Chapter 6

"He is not who I am."

I was startled awake by the sound of a low voice. I was so tired that it just hit me that I fell asleep in the class. I looked around while dabbing at the corner of my eyes that was filling up with tears and wiped away the rest of it. Napansin kong ako na lang ang naiwan sa classroom. So it was only a dream the whole time? Was I just dreaming of Professor Sybill?

I felt a huge amount of sadness in my chest; even my throat was being blocked by something. My loneliness is suffocating me.

"It looks like you're awake now."

I almost leaped when I heard a voice coming from behind me. Nang lingunin ko ito, I found Professor Ismael seated behind me on the chair. He was looking at me.

"You came to my class intoxicated and late, and all you did was nod off," litanya niya. I heaved a sigh. Para akong nawalan ng enerhiya at tinamad na makipagtalo sa kaniya. Masyado akong kinain ng hinagpis dahil sa panaginip ko kanina, idagdag pa ang pantasyang hindi ko na mararanasan sa tunay na buhay.

"Sorry," I apologized, na ikinagulat niya.

Napatikhim siya bago humalukipkip. He was looking at me intently while he placed his left leg over his right leg. Is he trying to scrutinize me?

"Don't throw away your life for a man who isn't worth it. He's just a useless man."

My eyebrows quickly rose. Nagsisimula na naman ba siya? Humingi na nga ako ng tawad, hindi ba?

"Useless? Are you talking about Professor Sybill?"

He merely gave a shrug. "Why? Is he the man you're dating? Is he the reason why you are rebelling against me?" he inquired with a grin on his face. "Is he that useless man?" I find it offensive when he talks about him in that manner. Nakakairita! Pinakukulo niya talaga ang dugo ko.

As I struggled to get away, I clenched my fist and sucked my teeth. Pasensyahan na lang. Nananahimik na ako, nagsimula na naman siyang asarin ako.

My head is still throbbing, and the presence of this man is making my vertigo significantly worse.

"Anong karapatan mo para sabihing walang kwenta si Professor Sybill? Bakit? Mas magaling ma ba sa kaniya?" I couldn't help but raise the volume of my voice. Even though there is no one else in the room, I get the impression that the conversation that the two of us are having is getting more heated.

"Mas magaling? Oo," sambit niya sabay ngisi. "Bakit? Saan ba siya magaling? Ano bang tinutukoy mo? Sa Calculus o sa kama?"

Nagpanting ang tainga ko. Ganito ba ang kapalit ng hindi niya pagpuna kanina sa akin? Raratsadahan niya ako ng pang-iinsulto?

"Mas magaling ako both," dagdag pa niya.

"Wala akong pakialam! Tsaka pwede ba? Huwag mong ikumpara sa 'yo ang taong mahal ko! Hindi mo siya matutumbasan! Ni hindi ka lumagpas sa isang guhit!"

He let out a laugh. "Love? Are you quite certain that you love him? Do you even know what love is?"

I couldn't help but scowl. Wala na bang ibang lalabas sa bibig niya kung pangmamaliit ng tao. Sa totoo lang, gusto ko na siyang sakalin dahil pinapuputok niya ang litid ko sa noo at leeg. "Of course, I know what love is! What right do you have to question my feelings? Bakit, ikaw? Alam mo ba ang salitang pagmamahal? Puro lumalabas sa bibig mo ay kung paano saktan ang isang tao!"

He got to his feet and started walking in my direction. He did not change the expression he was giving me, which made me feel as though he was laughing at me. "I am aware of the distinction that exists between love and lust. I have no doubt that what you feel for him is nothing more than lust, just as he likely feels about you."

As my lungs burned with rage, I was compelled to slap his face indignantly. "Wala kang alam sa nararamdaman ko!" nanginginig kong sambit.

It took some time before he switched his attention back to me after my slap turned his face to look in a different direction.

Pero dahil sa ginawa ko, mas lalong lumalim at dumilim ang paraan ng pagtingin niya sa akin. Wala na ang ngisi sa mga labi niya. Galit na siya.

"I definitely know what you feel." He grabbed my wrist, which caused me to feel suffocated and furious at the same time. Because of the way that he dismissed me and my most precious emotions, I can feel the beginnings of new tears welling up in my eyes. Hindi niya ba alam na ang pagmamahal ko ay puno ng paghihintay? Dahil kung hindi ko mahal si Professor Sybill, bakit ko sasayangin ang buhay ko sa pagiging tanga? At sinasabi niyang libog lang ito? Ni hindi nga namin iyon madalas gawin. Kung alam niya lang ang totoong nangyari, hindi niya ako huhusgahan nang ganito.

"Wala kang alam! Hindi mo alam ang pagmamahal!" I yelled and reached out to grab my hand back to slap him again, but he was more powerful than me and prevented me from doing so.

"What does love is?" Ngumisi siya at tiningnan ako nang deretso na para bang nanghahamon. "I'll make you feel it the second you attempt to slap me again, Miss Alvandra. And I will slap you back harder to the part you will be disgraced. This is my last warning."

Due to my extreme disgust at this freaking individual, I found myself clenching my teeth and uttering numerous rounds of profanities. Pero hindi ako nakapagsalita nang sumabat pa siya.

"What kind of professor is he to have a relationship with his student? Isn't that what a useless man does? Taking advantage of his weak student," he keeps on blurting out bullshit.

"I am not weak," I said to him while still attempting to free myself from his firm hold on my arm. "I know what I am doing. He's not taking advantage of me. Mahal niya ako."

He smirked. "Then where is he at this time? Sigurado ka bang mahal ka niya? Sigurado ka bang gusto niyang makasama ang isang tulad mo?" He stated this to me, adding, "Even I don't like girls who act like brats."

Lalong nag-usok ang ilong ko. Pinagmumukha niya ba akong tanga. Oo, hindi ko siya gusto pero para sabihin sa akin ang mga salitang iyon...hindi niya ba alam na nakakasakit na siya?

"Are you sure about that?" I inquired while simultaneously attempting to reclaim the throne that he was working so hard to steal from me. It is never the King who exercises authority; rather, it is the Queen. And it is I.

"That you won't fall for me?"

He moved in closer and pressed his mouth against my ear. I could hear him taking long breaths, and the sensation of his breath on my neck gave me a tingly feeling. "I am not Sybill Enciso, Miss Alvandra. I am aware of what it is that I desire, and it is definitely not you."

I gulped down, but it's not because I'm admitting defeat. No more ceasefire between us. I'm bringing it on.

I looked up to him. Our eyes met. Napakalapit lang ng pagitan naming dalawa at kahit ganito kalapit ay hindi ako naaakit. Kahit pa naaamoy ko ang mabango niyang hininga.

I grabbed hold of his necktie to prevent him from escaping. Bago ako magsalita, I ensure that the words my lovely lips would utter would leave an impression on his cock.

"Don't talk too much, Professor. I am Jothea Alvandra, and I have the power to make you desire me and even become obsessed with me." I cautioned him while maintaining a seductive tone. I stole a quick glimpse in his direction before I licked his lips sexily. I smirked as I shoved him before walking away.

Ismael Mondalla, you'll definitely regret this.