Paula cute. I would even tease him about Paula having a secret crush on him, and he would mumble that he could never see her that way because she was “like a little sister” to him. 

I even felt sorry for her at some point because it was quite obvious that she had a thing for Ken, and I talked to Ken about setting boundaries so she wouldn’t be too hurt. He insisted that he couldn’t do that because he was the only friend Paula had, and it would hurt her. 

The first major fight Ken and I had in our relationship was on my birthday last June. And it was about Paula. 

Ken had planned a surprise for Paula on her birthday in May, and he’d filled me in on it. Cakes, chocolates, flowers, books, the works. He’d had them delivered to her dorm, and I’d been the one to film her surprise reaction with my phone. I’d thought it was sweet because they were best friends. 

Imagine my hurt a month later, on my own birthday,  when Ken had “forgotten” that it was my special day. Birthdays are a big deal for me, so I’d spent the entire day with a gaping hole in my chest, forcing myself to smile at the wishes and calls I got from friends and family—all because my boyfriend hadn’t even so much as dropped a happy birthday text. Yet he’d planned a whole surprise for his best friend. 

I didn’t speak to him for weeks. He begged and even tried reaching me through my roommate Ria. Paula had reached out too, pleading on his behalf for forgiveness. And like a fool, I’d given in. But, that was when my insecurities began. I started comparing everything and anything he did for and with me to whatever he did for Paula. 

“And you gaslit me into thinking I was overreacting whenever I brought her up,” I say, my voice breaking.

Kenneth actually flinches as if hearing the words out loud hurts. “Jo—”

“No! Shut the fuck up!” I snap.

The sound echoes through the apartment. For once, he shuts up. He doesn’t have an explanation ready. For once, he doesn’t tell me I’m being insecure. Or jealous. Or dramatic. Because what exactly is he supposed to say now? That I imagined these messages? That I somehow misunderstood a year of emotional cheating spelled out in black and white?

My hands shake so violently that I drop his phone. It clatters to the floor and I hear a crack, but I don’t give a fuck. 

“You told me she was like a sister to you.”

Kenneth closes his eyes.

I laugh. It’s an ugly sound. “God, that’s actually hilarious. Color me the picture of every stupid movie cliche. The idiot boyfriend and his clingy female best friend.”

“Joanna, please listen to me.”

“Why?” I ask. “You’ve never listened to me.”

Tears blur my vision again. “You heard me every time I said your relationship with Paula made me uncomfortable. You heard me every time I asked for boundaries. You heard me when I cried after my birthday. But you never listened.”

I point at the phone. “And all along, this was what was happening behind my back?”

“It wasn’t like that,” he mumbles like an idiot. 

I stare at him. “Not like what?” I cross my arms. “Tell me, Kenneth, what part wasn’t like that?”

He opens his mouth. Closes it. Opens it again. A human fish. “I never cheated on you,” he says finally. 

The words hit me so hard I almost laugh. Because they’re pathetic. “That’s your defense?”

His shoulders slump. “I loved you.”

Loved. Past tense. The realization slices straight through me.

Not love. Loved.

I watch his face carefully. Everything clicks. Every late-night phone call. Every canceled date. Every time he seemed distracted when he was with me. Every time he defended Paula before he defended me.

I wasn’t competing with some hypothetical girl. I wasn’t insecure. I wasn’t crazy. I was in a relationship with a man whose heart belonged to someone else. 

you know i’ve always wanted it to be you, right?

A sob escapes me. I know that those messages will haunt me for months to come. 

Kenneth takes a step forward. I immediately take one back.

His face crumples. “Jo.”

“Don’t. Stay the fuck away from me.” 

I need to get out of here. I rush to the closet and grab the overnight bag I’d packed to spend the weekend with him. God, we’d literally just had sex like an hour ago, and all the while he’d been thinking about another woman. I feel nauseous. Used. Stupid. Small. 

I’m even in my bra and panties, for fucksakes. 

“Jo, I never wanted to hurt you.”

“Well congratu-fucking-lations,” I snarl through the tears as I frantically put on my clothes. 

Outside, a car horn blares somewhere in the distance. Life goes on. People keep moving. Meanwhile my entire relationship is collapsing in front of me. I zip my bag closed and grab my phone from the nightstand. 

Kenneth watches me, his hands dangling uselessly at his sides. For his sake, I really hope he doesn’t try coming close to me again because I will roundhouse-kick his stupid face if he does. 

God, I hate him. I hate Paula. I hate myself for ignoring my instincts and being comfortable as second choice. 

At the door, I pause and turn back to him. I need to know something. Call it closure, call it a hunt for pain. “Did you ever love me?”

Kenneth freezes.

And that—

That is my answer.

The hesitation.

The fact that he has to think about it.

My heart breaks all over again. “Oh my God.”

“Jo—”

I walk out and slam the door, my bleeding heart trailing behind me as I go.