Riding in Lust
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Was lust equal to love or greater. She hates him yet her body sings at his touch, She despises him yet eager to warm his bed at night. Rayna couldn’t love the bad guy but she could want him, right? Sex was no longer enough for Carlos. He wanted Rayna’s body. As well as her heart. Theproblem was how to go about it.
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Riding in Lust Taking and giving
“Who was her father to you?” I asked Carlos later that evening. Curiosity had been eating me out, but I wanted to act mature and simple, so I initially decided not to ask.It wasn’t late but after the drama that had happened that day, everyone had retreated early, and Carlos went to our room with me.I wasn’t sleepy so I sat on the bed while he lay down with his eyes closed. He opened them when he heard my question.“I like to think of him as my sponsor.” He replied, sitting up and looking into my eyes.“Sponsor?” Why is that? “I wasn't expecting that answer, of all things.”“When I left home. He was the one who took me in.” Carlos said simply.“Wait! Did you run away from home? From your dad? Frank?” I was shocked. “Why am I always the last to hear things like this? You only tell me the boring stuff.” I whined.He smiled and pulled me close, placing a kiss on my forehead. “I tell you all the important stuff.” I was distracted for a moment when he kissed my forehead. Not because of t
Riding in Lust His detailed explanation.
The whole rest of the day was grim. Carlos disappeared into his study after Anna’s uncle left. He didn’t look without a plan so I was a bit at ease, but my heart went up again when I concluded that even if my husband had his back on the wall, lost and hopeless, I would never find out by merely looking at his face.Zade just stayed quiet watching over us while Anna refused to talk. She faced the wall and chewed on her lips.Coco was having her own great time eating the snacks I had bought her and said nothing too.I hated being like this, just being a spectator, watching the whole drama unfold. I wanted to be in the drama, I wanted to play an important role.“Why did you guys bring Anna back?” I asked Zade in frustration. All these would have been avoided if they had simply left her there till she was eighteen. From what I saw and heard; she was doing very well there. She had her life in order and wasn’t too willing to come back. It was her love for Zane that had manipulated her to com
Riding in Lust An unwanted visitor.
The drive was slower than Anna would have preferred because Zade kept warning her to keep watch and yelping whenever she swerved. I wondered where she had learned how to drive, she held the wheels with certain confidence while I had never been in the driver’s seat. He kept warning me to make a park and drive himself, I understand how unsteady he felt because it was very likely his first time he was being driven, and wasn’t used to sitting in the passenger seat. I buckled his seatbelt and told him to stay put but he still looked in pain and under torture. Anna had to drive calmly and carefully before he finally let her be. We made one stop to buy Coco’s favorite muffin and then we drove straight home. They smelled nice and were tempting enough for us to make an unplanned stop. “We should do this more often,” I said as we began to head home, I loved being outside. I also missed my husband, I wanted to go on a walk with him. I wanted to hold his hands a walk boldly in the street with
Riding in Lust A race before the race.
I looked around to find Zade looking at us. “No, not here. I guess you do not want Zane to know about it?” I murmured back. She nodded her head in agreement. “If we talk here, there’s a 75% chance he’d find out what we said. For not, let’s shop for other things.” Eventually, we got only one necklace for Anna, nothing there suited my taste. I had wanted something to get my mom’s necklace from my mind so I could confidently reject it but everything I saw was lacking. We stopped at a café to eat burgers and tea. Then we decided to take a walk. Zade grumbled at the idea but eventually gave it. I was the boss’ woman. This felt good. I made sure there was good enough distance between Zade and us, I also did well to ensure he was walking behind us, that way, he would feel more at ease as he watched us, and not be alert enough to catch on to whatever Anna wanted to tell me. For the first fifteen minutes, we didn’t talk about anything important, we passed a park and waved at dogs and kid
Riding in Lust An extended protection.
For the first time since we got to Atlanta, I woke to see my husband still sleeping right beside me. I first checked if he was awake or still sleeping. “Carlos?” I called, his eyes didn’t flutter at my words, nor did his fingers move. He was asleep. I moved closer and watched their features, his flawless and handsome face. Something squeezed in my heart as I thought of having a son who looked just like his father. As handsome and perfect. Tall and sweet. My fingers played lightly over his face, his jaw, memorizing every slide and arc. My movements were light and feathery as I didn’t want to wake him up. I moved the duvet slightly lower, revealing my new asset of infatuation. His chest. But as soon as I placed my hands on him to explore, his hands came up to capture mine. “Don’t even think of it.” He threatened. “You were awake.” I accused with a gasp, subtly distracting him. “You have never woken up before me.” He snorted. Looking at me with those clear eyes. His eyes were sear
Riding in Lust He loved me first.
I gave a sly smile; it was a big turn-on for both of us to act all innocent. “What did I do?” Slowly grinding myself against his erection.I was learning more about myself too. Now that I’ve decided to look at the positive sides of things, I was going to accept that I wasn’t a good girl either. Sleeping in separate rooms from Carlos had just been me trying to overcome my attraction to him, to cower away. I had thought giving in would mean letting him win. How had I forgotten that I could win like this too? Even if I lost, would I count the pleasures he offered as loss? There was no loser. But there was a dominant, and I wanted to be it. To take control.“Fuck Rayna.” He growled, digging into my hips to stop my movement and keep me in place. I loved the strength in his hands and the assurance that he would never turn them against me. If he could, he would have done so a long time ago, I knew how much I had frustrated and misunderstood him. I was going to make it all back to him.“What?
Riding in Lust Lust in love
“Fuck, I’ve missed you, Rayna.” Carlos pulled me into his arms he crushed his lips against mine, pulling me to rest totally on him as his fingers dug into my skin.My white dress was pulled up as Carlos grabbed my ass, grinding me against his hard-on, showing me how much he wanted me.It touched me how badly he was hot for me but would put his needs behind mine, my husband who had put me first in everything.My fingers were not inactive either as I got rid of his shirt buttons, I was out of patience to remove the shirt completely as my fingers dived against his skin. My husband’s flawless skin. I missed this.His hands were everywhere, reaching for my breasts, “Let’s get rid of this.” He muttered, pulling my hands off his skin to take the dress off my head. Revealing all my flesh to his eyes.I was as naked as the day I was born. The fire in his eyes fueled my need for him. When I reached for him again, he held my hands to stop me.“I can’t control myself if you’re touching me and I n
Riding in Lust A love confession.
I opened my mouth and was unable to close it back, I had no response for that unexpected confession. So, I decided to take it as a joke.“Don’t play with me Carlos,” I warned, I couldn’t even laugh at his words. How much had I hoped to be loved? It was a very sore spot.“Why don’t you believe me?” He replied bitterly. “Why are you so stubborn? All you see are the negative things, don’t you see how much your father is struggling to make right all his wrongs? Why can’t you see how much I love you and how I care so much about you? Why haven’t you noticed that I can’t be without you, that I can’t stay away from you for long? Why do you think I’m always coming back to you?” He ranted.Then let go of me to bring a box that had been sitting on the table. “Here. Your dad wanted me to give you this.”I looked at the box, unable to move my hands to take it or open it. His words were still ringing in my ears.Did he love me? Why would I not help but doubt his affection for me? It would have been
Riding in Lust The love confession
“Everything that happened is now in the past, you have to forget them and move on. Listen to what he has to say so you can get it all off your mind. So, you can forgive him. I’ve talked to him a lot these past few days and there’s a lot of things you do not know about your father, Rayna.”I shifted off his arms at that. “Do you support him; you also would abandon me because I have no value? Do you think I would die?” I cried.I hated how rational my brain was being, how I was trying to understand despite the pain in my heart. How could the men in my life think of me as a person that wouldn’t last? “Do you also think I would be gone soon? Already making plans for my absence. Have you found a wife to replace me? Or you’ve decided to run a full check, up on your next wife to be sure she can give you children?” I ranted.I used all my energy to stand up, so I could at least be away from him, his scent, his handsome face from up close were making me tear up but moving away didn’t help at a
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