Imaginations

Iris pov

I didn't know what I was thinking when I interlocked my lips with his own. All I knew was that it felt so right that every other thought was shot out of my mind like a speeding bullet and my only focus was on his plump juicy lips wrapping around my own.

Since I had never been with a man before, the closest I ever came to kissing was when my lips would press against a pillow imagining what it would be like to actually kiss.

And now it had now been strapped into the wangon of reality and it was far more amazing than I could have ever imagined.

But then it was all interrupted when suddenly there is a hard knock on the door that sent both of us jumping away from each other I thought that I was going to fall off the bed and suddenly I felt his wrist and my hand holding me back but this time I wasn't landing on his chest again and I ached to feel the warmth that was there.

Even if he didn't bring me back to his chest I noticed that you didn't stick his hand over him as he conversed with a person that had been knocking on the door as if life itself depended on Arthur responding to his call.

"What is it?" I was surprised at how annoying he sounded. Was he also getting into the kiss as well? I didn't really feel him applying much pressure but at the same time you could have easily pulled me away but he didn't. Was that enough for me to think that he liked it too? I wonder.

 they seem to be a couple more exchanging confuses between him and the person that was pounding on the door and it was finally concluded with him yelling that he will be coming over that he needed to wrap up something quickly, after saying this you change my position and I was now resting against the pillow.

"You…"

he was no longer holding me but from the way she spoke alone I was able to tell that he was breathing very heavily in front of me how is he going to react to the kiss now?

"We will discuss your father later until then don't make any trouble for me…"

My mouth fell wide enough for two flies to hover in and out with ease, was he really going to pretend as if we had not just shared a passionate kiss with each other?

"O-okay.. is that all?" was my first kiss and I was hoping for more reaction after a long awkward silence. I heard him stumbling over to the door and then he seemed to sigh tiredly.

"Is there anything else?"

 I was trying to hide the shock that was probably written all over my face right now was there really nothing that he could say to me right now? At least if you hated it I wanted to hear how much I just gave this man my first kiss and with as much passion as any woman could call into her first kiss and he was pushing it off as if it had not even happened at all.

  So I decided to gather as much of my pride as I could and then I wrapped my hands around my chest and told him that there was nothing left he reminded me not to cause trouble for you one last time he was out of the room when I could no longer here is footsteps I looked around for the pillow and burying my face inside.

 Was the kiss so bad that he didn't even want to talk about it at all?

He was not the only one that could act nonchalant I could also copy him too and pretend as if it meant nothing to me, after all I didn’t know my fate here.

  Tears were beginning to sting my eyes and I quickly brushed them off with the back of my hand, I told myself that I was not going to think about it after all I really had a trauma that I was supposed to overcome if I wanted to see again and I didn't want to add anymore to my own plate.

 Now this was what I told myself but when it was finally time for me to eat later on, I found that I had completely lost my appetite and I was just poking at the food with my cutlery even though everything smells so appetizing I couldn't bring myself to take a single bite.

And I didn't feel any better knowing that he was eating on the same table with me completely undisturbed by what happened, times like this my blindness felt so frustrating at least if I could see how his face had been when I had kissed him I would have just a little bit idea about how he was feeling but I had nothing to work on other than his words and his actions and none of them were telling me anything.

"Do you actually plan to eat your food or are you going to poke at it all day long?"

 His cold voice came over to me and then I apologized and began to force feed myself.

 "... You are going to make me lose my appetite if you keep eating like that,"

As soon as you said that I dropped my fork out of frustration, what exactly was I supposed to do that would be satisfying enough for him?

 "Sir ..I don't mean to be rude but what do you really want when I'm eating you say I'm making you lose your appetite and when I'm not you asked if I'm going to waste food…what should I be doing then?"

  There was a grunt from him before he responded to this question.

"Is it too much to ask for you to eat like a normal person?"

"It is," I said without even thinking and there was a thick silence between us for a while.

 Then all of a sudden I heard him sighing heavily.

"...if only I knew you were going to be this much work on the day we met then I would have just…"

He suddenly stopped and then I found myself getting up to my feet facing the direction of his voice and planting my hands on my hips, the anger that I was feeling that was running through my veins as swiftly as my blood was eradicating most of my fear that I had for him at the moment.

 "... Why did you stop? Just go ahead and say it!"

I was yelling before I even realised it.

"It's fine go ahead and say it you wish you have left me for dead don't worry even my own father wanted me dead…while he ran away with his precious wife and children…"

 I couldn't believe that I was recounting this incident to him twice in one day, but the words were rolling out of my mouth before I could even control them and pull them back in.

"... I don't know why you are interested in my father but he wouldn't care if I was dead in a ditch somewhere…that is the truth whether you choose to believe me or not…"

  This time I didn't burst into tears and I was just fuming, I heard the scratching of a chair which informed me that Arthur was probably getting up just then I could feel all of the courage that had built up because of my anger beginning to spill away.

  "...I wasn't going to say that I wanted you dead," he said, though he sounded confused as he was speaking.

"You don't understand how long I've been trying to look for your father how desperately…"

"But why?" I found myself asking wondering why on earth will he be so fixated in finding my father. There was a silence that was meant for my question that made me wonder if he had just walk away quietly after I asked him.

  But as his deep voice penetrated mine he again . I was relieved to know that he had not abandoned me to be standing awkwardly by the dining table and actually answered my question.

"You can't be able to understand it…"

he insisted and then I stepped closer to him finding a little bit of my courage that was left telling him that he should have least give me a chance to decide about whether or not I could understand it now we were close enough that I could smell the cologne on his skin mixing up with his own intoxicating natural scent and it was honestly making my head spin a little but I tried to remain focused on the conversation at hand.

   "Look he…" for a brief second it seemed like he was going to respond, as if I had managed to break a barrier with him, a wall  that had been standing in between the two of us.

"It doesn't matter,"

No, it was just my imagination.