登入NIKOLAI
I wrinkle my nose as I drag the body across the basement floor and onto the middle of the large nylon. Sweat rolls down my face, dripping onto the floor and my muscles strain from the effort. “I could use a little help here, Caleb,” I mutter to my annoying brother as he stands there and watches me. “This is all your doing, anyway.” Caleb stretches, the material of his dark shirt riding up and exposing his tight abs. He runs a hand through his bleached blonde hair, the metal of his eyebrow piercings glinting in the light. “Exactly. This is all my doing. I’m a little tired from doing all the work. I’m sure you’ve got it all under control.” Irritation burns in my chest as I glance at him. “Tired from what exactly? From fucking up as usual?” Caleb straightens and his dark eyes narrow. “Watch your fucking tone, Nikolai. You of all people don’t get to talk to me like that.” “Why? It’s the truth, isn’t it? We’re all here because you fucked up.” River, my other brother approaches from behind, carrying a large body bag in his gloved hand. He drops the bag on the floor with a dull thud and adds, “Again.” A small chuckle escapes me as Caleb bristles. River watches him in that cold, detached way of his, his icy blue eyes assessing. “You always take his side, River. As expected. When will someone take my side?” he whines. “When you stop fucking up,” River and I say at the same time. Caleb huffs and leans against the wall, crossing his arms. He was such a child. You’d think he was the youngest brother. “But I have to admit, you did really well, Caleb,” River says as he looks down at the body on the floor. “Silas isn’t an easy target and yet you took him down so quickly.” Caleb’s eyes brighten and he visibly preens under River’s praise. “Thank you. At least, someone—” he shoots me a pointed look and I roll my eyes. “— appreciates my efforts around here.” I scoff. “Oh, don’t make his ego bigger than it already is, River. Just look at the mess he made.” We all look down at the body lying motionlessly on the clear nylon bag. His tattered white shirt is completely covered with blood and there are several cuts of varying sizes on his exposed skin. A large knife juts out from the centre of his chest. Another one juts out from his right thigh. River sighs. “Yeah. This is going to require a lot of work.” I purse my lips as I study the body. Too much damage. Too messy. Too careless. “How does one make such a mess anyway?” “Hey,” Caleb points a finger at me. “You heard River. He wasn’t easy. Just be grateful I got the job done and the bastard is dead.” He huffs and marches over to the corner to grab gloves. “Besides,” he continues as he puts them on. “This is not how I operate. I told Derek I don’t do well with close contact but he wouldn’t listen to me. Now look what happened. I don’t know why he didn’t choose either one of you.” “Because I was having a crisis at the company,” River says, grabbing a saw. “This week alone, I had to travel across three different continents.” “I don’t know why you can’t just quit,” Caleb mumbles. “Because,” River says patiently as if speaking to a toddler. “We all have images to uphold. No matter how stressful they are.” He’s right. Everybody had a role outside of… this. Well, everyone except for Caleb. It’s the only way to avoid getting caught. It’s the perfect cover. No one looked too closely at a CEO or a university student or a professor. “And I’ve been busy this entire week too, so I couldn’t do it,” I say. I grunt as I shift the body more toward the centre. Caleb snorts. “Busy with what exactly? Fucking your way through the entire school? Your reputation precedes you, dear brother.” “Busy with a project,” I snap, as I accept the saw and goggles that River hands me. Something burns in my chest. I hate to admit it but Caleb has perfectly mastered the way to get under my skin. He shrugs. “If you say so.” River hands him a saw and goggles and he takes them, putting the goggles on. “We can’t all be jobless like you,” I snipe. But even as I say that, I know it’s not entirely the truth. Caleb might be unemployed to the public eye but he still had a role to play in our group. Despite the way he looks with the multiple tattoos and the piercings, Caleb is actually very smart. As much as it hurts me to admit. He’s in charge of research work and is very good with computers. He also has a laboratory in the family mansion. A lab where he cooks up some of the deadliest poisons known to man. He ignores my jab and wrinkles his nose as he looks down. “This is why I don’t do knives. Poisons are more my style. It’s easier, more efficient and less… messy.” “Can we stop complaining and just get to work?” River grunts. He presses a button on the saw and the device comes to life. After that, there are no more words exchanged as we get to work on chopping the body into little pieces that would be easy to get rid of.NIKOLAIHe shrugs. “Why do that when you always deliver?” There’s a slight pause. “Until now, anyway.”He glances at the sketchbook on my desk.This time, his expression shifts slightly into something less teasing and more thoughtful.“Be careful,” he says lightly, though there’s something under it. “You’re starting to look a little… invested.”“I’m not,” I reply immediately.It’s too quick and his lips twitch.“I didn’t say you were,” he says. “I said you’re starting to look like it.”He hesitates for a second before he goes on, “I just don’t want you getting obsessed. You know what happens when you do. I don’t want a repeat of last time.”I tense slightly. “Drop it, Caleb.”“All I’m saying is, I don’t want to have to handle another dead body—”I grit my teeth. “I. Said. Drop. It.”Something in my tone must get to him because he finally shuts up.He watches me for a second longer while I try to ignore the burning sensation in my chest. How dare he even bring that up?My fingers curl
NIKOLAIThe door to my room bursts open.I don’t look up from my sketchbook even as irritation rises in my chest, sharp and fast. I already know who it is.It’s the lavender. It always gives him away. His ex-girlfriend gifted him that shampoo but they broke up years ago. I still don’t know why he refuses to let it go and keeps buying more.It’s not love— I don’t think Caleb is capable of it. It’s something else. Something he refuses to tell me anytime I ask him about it.Which is surprising. Caleb doesn’t keep secrets. I sigh. “Do you ever knock?”Caleb jumps on my bed, jostling me slightly. “Why would I? You should know me already, dear brother.”He lays on the bed, resting on his elbows, his legs swinging in the air behind him.I rub my hands along my temples, feeling the beginnings of a headache. Caleb always has that effect.Sometimes, I wish I could trade him for someone else. Another brother, maybe.“Yes, I do know. I know you’re annoying, insufferable—”“Wow. Don’t complimen
NIKOLAIControl.It’s a word that has been ingrained in me for years. A word Derek never fails to mention.It’s a language I’m very fluent in.I pride myself on control. On not letting anything affect me.It’s the only thing that matters. I learned that early on, before I even had a name for the sharp, suffocating feeling that came with losing it. Back when everything was louder, messier, unpredictable in ways that left irrevocable damage behind.Now I know better.Control isn't a restriction. It’s freedom.It’s not just about restraint, it’s about precision. Choosing exactly what to show and what to withhold. Knowing that silence can be louder than words, that stillness can draw more attention than movement.That people can fill in the gaps themselves.And when they do, they hand you power. Over themselves, over everything.People like to pretend that their impulses make them real, honest. That giving in to whatever they feel in the moment is somehow admirable.It isn’t.It makes the
JULIAN My breath stutters. “I’m not—” “You are. You don’t like me,” he says simply. There’s no offense in his tone. He just sounds certain. Like he's figured it all out. It throws me off slightly. Because he’s right. I shouldn’t like him. I don’t like him. He hurt Theo. He’s cold. Detached. Dangerous. Everything about him pushes me away. “That doesn’t mean I can’t talk to you,” I combat, lifting my chin. I can quit and run right now but I’m not going to. I’m stronger than that. His gaze sharpens. “Why?” There it is again. Another question. Direct and unavoidable. He asks a lot of questions, doesn’t he? It’s always what or why with him. Why? Because Theo asked me to. Because I need to make you fall for me. Because I’m supposed to break you. The answers pile up in my head, heavy and suffocating. I can’t say any of them. So I say the only thing I can. “I don’t know.” And it’s partly the truth. Because as much as everything about Nikolai p
JULIANI force my voice to remain steady and try again. “I just wanted to apologize. For what I said at the party. I didn’t mean to call you arrogant and all that. I guess I was a little tipsy.”This was Theo’s idea, me apologizing. After I told him everything that happened at the party, Theo thought I was a little too rude for Nikolai’s tastes. He said Nikolai likes his men well-behaved.Well-behaved. Like I’m a robot. Or a doll he can mold to his liking.Ugh.But Theo wants this, so…Nikolai folds his arms, the action making his biceps bulge through the tight, black T-shirt he’s wearing.“You don’t have to apologize,” he says calmly. “I thought it was fun.”Fun. Like I’d been putting on a comedy show.I want to snap at him and ask him who the hell he thinks he is to be so patronizing but I resist. Barely. My smile widens instead.“Still, I feel like we got off on the wrong foot.” I stretch out a hand. “Julian. That’s my name.”He tilts his head, ignoring my outstretched hand. “I al
JULIANI wipe my sweaty hands on my jeans as I stare at Nikolai standing a few feet ahead, my heart pounding.I don’t think I can do this.I don’t think I can make him fall in love with me.Even after the ‘prep’ Theo has given me over the week, complete with whiteboards and pointers and all, I don’t feel confident I can succeed.Theo didn’t have much information to give me about him anyway. Just that Nikolai preferred to chase and I shouldn’t be so obvious. He also told me to be less awkward and be more confident.Yeah, I have a feeling I’m going to fuck that one up.My chest tightens the longer I stare at him.I’m feeling the exact way I felt on the two occasions I’ve seen him now.There’s this awareness I have around him. It’s almost like instinct. Like something deep inside me is already bracing for impact.Nikolai stands near the edge of the Arts building, speaking to someone I don’t recognize. His posture is relaxed, one hand tucked into his pocket, the other loosely holding his







