Darrell

CHAPTER 4

“I saw her,”

I said, barging into my best friend's house in the middle of the night.

“Saw who?” He frowned as he detangled himself from the hot brunette he was just sucking face with.

*Meghan. She was at the awards show.”

“Meghan, your ex?”

“Yes, Meghan my ex…” I said, pacing his living room, trying to calm my racing heart.

“Um, can you excuse us, Melissa. I'll be with you shortly,”

Cain said to one of his many girlfriends.

“Sure thing, baby. Hurry back in though,” she said and made her way into one of the rooms in the condo.

“Sit down.”

Cain pulled me towards his dining room and fiddled around in his fridge. He took out a bottle of whiskey and two whiskey glasses and poured us a drink.

“Drink.” He slid my whiskey over to me and I took a huge gulp.

“What was she doing at the event?”

Cain finally asked.

“She was one of the business owners that won an award.”

“Oh.”

“That's not all.” I looked up at him, taking another gulp.

“She… she mentioned Sarah…”

“Shit, shit. Man, I'm so sorry.”

Cain patted my back.

“Our daughter… It's been two years but the look in her eyes when she'd dedicated her award to her…”

I was doing my best not to cry but my eyes were starting to sting.

When I'd heard about my little angel's death two years ago, I had wanted to come out of hiding just to comfort Meh but I knew how dangerous that was. I couldn't go to her. She hated me now, it was obvious and clear in the way she'd looked into my eyes like I was some vermin.

“I'm so sorry, man.” Cain's voice echoed in my ears.

“Were you able to talk to her?” Cain asked after a long stretch of silence.

“I tried but she.. she um, slapped me. She wanted nothing to do with me.”

“I'm sorry man, but can you blame her? You left her for years without a single explanation.”

“I know, I know, fuck!” I stood up, running my hands through my hair, feeling too many emotions bubbling inside of me.

“What are you going to do?” He asked.

“What else can I do? I need to talk to her. I want her back.”

Cain scoffed. “You can't be serious. Look, I don't mean to rain on your parade but that's not a good idea, at least not right now.”

Cain was right but after years of pinning over Megan and finally being free to come for her, I needed to talk to her. I needed to explain my side of the story.

“Then what do I do?” I asked, feeling defeated.

“You'll chill for a bit and let her breathe, let her process things. I don't imagine she was very happy to see you tonight.”

“She hit me,” I admitted.

“Well, can you actually blame her?” Cain shook his head.

“No.” I answered, feeling my stomach churn.

The image of how she'd looked at me in shock from the podium when she had received her award had caused my heart to skip several beats.

I had not realized she would be there. Hell, the only reason I had gone was because of Silas, my half brother. I had only just gotten back to America a day ago and I had already gone to Meghan's old place but she wasn't there. Apparently she'd moved out two years ago after the accident.

Sarah, my little girl. I still had her picture in my wallet and I took it everywhere.

The day I had found out about what had happened, I had wanted to give it all up and gone to Sarah but I couldn't. I was stuck between protecting Sarah and my family and risking her life. The reason I had disappeared was to protect them. It was the reason I had filed for a divorce and placed it on our dining table, hoping she'd sign it.

Bile rose up my mouth and I felt the urge to scream.

“I need a moment alone” I said to Cain when I began to feel the stinging pain of unshed tears in my throat and it was starting to clog up.

It was like this every time I thought about her.

“Sure man, I'll be in my room. Let me know when you need me,” Cain said. He took one gulp of his whiskey before leaving the room.

I took out Sarah's picture from my wallet and stared at my little girl, my heart aching. I still had not been able to reconcile the fact that I was never going to see her again. I just couldn't.

I didn't want to believe she was gone. There was still a part of me that wanted to believe that all of this was a dream.

It was my fault. Everything happening right now was my fault. My family's destruction was nobody's fault but mine.

Tears gathered in my eyes as I pictured Sarah crying for her mama and me and as Meghan was probably crying every night for me. She was dealing with my disappearance alone as our daughter's death.

There wasn't a single day that I had gone by that I wasn't thinking of both my girls.

Not a single night that I wasn't praying to be reunited with them, with Megan. Why couldn't she understand how much I needed her?

“I'm so sorry, baby girl.” I whispered, wiping my eyes and kissing the picture of Sarah.

I knew I was never going to get over her or the fact that she was gone because of me.

I was probably never going to forgive myself either. I couldn't but I wanted to tell my little girl that I was sorry. I wanted to go to her grave but I had no idea where she'd been buried and Meghan won't talk to me.

How on earth was she coping?

I needed to know how she'd been able to do it. To grieve alone. I still cried every night.

I wasn't sure how long I had stayed in the dining room for but when Cain had come back wearing a robe, I was sure it had been a while.

“You okay, man?” he asked and I nodded, wiping my eyes.

“Yeah,” I lied, not seeing the point in saying no. It was clear as day.

He knew I wasn't fine and I probably wouldn't be fine for a while. He'd been one of the people that had helped me through my grief.

“Okay… are you staying over? I can order something and we can eat and watch something to try and distract you…”

“I don't want to be distracted, Cain. I want Meghan back.” I said firmly…

“Well, you aren't going to get her back today so you might as well distract yourself.”

He was right but u didn't want distraction, I wanted to feel my pain and wallow in self pity for as long as I could.

Just then, a thought crossed my mind and I looked up at Cain.

“Meghan was with a man tonight. Do you know anything about that?”

“Yeah… Daniel Luthor.”

Cain shrugged.

“Who is he to her? Is her boyfriend?” I asked, trying not to be upset even though it hurt.

Cain fell silent, avoiding eye contact with Mr and I frowned.

“Cain?” I questioned with narrowed gaze.

“I'm not sure how to tell you this man or how true it is but that man is not her boyfriend.”

“Then who the fuck is he?’

“Darrell…” he trailed off

“Go on, Cain?!” he said firmly!

Cain swallowed. “Her husband… he is her husband.”