Giving up has never been an option…. While fighting for his life and freedom has become commonplace for Alpha Cole Redmen, the battle for both hits a whole new level once he finally returns to the place he’s never called home. When his fight to escape results in dissociative amnesia, Cole must overcome one obstacle after another to get to the place he only knows about in his dreams. Will he follow his dreams and find his way home or will he get lost along the way? Join Cole on his emotional journey, inspiring change, as he fights to return to Crimson Dawn. *This is the second book in the Crimson Dawn series. This series is best read in order starting with The Son of Red Fang. **Content warning, this book contains descriptions of physical and sexual abuse that sensitive readers may find disturbing. For adult readers only.
view moreFriday July 20th, 2018; 9pm
(Cole’s POV)
I wake suddenly with a gasp, nearly falling from my seat as the smooth black top road turns into the crunchy vibrations of a graveled roadway. I blink several times, clearing my eyes enough to see the sign, ‘Welcome to White Ridge, A Gated Community’.
“Wait,” I suddenly gasp in a panic. “We’re supposed to be going to the Black Moon pack.”
“Easy there, Cole. Everything is okay.” Jamie’s voice is calm but assertive as he tries to break through my increasing panic.
“No it’s not okay. We’re not supposed to be here.” I try to convince him.
“No Cole. Delta Ashman explained that the council changed the arrangements. Members of our pack are here so your father asked that they pick us up and the council agreed.”
“That means he’s not going to pick us up until the rest get sent home. He won’t pick up just two wolves.”
I’m really starting to panic as the Ativan has worn off and I fully realize what is happening.
“This was discussed before you left Crimson Dawn. The only details I was given was to transport you to our pack.”
The delta in the front seat of the van comments. I quiet my comments as my unease with the situation grows. I remember the conversation between alpha and this delta from a different pack than what was planned and I’m struggling to place my sudden unease about the situation.
While I was fine with the arrangements on Alpha Black’s territory now that I’m here my instincts are screaming that everything is wrong about this transfer. Delta Ashman slowly comes to a stop in front of a large apartment complex consisting of three buildings, each four stories high but the lack of outdoor lighting and the darkness of night completely swallows all details of the territory. Delta exits the van quickly, opening the back before making his way over to the passenger doors. He throws them open in a display of aggressiveness much harsher than what he had shown while on Alpha Black’s territory causing me even more unease. Jamie wraps his arms around me as the classic wheeze of an asthma attack starts and I know I’m going to be in for a bad ride with it being panic induced.
“I trust the ride here was uneventful?”
Another voice speaks just outside the door.
“There was a little delay in getting started but once in the van they seemed to settle nicely. With the one’s reaction to being here there might be some difficulties getting them out of the van.”
“Why do you think that?”
The new voice has become gruff and impatient.
“Come on boys, I don’t have all night.” He yells impatiently making it that much harder for me to move.
“I’ve never seen so much stuff packed for two men.”
He growls as he starts pulling our things from the back and tossing them onto the pavement in front of the apartment building.
“Get out!” He yells as he passes by the door.
I can’t hold back and yelp in response to his growing impatience.
“Come on Cole, we need to get out.”
Jamie states firmly with a hint of nervousness.
“What’s going on with them?” The second voice speaks again.
“The one that has anxiety issues is claiming they shouldn’t be here. The situation was explained to them before they got in.”
“Were they told that they were last minute additions to the run?”
“No Alpha Whiteman, that information was not given to me.”
Even though his response towards his alpha is calmer it’s the last piece for my already crumbling mind.
“No!” I can’t help but choke on my shout as everything starts getting worse.
I fight Jamie’s hold on me as my mind starts swimming with negativity. I have never been out of the territory longer than six months and there’s no telling how long I’ll be away if what I heard from Alpha Whiteman is correct.
“Let me handle this alpha. We both know that you don’t deal with health issues easily.”
A much kinder voice breaks through the massive haze I’ve gone into.
“You’re right about that. I’m turning in for the night. I’ll call Alpha Redmen in the morning to get some clarity on the situation.”
“They seem close. Do we have any two bed apartments left?”
“Yes Beta Greene, 12B on the first floor is available.”
A female’s voice becomes apparent.
“Start taking their stuff to the apartment. It sounds like one of them is having an asthma attack. When I get them out of the van, I need you to show the one that’s doing okay to the room while I have the other checked by the doctor.”
“Yes sir.” She speaks as I hear a set of footsteps approaching the door.
I’m shocked but don’t move from Jamie’s hold as I feel someone climb into the van, sitting in the seat behind us.
“The two of you seem quite close but you’re a little young to be on your second chance mate.”
“We’re not fated mates, sir.” Jamie starts to explain quietly. “I am his fated beta.”
“That explains a lot more than my assumption. I need the two of you to exit the van and I need the young alpha here, to follow me to the clinic. We need to get this asthma attack under control before we meet with the council. This level of fear over being in the wrong place isn’t normal.”
“No!” I choke on my yell as my lungs constrict even more. “No…. council…. Tests…. painful…. Just…. need…. neb…. neb….”
I’m panting hard as I spiral, there is something about being here that just isn’t right.
“Slow down Alpha Redmen, I’m struggling to understand you.”
“He fears the council getting involved. They only make things worse when he gets home. All he wants is a nebulizer treatment and to return to Crimson Dawn. He’s afraid that his father has lied to Alpha Whiteman as a means of abandoning us here until the rest of the pack is sent home.”
“I’m sorry to hear that you haven’t had the experience with the council that you should. I can honor your request not to involve them and most definitely get you to the clinic for a nebulizer treatment but returning you to Crimson Dawn may be difficult to do. What’s your name, beta?”
“I’m Jamison Williams but everyone calls me Jamie.”
“Okay Beta Jamie, can you help get your alpha friend out of the van?”
“Does everyone get called by their rank? Cole really hates being an alpha.” Jamie states sadly.
“Yes. Alpha Whiteman is a very formal alpha and expects the same from everyone else. The only choices visitors have are being called by either their first or last name. It’s important to get moving before Delta Ashman has an aneurysm. Now that he’s finished unloading the van he’ll be looking to move it to the garage.”
“Yes sir.”
Jamie confirms the command while all I can do is nod before putting all my effort into letting Jamie go. It takes everything I have to move my body across the seat, towards the door. I fall backwards in the door of the van, sitting on the floor as I wheeze heavily.
“It was during his return that things became more active in his case. Alpha Demetri made the trip with his mate to the Shadowlands pack. Turns out she’s an empath and was very sick with silver poisoning. They were able to save her and to the best of my knowledge he returned to Crimson Dawn around the beginning of the year.”“He did it? He made it home?”His face lights up like a child on Christmas day.“Yes, he is with his mate in the protections of Alpha Demetri Black. Unfortunately, his amnesia has not yet resolved and as a precaution, in order to obtain custody of Cole, Alpha Black had to agree to restrict his movements until his mental health improves.”“He’s a prisoner there?”I had a feeling he would take this part hard.“Not necessarily. Considering what little I know about the hell he lived through next door and his encounter with the alpha of Purple Mountain, I don’t see where he’ll have the desire to leave that territory any time soon.”He nods his head a little more relaxed
(Julius’s POV) I smile as the tall frame of my son in law stops and knocks on my open door. “You wanted to see me?” “Yes sir. Please come in.” He steps inside the room but only manages to close the door halfway before the demons of his past creep back upon him. “I would prefer this to be a private conversation but if closing the door makes it feel like you’re going to be punished then I encourage you to keep it open.” I speak my true feelings as he slowly turns around. The look of disbelief on his face. While it takes him several deep breaths he does manage to shut the door by the time I’ve stood from my desk. “Where would you like to sit?” Once again he’s in disbelief. “I need you as relaxed and level headed as possible. Where would you be the most comfortable?” I try again. “The recliner?” He manages to speak after a hard swallow. I nod and allow him to lead. He chooses the rocking recliner allowing him to rock subtlety as Hayden stirs gently. I smile as he console
“I threw a fit. Charles waited until I was outside the courtroom to start punishing me for embarrassing him. He punched me in the face several times before I fell to the ground, then he started kicking me. He kept me on the ground until he was certain Heather and Marcus had left. Even though I had driven my own car to court he dragged me to his. He drove me home, only he didn’t go to the garage. No, he went to the back of the west wing where the room he modified for Cole is. I’ve only been in that room a handful of times when participating in my brother’s torture.” I stop as the memories of wrapping the silver belt around his leg and the condition he was in when I rescued him eight months ago blend together in a confusing mess. Murmurs float around the room, commenting on my unprompted confession. “Breathe, Andre. That was a very difficult truth to admit to. No comments will be made.” I know he’s addressing the pack as I continue to struggle. “You knew what was going to happen to
“I’m concerned about you Andre.” Julius now has my attention only he has crouched down to my level. “While your statement seems to have helped Hayden it gave me the clue I was looking for.” “A clue to what?” “The true reason behind the terror you have in gaining custody of your kids. While any other wolf in this pack saying such a thing would be passed off as simply being very serious about their statement, you stating that you nearly died once to fight for them is something I take very seriously. What happened the last time they were taken from you?” I shake my head hard, holding my breath as I fight against the flashbacks trying to invade my thoughts. “Andre?” He tries again but all I can do is shake my head slowly. “Papa Redmen hit him. He made him bleed.” The innocent voice of my daughter breaks through. “You saw it?” Abe seems shocked that it would be done in front of her. I watch as she nods her head. “Mommy spanked me for crying.” She whines hard before laying against h
(Andre’s POV) Stepping into the pack house is surreal at best. My head is spinning out of control with thoughts I had desperately tried to put behind me. I had relinquished all hope of ever having my kids just for the full force of the unpredictably of my life to cripple me when I need to be my strongest. The house is silent as I pick my way through the crowd. Julius is carrying Harper and Abe is trailing behind the two of us. It seems Julius wants as much of a barrier as he can create between Hayden and any escape route he may manage to find. I’m more concerned about him getting lost inside the pack house than him getting outside it. This place has proven to be a maze to me despite living here full time for the last six months. The house is completely silent except for the television quietly counting down the seconds until the new year. I can only hope that this year is different. That the New Year will actually be the change I’ve needed for years. Shamefully, I feel the dread tha
“To show him the effects that abuse has on others. To prove to him once and for all that what his father taught him is wrong. Besides, Charles has been extremely cruel to Andre as well.” “How so?” “Well, I just learned tonight that Alpha Redmen gave each of his sons permission to have sex, to even rape, at the age of sixteen but lied about the penalty for getting the lady pregnant. Andre has been beaten multiple times for pregnancies. The first two were not his, yet he was mercilessly beaten three times during both of those pregnancies. He was forgiven a fourth when the pups came back not his. The beatings got worse when he got three others pregnant just to be denied the ability to be their father. The two older ones with two different ladies are in better packs than Red Fang but the two with him now. Well, their mother isn’t much of a mother.” I state sadly as I pull into the garage, turning off the motor as the door closes behind me. “I need your help. These pups are terrified a
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