After being locked away her entire life for her protection, Esme is finally let loose on the world. Being half vampire half human in a new world of mean girls and social expectations leaves her unprepared. Luckily for her, she had a guardian ready and waiting to help her through the challenges. Will finding out the identity of her guardian turn out to be her greatest difficulty of all?
Lihat lebih banyakI dreamt about him again last night. There was nothing visual, but I could feel his presence. I could always tell when he was near. I just wished I knew who he was. Even as I woke, it felt like he was still laying there beside me. His body was much hotter than my own and made it feel like I was asleep against a radiator. If he had been any hotter, he would have burned me.
I had no idea how I could have such a connection with someone, but not even know anything about him. I wondered if he knew who I was. If he lurked in the shadows while I slept. I knew he was close, and it made no sense. We lived in a beautiful cabin, but it was high up in the hills of the highlands. There were no neighbours for miles around, and there were rarely any visitors to the area.
It was just how my father liked it. He believed we were more protected, hidden out there. After his vast years roaming the earth, my mother and I had no real knowledge of if it was really necessary. I knew we needed to stay hidden, but we could hide our true selves anywhere. For me, there was barely anything to even hide.
Half human, half vampire, I didn’t have the same skills they had. I wasn’t as strong, or as indestructible. I was immortal, but I still bled just like any other human. That was one reason that my father hauled us up in the highlands. I was a liability. He never said it, but we were only there because I was weaker than them.
My parents had no idea what I would even be like in the beginning. They had kept me isolated for just over a hundred years. They wouldn’t allow me to be well, normal, no matter how much I nagged. I couldn’t be a normal human and I couldn’t be a normal vampire. I was in limbo and it was exhausting. The idea of spending eternity in such a place was unthinkable. I would have rather died like a human than lived my kind of half-life.
Then, to top it off, I could sense him. As though he was begging me to break free from my shackles and join him in the big, bad world. It was making the torture even more unbearable.
I had left the house; I did so relatively often, but never far, and I had to stay under the cover of the trees. Being careful to stay away from man, woman or beast. My parents left regularly to hunt, but I didn’t need blood to survive, unlike them. Although human when I was born, my mother had long since been changed by my father. It wasn’t even like she could understand what I was going through. She had been a vampire much longer than she had been a human.
“What are you thinking about, sweetheart? You look so lost in thought.” I looked up as my mum spoke, the concern in her eyes apparent.
I didn’t even think before I blurted it out. “About how ending my existence would be preferable to this miserable life I lead.” She looked taken aback, but I didn’t know why. It wasn’t the first time I had expressed my will for it to be over and done with, and it wouldn’t be the last.
“I wish you wouldn’t say things like that.” My anger was brewing.
“I wish you wouldn’t keep me locked away like the freak I am, but there we go.” I was being too harsh with my tone. It wasn’t as though I didn’t understand the why, but it didn’t make it any easier to live with.
“You are not a freak, you are a miracle. Bridging the gap and being better than either vampire or human.” She spoke as though she believed every word she spoke, but it felt like just something mums say to their children.
“How exactly am I better? We’re only stuck up here because I am so weak compared to you.” My tone had eased, as had my anger, but I still didn’t believe her opinion of the situation.
“You’re wrong. We might be up here to keep you safe, but you are not weaker than your father and I in all ways. In some things, you are so much stronger. You might not have as much strength, but you don’t have our weaknesses either. To not be ruled by blood lust is alone an invaluable asset. I just wish you would see how special you really are.” She looked at me wistfully. I knew the main complaint she had as a vampire was the bloodlust. It was something she lived with, but hated every second of it.
“All mothers say that. It doesn’t make it true.” I stalked off up to my bedroom. Almost as soon as I stepped foot in my room, I felt him. It was as though he knew I was in pain. As though he was drawn to it. I stepped out onto the balcony and felt the whoosh of icy cold air slap me square in the face. At that moment, I would have killed for the kind of internal heat he had.
I wasn’t even as warm as a human, or so my mother told me. Something inside of me told me that he wasn’t human, not with the heat he radiated, and I was sure he was projecting himself into my dreams. Whenever he was around, it was like a warm glow spread over me. I searched the trees looking for any sign of life, but there was nothing there.
I stumbled backwards. The twinge of pain in my temple throbbed, and then I heard it. “Be patient. You will feel the freedom you desire sooner than you think.” Each word was accompanied by the throbbing of blood in my brain. The husky, dark voice was barely a whisper in my mind, but it was there.
“Who are you?” Just like that, the warm glow had left me again, and I ached for it to return, for him to return. I might have had no idea who he was, but I knew he would change everything. Somehow, I knew he would be the key to my freedom.
I stopped running when I reached the same clearing where I had found my dad. I just needed a minute to work everything out. I didn’t even know what half of it meant. It felt like Jackson was confessing that he loved me and that he had told Brodie. If that was true, then how had Brodie ended up hiding in the trees outside my house?“I came to kill you. To remove temptation for my brother. Except once I had seen you, felt you, I couldn’t stop coming. It was ages before I realised that we could communicate with each other subliminally. I got to know you more with each visit, and the idea of killing you became an impossibility. There was a connection between us that Jackson never had with you. You were always supposed to be mine, not his. I hate that I hurt him, but I can’t change fate.” I turned around looking for him, but he wasn’t there.“So, how do I know I’m not fated for Jackson? He was the one I was drawn to when I first started uni. I thought he was the one coming
I waited while Jackson stood and I knew Brodie was just as worried as I was. I had my hands up in front of me defensively, but they wouldn’t do me much good against Jackson. I let out a sigh of relief as he shifted and knew it meant that for the time being, at least he didn’t intend to attack us. His eyes were still focused on me. I could feel them burning into me.“What was that?” He asked me nervously.“I can heal, but it burns while it’s working. Sorry. I’m also sorry for hitting you. I just didn’t want you two to kill each other.” I shrugged my shoulders as though it was nothing. The way he was talking to me had changed completely from how he was at the camp.“Thank you for healing me. Most people in your position would have left me to die.” His eyes dropped slightly, growing wide at the same time. He stepped forward and pulled at my top. I was taken aback but Brodie didn’t move towards us. He turned around instead and faced the wall. Jackson’s fingers ran o
I shook Mum off. She was protecting me out of instinct, but it wasn’t needed anymore. I went to Brodie, but stayed slightly behind him. Not because I needed to, but because I knew it was what he would want me to do. Until I knew more, I had to respect what he would want. The two werewolves just stood there, facing each other. I wondered if they were communicating, but it was like a standoff. Neither was overly aggressive, but they were both on edge, waiting for the need to fight if necessary.“Who is it?” The dark charcoal-coated wolf was a stranger to me, but then I had only seen Brodie and Rachelle in wolf form. I looked into his eyes, but it gave me no more clues. His eyes didn’t seem as fiery as Brodie’s, they were softer almost. They were nearly completely grey, just like their fur, but had bright purple flecks dotted throughout their iris. There was a kind of gentleness there and I realised it was Jackson before Brodie even had the chance to tell me.He must have
I just sat there looking down on the situation and just prayed Brodie didn’t arrive too quickly. I knew him well enough to know that once he did, he would find me out, rather than heading towards the house. I looked into my dad’s eyes, but all there was in them was confusion. Not that it was surprising. His daughter had scarpered from him as though he were the enemy. “What are you doing out here?”“I’ve been coming out each morning and looking for any sign of you. I thought you might have been close by for safety. I must admit, I didn’t expect to find you, let alone for you to drop from the sky.” It hurt that I was surprised he cared enough to be out looking for me.“I’m not staying anywhere near here, but I came to talk to Mum.” I didn’t really know what else to say.“She will be relieved to see you.” I might have trusted him more if he had been full of rage and demanded that I go home. Instead, he was completely calm, and I felt like he was trying to lure me i
The next morning, I lay there watching him sleep. It was odd he seemed to need way more sleep than I did. As with everything else, I had no idea if it was me that was strange or him. I usually only slept for five or six hours. At home, I would have been up and about, heading into the woods or reading. Instead, I lay there in a bed that wasn’t my own, knowing the day was going to be a bad one. I made the decision hours ago. I needed to go home. I needed to speak to my mum and Vanessa. I needed information, and it was something he couldn’t give me.It wasn’t like I believed he would stop me from going back. I knew in my heart that he wouldn’t. Regardless, it would cause problems for him. He would be taking a huge risk. Even sneaking me out of the camp again could be a problem, and then he was taking the risk that I wouldn’t come back. I was taking that risk, too. For all I knew, my parents could lock me up in the basement to try to prevent me from returning to him.Even
As soon as I was back in the basement and uncuffed, he left to deal with business. I sat and brooded about the deer I had killed and continued to hate myself for killing Bambi, but at least it wasn’t Brodie. I pulled my laptop out and started it up. Feeling particularly impatient as it took its time turning on and booting up. Heading straight for my emails. I wanted to send something to my mum without my dad being able to interrupt me. Hoping to try to explain at least a little. I spotted the email from Flint but decided to wait until afterwards to open it.Mum,I know you and Dad don’t understand. I didn’t expect you to. I am safe, I promise. I need you to stay away from Cassie’s dad. He’s not the good guy you think he is. I lied before, I am with Pip. I know you don’t trust him, but he has had so many opportunities to harm me and has done nothing but protect me over and over again. I’m still training. I can heal, I healed Pip. I’m pretty
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