After being locked away her entire life for her protection, Esme is finally let loose on the world. Being half vampire half human in a new world of mean girls and social expectations leaves her unprepared. Luckily for her, she had a guardian ready and waiting to help her through the challenges. Will finding out the identity of her guardian turn out to be her greatest difficulty of all?
Lihat lebih banyakI dreamt about him again last night. There was nothing visual, but I could feel his presence. I could always tell when he was near. I just wished I knew who he was. Even as I woke, it felt like he was still laying there beside me. His body was much hotter than my own and made it feel like I was asleep against a radiator. If he had been any hotter, he would have burned me.
I had no idea how I could have such a connection with someone, but not even know anything about him. I wondered if he knew who I was. If he lurked in the shadows while I slept. I knew he was close, and it made no sense. We lived in a beautiful cabin, but it was high up in the hills of the highlands. There were no neighbours for miles around, and there were rarely any visitors to the area.
It was just how my father liked it. He believed we were more protected, hidden out there. After his vast years roaming the earth, my mother and I had no real knowledge of if it was really necessary. I knew we needed to stay hidden, but we could hide our true selves anywhere. For me, there was barely anything to even hide.
Half human, half vampire, I didn’t have the same skills they had. I wasn’t as strong, or as indestructible. I was immortal, but I still bled just like any other human. That was one reason that my father hauled us up in the highlands. I was a liability. He never said it, but we were only there because I was weaker than them.
My parents had no idea what I would even be like in the beginning. They had kept me isolated for just over a hundred years. They wouldn’t allow me to be well, normal, no matter how much I nagged. I couldn’t be a normal human and I couldn’t be a normal vampire. I was in limbo and it was exhausting. The idea of spending eternity in such a place was unthinkable. I would have rather died like a human than lived my kind of half-life.
Then, to top it off, I could sense him. As though he was begging me to break free from my shackles and join him in the big, bad world. It was making the torture even more unbearable.
I had left the house; I did so relatively often, but never far, and I had to stay under the cover of the trees. Being careful to stay away from man, woman or beast. My parents left regularly to hunt, but I didn’t need blood to survive, unlike them. Although human when I was born, my mother had long since been changed by my father. It wasn’t even like she could understand what I was going through. She had been a vampire much longer than she had been a human.
“What are you thinking about, sweetheart? You look so lost in thought.” I looked up as my mum spoke, the concern in her eyes apparent.
I didn’t even think before I blurted it out. “About how ending my existence would be preferable to this miserable life I lead.” She looked taken aback, but I didn’t know why. It wasn’t the first time I had expressed my will for it to be over and done with, and it wouldn’t be the last.
“I wish you wouldn’t say things like that.” My anger was brewing.
“I wish you wouldn’t keep me locked away like the freak I am, but there we go.” I was being too harsh with my tone. It wasn’t as though I didn’t understand the why, but it didn’t make it any easier to live with.
“You are not a freak, you are a miracle. Bridging the gap and being better than either vampire or human.” She spoke as though she believed every word she spoke, but it felt like just something mums say to their children.
“How exactly am I better? We’re only stuck up here because I am so weak compared to you.” My tone had eased, as had my anger, but I still didn’t believe her opinion of the situation.
“You’re wrong. We might be up here to keep you safe, but you are not weaker than your father and I in all ways. In some things, you are so much stronger. You might not have as much strength, but you don’t have our weaknesses either. To not be ruled by blood lust is alone an invaluable asset. I just wish you would see how special you really are.” She looked at me wistfully. I knew the main complaint she had as a vampire was the bloodlust. It was something she lived with, but hated every second of it.
“All mothers say that. It doesn’t make it true.” I stalked off up to my bedroom. Almost as soon as I stepped foot in my room, I felt him. It was as though he knew I was in pain. As though he was drawn to it. I stepped out onto the balcony and felt the whoosh of icy cold air slap me square in the face. At that moment, I would have killed for the kind of internal heat he had.
I wasn’t even as warm as a human, or so my mother told me. Something inside of me told me that he wasn’t human, not with the heat he radiated, and I was sure he was projecting himself into my dreams. Whenever he was around, it was like a warm glow spread over me. I searched the trees looking for any sign of life, but there was nothing there.
I stumbled backwards. The twinge of pain in my temple throbbed, and then I heard it. “Be patient. You will feel the freedom you desire sooner than you think.” Each word was accompanied by the throbbing of blood in my brain. The husky, dark voice was barely a whisper in my mind, but it was there.
“Who are you?” Just like that, the warm glow had left me again, and I ached for it to return, for him to return. I might have had no idea who he was, but I knew he would change everything. Somehow, I knew he would be the key to my freedom.
EsmeI waited until Jackson had left for work before I made my move. He wasn’t far, but it was enough distance for me to be sure I would be undisturbed. Taking a few deep breaths. I wasn’t even sure what it was I wanted to say, but I knew it would be difficult. I had to say his name several times before he responded at all. It proved he wasn’t listening all the time. He didn’t say anything at all. His response was the warmth that spread over me, letting me know he was there. It was as though he didn’t know what he was supposed to say to me anymore.“How are you?” I wasn’t just trying to make conversation. I was actually worried about him. After what Tyler had said, it made me reconsider everything I had thought about the interaction between him and Jackson. I had judged him without even considering it might not have been him causing the drama.“Warmer than I have been for the last couple of months, at least. I stayed close by in case you wanted to talk.
BrodieI slept in longer than usual the next morning. After months of sleeping in the undergrowth, a bed was a welcome relief. It had been a late night. It was the early hours of the morning before we got to the hotel. We had to travel even further because of the time, needing to find one that was open all night. The second I woke up, the need to check in on her arose, but I resisted it. I knew she needed space, and I was intent on giving it to her, even if it hurt.Having a hotel made life easier in so many ways. I got straight to work. I had barely done more than make decisions in months. Gerald was taking care of pretty much everything, but it was about time for me to check in on the pack’s investments. I was grateful to my father. Despite his failures, his decision to invest in the human world was a sound one. There might have been a time when the pack could survive without funds, but those days were over. It didn’t take much to run the pack, and we had ac
EsmeI heard a scuffle. For a minute, Brodie had me convinced that something had changed with him, but it didn’t take long for him to revert to his old ways. I felt bad for getting Jackson wrapped up in it all. He seemed to be forever trying to broker peace between everyone in his life. Brodie had seemed so reasonable, but as soon as my back was turned, he was the same old Brodie. Dealing with his problems with violence. I was grateful when I finally heard the door slam shut. The last thing any of us needed was more trouble.There was so much I needed to go over with Jackson. Even putting Brodie to one side, I was worried about Mikkel. There was already a chance that he had realised something was strange about us. That feeling would only increase as the pups grew. I already knew that they would grow at a much faster rate than human babies and it was bound to raise eyebrows. We needed to move on, and it wouldn’t be the last time. We would need to spend their wh
BrodieAs I left the room, I didn’t really know what to do with myself. Jackson was lurking outside, and I wondered if he had been eavesdropping on what had been said. The way he behaved like he was somehow hers pissed me off. I resented the hell out of him and it wouldn’t be something I would get over quickly. Despite how I felt, I had no choice but to play nice. I wouldn’t put Esme through the stress of the pair of us fighting over her.“She’s asking for you,” I told him as nicely as I could manage.“Well, she never asked for you,” he spat the words at me. There wasn’t even a semblance of respect, let alone love, in the way he spoke.“Leave it alone. I came because she was in danger.” I didn’t expect him to believe me anymore than I expected Esme to believe me, but it was the truth. When I had left the camp, I had planned to drag her back kicking and screaming if I had to. That had changed somewhere along the way. All that time out in the wilde
EsmeBrodie was shifting nervously on his feet. I didn’t think he even expected it to change anything, and he still couldn’t look at me. Part of him was sure it was too late to change anything, and I wasn’t convinced he was wrong. I wanted it to change something, but so much had happened and it wasn’t just me I had to think about. I had to do what was right for the babies and I had to think about Jackson, too.“What about Milly?” I asked, finally ready to put my concerns about the child into words.“What about her?” There was a level of shock and confusion in his eyes that I hadn’t been ready for.“You never bothered to tell me about her. She looks just like you.” I couldn’t understand why he had never bothered to mention her. If he had, I could have accepted her.“I know she does, but the truth is I’ve never had much to do with her. I wouldn’t know where to start and I’ve hardly got an open heart. The truth is, it never occurred to me to
EsmeJackson had insisted on carrying me up to bed as soon as I had calmed down. It was hardly surprising, given the state of the living room. It was fit for nothing but burning. The events were so hazy in my mind. Jackson tried to explain it to me, but it made no sense. I barely remembered anything at all. Only really the feelings. At first I was fading away, the emptiness creeping in with the never ending blackness. Then out of nowhere came a burning rage. It made me crazy, lashing out at everyone.“I was there. He said he would kill you and the triplets. That’s what set you off.” Jackson was hung up on what Brodie had said. It was almost as though he was trying to convince me rather than telling me.“There is no way he meant that.” I might have been angry with Brodie, but there was just no way I would believe he could have those sorts of intentions, no matter he had said in the moment. He just was capable of that.“He was pretty convincing. Yo
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