LOGIN“I swear you’d hang photographs of us on the floors if you could.” Izzy sighs, a cup of espresso in his hand, shaking his head at me as he passes.“I’m actually looking into that, not hanging them obviously, like a rug with our faces.”He gives me a dead pan look, the kind he gives whenever he thinks I’m being too cheesy, too sappy, but I think he likes it secretly. “A rug with our faces on it, you’d step on it.”I blanch, shaking my head firmly.“I would never besmirch your face like that.”He chuckles at my use of the word, I’d heard it from his mother one time and I haven’t stopped using it since then. She uses the strangest terms for the simplest things. “We have guests now. If you won’t others will.”I groan. My plan to put all our second wedding photos everywhere around the house is foiling fast. He points to the living room walls, where with the help of Serene, the pictures are on display, in all of them, Izzy looks the best. That’s why I had to hang them up, he’s stunning.
“So you are crazy then.” Courtney says during the emergency meeting I called with Serene and herself.Freddy also helped, he’s called Izzy out for a few hours, ‘brother bonding time’ he called it, Izzy was not so convinced, but Courtney was there to tell him that maybe his brothers wanted to make it up to him, and he couldn’t say no. We have only a few hours to ourselves to plan this.“What part of my plan to propose to my husband makes me sound crazy?” I blink at her, she gives me a pointed look. Serene gives one of her peaceful laughs.“We’re not really married.”“There was a wedding and everything, vows were said, rings exchanged, I was there.”I narrow my eyes at her, her dry humor is the same level as my husband’s it’s like talking to him but in a different voice and face, and this one doesn’t excite me as much as it annoys me. “He said ‘for a few years’ under his breath when they declared us husbands, that’s bad luck, that’s bad omen. I’m trying to change that.”She exhales
I don’t want Izzy to see me so wasted, so I head to the room I used to stay before him. It wasn’t my plan to get so fucking wasted. But the gaping in my chest needed to be filled somehow, every burn of the liquid felt like a great way to fill it up. There’s no way to mourn what never existed in the first place, still, I try, for the life that could have been.Maybe it’s a good thing.No child deserves Mackayla as a mother. Maybe I should look at it from this perspective.With a groan, I push the door open, hovering by the door, my eyes finding the sofa I’d slept on while waiting for a text or a call about finding them. Or even a response to my email. I drag a hand down my face, a shaky breath escaping my lungs.The image is immediately replaced with Izzy’s sleeping form, right here, on this sofa. Where I watched him sleep. My heart swells with emotion.If he didn’t come up to me with such a bold offer, I’d have been back home, losing my mind over a child that never existed in the f
I’m looking into the eyes of my biggest fear and greatest regret. There’s no surge of anything. I’m not overcome with the urge to cover her in kisses, there’s nothing that forces me to move to her. Like it is with Izzy.It was never like that with her, even the beginning stage of our relationship. At the time I was really convinced I loved her. Now I have to question it. When laid side by side with what I feel for Izzy… there’s no comparison to be made. Even so, I wait for the surge of anger. There’s none of that. Turns out I’ve been angry at her this whole time. I’ve come close to hating her. Now she scoffs at me.“You’ve really embedded yourself in a billionaire family, I wonder what that’s like.”I don’t answer. My gaze doesn’t waver.Before Izzy, I stood under the shower, thinking about what I’d say to her if I ever saw her face to face, one time when I felt so angry I was sure I’d wring her neck. I threw up immediately after, disgusted by my own thoughts. Right now, in the
My favorite part of the day is when I climb into bed first, stare at Izzy in his white pyjamas, make sure the bed is comfortable for him, pull the comforters out, and pat the bed. “Come, Izzy.”And watch him melt into my arms.My heart would feel too big for my chest and feel like I’m going to spit it right out. But I manage every night, somehow. At first, Izzy would pretend to search for something, only finding it after I’ve climbed in first and called out to him.I never pointed it out, I just waited patiently, and he started waiting around for me to finish whatever I was doing, and then wait until I called to him before he’d climb in, no more pretenses.When he stopped pretending, he’d hang around me, obviously waiting for me but not saying it, instead he’d ask questions about what I was doing, go through my list of opponents, most times he gives approval for who he wants me to fight with. And whoever he says no to, I don’t bother going through their profile.Izzy’s word is final
Izzy is all I can think, all I can breathe. I can’t help it. My feelings for him keeps growing. And I know I should manage it, especially since his stance about the notion has been clear since day one. He’s a firm non believer. But I can’t help myself, sometimes I’d stare at him and wonder what it would be like to have all of him, for us to be real. My hands stroke the insides of his thigh now, begging me to let him come. I enjoy his thrashing a little longer before pushing into him, barely five strokes in, my husband topples over the edge, gripping my arms with force enough to snap my bone. I jack him off as the last of his orgasm washes over him. “You’re getting even more creative with your wicked ways.” he breathes, pulling himself off me. I pull him back to my lap, like always, I have to do this or he’d slinker away. The sex is mind blowing, there’s no amount of money, fame, wealth, anything else I’d trade it for.But what comes after, the skin to skin, this…I live for it no







