The Luna Who Wants Everything

Over the past few weeks I’ve learned an awful lot. None of it good. My mind continues to whirl with a sickening combination of regret mixed with bitterness. Beta Zeka is still tearing through the countryside whilst I cling onto the back trying to remember the last time I ate a meal.My back-from-the-dead brother Nikolai and Alpha Cillian have combined forces to attack Phillipe and Ruth. The only blessing has been that she is trapped in the north. Who knows what Phillipe has been up to every time he left me to go visit her there. Since I came home with his one-eyed henchman Beta Patrick with the declaration of war ringing loud he has been stuck at the Rising Star castle with me. Forced to be with the mate he doesn’t want.“Why won’t you just reject me?” I screamed at him one evening. The ridiculousness of sitting across a dining table with my so-called mate burned me. Knowing war was ongoing left me bubbling with resentment and unable to hold back my tongue.“Because I can provide for

Two days of living in a barn. It might be a much nicer barn than most but this is ridiculous. Bella fetches me the most delicious home-cooked meals but keeps a shy distance. Lucien says absolutely nothing to me. It is like being guarded by a grizzly bear.Beta Zeke remains, doing his best to annoy me. He is always nagging at Finn to put more effort into guarding me, which then leads to him being a pissed-off grump. Not that I want to talk to him either. I don’t do anything. I just lie on the bed and regret every decision that lead me here.Finn busies himself with wood carving, reading, whatever on the floor below. I look up through the skylight and remember the life I’ve abandoned. I can see the sunset just colouring the sky, the most spectacular burning orange as I lie back in the huge pillows.Goddess the huge glamorous dances my family used to hold. I look down at my nails, all scrubbed, short and plain and remember the jewels and bracelets I used to wear. I would be covered in t

I thought being back amongst my comrades would help shake off this funk. I’m back in the Battalion, alongside Alpha Cillian. Beta Briss and myself are his two most senior men.Just downhill are twenty others waiting instructions, another twenty half a mile away. Alpha Cillian has other Beta’s but they are not known to the other nations. Mainly because they are women. Naomi and Leona Kharkov are running the home defence. Alpha Cillian is full of pride for them. Well we all are, that whole family are like my sisters. All copper-haired, dark-eyes beauties, they lost their legendary father the same night I lost Franz. That fucking Ceremony. Fast asleep when-/Back to business. Shut it down/ Rush urged as my heart twinged in pain.When Cillian gets letters from Alpha Nikolai complaining he is having to divert men from fighting in order to organise home resistance he grins and shakes his head. The decades old measure of secretly training our women in martial arts and vicious shifter defenc

Phillipe has come for me. Howls and sickening sounds of pain soon followed as I hid with Bella. Lucien and Finn eventually dragged back the tattered bodies of two Beta’s from Rising Star to see if I could identify them. I couldn't. I’d barely been lived at Rising Star. The best I could offer was that their purple shoulder tattoo matched one of Beta Patrick’s. The pouch of wolfsbane-bane laced syringes strapped to the body of one confirmed their intent. “So at least two people in Rising Star knew you were here,” Lucien grunted before grabbing two shovels, throwing one towards Finn. Both panted heavily, covered in rough bleeding scratch marks. “What now then?” I asked, shivering despite the sun. Huge teeth marks surrounded one entire shoulder, almost wrenching it clean off. The other was missing the vast majority of his torso, with fresh red and beige gore glinting in the sun. Their legs bent at angles that made my stomach churn, ruby blood seeping onto the path. “We bury them. H

I don’t really know if Zeke had the authority to promise houses, thousands of reals of gold and even a boat to one guy. He promised whatever each man valued their own life at, swearing on Alpha Cillian’s honour they would be paid. It was not lost on me as the grubby, grasping demands rolled in that Zeke was fighting purely for his pack. For the honour and survival of Shadowlands. I doubt my father, Alpha Alexander would be so generous for just over a dozen rough, surly looking hulks. Zeke seemed to know what he was doing. My mother, well she would have probably just ripped one of the fighters eyes out and made the rest fall into line. She’s quite full-on when she wants to be. When she’s not wallowing in a pit of self-hatred anyway. When people say I remind them of her I always scoff. I see her weaknesses in me sadly, not her strengths. I’m forced to tune back into the conversation as Zeke finishes scribbling down his agreed commitments to each of the fighters. Some shake hands vigo