Chapter 3: Brother and Little Sissy

ASHANNAH’S POV

Pagkatapos kong kumain ay umakyat na ako at pumasok sa silid ko. Kinuha ko ang laptop at binuksan ang social media account ko. I opened my F******k account first, then clicked the messages.

I saw Fayrea’s message asking if I’m okay, so I replied “yes.” Then I saw Avia’s message, asking who I am with in the house. I replied, “my brother.” Since Fayrea was already offline, Avia was the one who replied.

Avia: So your dear brother cut his class to babysit you while you’re on your period?

I rolled my eyes after reading Avia’s reply.

“What’s new? He’s always like that ever since. So what’s the matter?” I replied.

She answered, “Okay. If that’s so, then I’ll leave this soc-med. Bye-bye, my dear! Enjoy your time with your so-called brother.” Then she added a sarcastic emoji. Inis akong nag-log out at tumihaya sa kama.

Bakit ba binibigyan nila ng malisya ang lahat ng nasa pagitan namin ni Ythaniel? Kahit ‘yung mga katulong dito sa bahay, sinasabing bagay kaming dalawa, bilang babae’t lalaki, at hindi bilang magkapatid. Sa mga estudyante naman sa school, sinasabihan akong baka boyfriend ko raw si Ythaniel dahil napaka sweet daw namin palagi. What’s wrong with these people?

Tumayo ako nang may kumatok sa pintuan. Nakasimangot kong binuksan ito.

“What’s with that face?” Kunot noong tanong ni Ythaniel sa akin, kaya mas lalo pa akong sumimangot.

“Someone’s bullying you again on social media?” he asked. Alam kasi niyang maraming umaaway sa akin sa social media dahil sa kanya. Paanong ‘di ako aawayin eh kasama ko palagi yung ultimate crush nila, the campus heartthrob, Ythaniel Delos Reyes! Tsk.

“No. It’s not someone. It’s Avia,” I said while pouting.

“Oh? What did she say this time?” he asked again. Alam niyang tinutukso ako ni Avia at Fayrea sa kanya.

“That I should enjoy my time with you,” I honestly said. I couldn’t see his face because I was looking at the floor.

“Hmm? Is that so? Can I come in?” he asked. I nodded my head. Wala namang malisya sa akin ‘yun kasi palagi naman kaming magkasama sa isang kwarto, except when we are sleeping. That’s not appropriate.

Tumabi ako at niluwagan ang pagkakabukas ng pinto ng silid ko para makapasok siya.

“Come here and drink your milk.” Lumapit naman ako sa kanya at kinuha ang tinimplang gatas sa kamay niya bago umupo sa sofa bed malapit sa kama ko.

“Hindi na ba sumasakit ang puson mo?” he asked again.

“Hindi na. Ayos na ang pakiramdam ko. Salamat sa gatas,” ngumiti ako sa kanya. Tiningnan niya ako ng maigi kaya tiningnan ko rin siya.

“Anong problema mo, brother?” I asked him.

“Nothing.” Maikling sagot niya at iniling ang ulo saka tumayo mula sa pagkakaupo sa sofa.

“Matulog ka na. May klase pa bukas. Uuwi daw sina Mom at Dad bukas,” sabi niya habang binubuksan ang pinto.

“Good night, Brother,” saad ko. Lumingon siya sa akin at ngumiti.

“Good night, Little Sissy,” sagot niya at tuluyan nang lumabas ng silid ko.

Ininom ko ang gatas ko at tumihaya sa kama pagkatapos.

Paano nga ba naging magkapatid ang isang Ashannah Zacharias at ang isang Ythaniel Delos Reyes? Well, my mom and his dad got married ten years ago, so that means I and Ythaniel became step-siblings ten years ago. My mom and my real dad annulled their marriage when I was nine years old because Dad had an affair with his best friend. I was so down at that time. I didn’t want to have a broken family, but seeing my mother crying every night because of my father, broke my heart.

Kung paanong ayaw kong magkaroon ng pamilyang hindi buo, ganoon din ang kagustuhan kong maging masaya si Mommy. So I respected her decision. I came with her and left my dad with hatred in my heart.

After one year with my mom, she finally introduced me to her new love, and that was Daddy Xyril, Ythaniel’s father. I didn’t like him at first, but he showed me how much he loved my mother, so I accepted him. And after a month, they got married.

On their wedding day, Daddy Xyril introduced me to his son, Ythaniel. Ythaniel is two years older than me. He was so serious that time, and I was so scared of him. But when I was left alone with him that day, he proved me wrong. He may be cold on the outside, but he’s a good man inside. From that day, he always protected me whenever I was in trouble. We became close, and eventually I started calling him “Brother,” and he called me “Little Sissy.”

His mom died after giving birth to him, which made Daddy Xyril a single dad. They were both so good to me, so I gave back the love that they gave to me. I’m happy with my family right now, and I don’t want to ruin it because of some issues.

Alam kong hindi pwede, pero inaamin ko… I like my brother, not because he’s my brother, but because he is the kind of man I’ve always dreamed to be with. I like him as a man, and not as my brother.

It’s so hard to hide my feelings for him when he’s near me, but I’m doing my best — for the best. And I hope I’m doing well. Imagine how hard it is to contain these feelings when he’s doing things that make my heart beat faster than normal.

I hope that these feelings I have for him will fade away soon, because I don’t know if I can take it anymore. I’ve been hiding it for seven years now, and I’m afraid to accept the fact that it’s growing deeper and deeper as time passes by.

I know that we don’t have the same feelings for each other. He sees me as his little sister. No more, no less. While I’m here, having romantic feelings for him. How I wish he hadn’t become my brother, so I could express my feelings for him freely. I envy those girls who have the freedom to say how much they love, like, and admire my brother.

While me? I can touch him, hold him, bond with him… but I can’t express my feelings. And that’s the most painful part for me.

Maybe this is the sign I need to set aside this forbidden feeling. Maybe I need to forget what I feel for him. Maybe I need to give my attention to another man out there. Maybe… just maybe… this feeling will fade away this time. And I hope I made the right decision. I hope I’ll be happy with it.

Naramdaman ko ang pagbagsak ng mga luha ko kaya agad ko itong pinunasan. Tumayo ako mula sa pagkakahilata sa kama at kinuha ang basong nilagyan niya ng gatas kanina bago ako lumabas ng silid at naglakad pababa. Nauuhaw ako kaya kailangan kong uminom ng tubig.

Dahan-dahan akong bumaba ng hagdanan dahil madilim na ang buong mansion. Tulog na ata ang lahat ng tao dito at ako na lang ang gising. I was walking slowly to the kitchen when I bumped into someone. A masculine arm wrapped around my waist, then someone pulled me close to him. I could smell his manly scent, and right there — again — I could feel my heart beating faster than normal.

“B-Brother?” I asked.

“Asheng? Where are you going?” He let go of me, then turned on the light switch in the living room. Yes, we were in the living room because the doorway to the kitchen is at the right side.

“I was about to go to the kitchen. Nauuhaw kasi ako,” saad ko sa kanya. Tumingin siya sa akin at kinuha ang basong hawak ko, bago ako hinawakan sa pulsuhan at hinila papasok sa kusina.

Pinaupo niya ako sa isang stool at lumapit sa ref. Binuksan niya ito at nagsalin ng tubig sa isang bagong baso na kinuha niya sa cupboard.

“Akala ko ba tulog ka na?” biglang tanong niya, bahagyang nakatingin sa akin habang binabalik ang pitsel sa loob ng ref.

“I was imagining some things when suddenly I felt thirsty, so I decided to go here to drink some water,” sagot ko habang pinaglalaruan ang mga daliri ko. Lumapit siya sa akin at inabot ang basong may tubig. Tinanggap ko ito at ininom.

“May switch ng ilaw sa tabi ng hagdan. You should turn on the light before walking around. Paano kung ‘di kita nasalo kanina? E di nadapa ka na,” panenermon niya. Imbis na mainis, kinilig pa ako. See? Sino ang ‘di mahuhulog sa kanya kapag ganyan ang ugali niya?

Matamis ko siyang nginitian. “Thank you for that, Brother. You don’t need to scold me,” sagot ko na lang.

“Still a brat,” he said, then took the glass away from me and placed it on the sink.

“Let’s go. You need to rest,” sabi niya sabay hila muli sa akin, at inihatid ako sa silid ko.

“Go inside and rest,” utos niya. Kaya binuksan ko ang pinto ng silid ko bago siya hinarap.

“Good night again, Bro,” saad ko. Sinara ko ang pinto, naglakad palapit sa kama ko, at humiga. I need to rest. May klase pa ako bukas.