Chapter 1

I died.

Finally, I no longer need to suffer the torment of illness, bedridden and desperately waiting for death.

My soul rose up from my body.

I saw how miserably pale my face was.

Before I could process that thought, my soul was led out of my hospital room, appearing next to my younger brother, Sean Child.

His kidney transplant was a success and he could be discharged from the hospital. He was lying in bed, looking healthy, his face plump and red.

Our mother was still worried about him. She sat next to him on the bed, caressing his face dotingly.

"You suffered so much, Sean. Look at how thin you are. My heart hurts so badly."

Sean shook his head gently. "Mommy, I'm fine. See, I'm alright."

Mommy's eyes reddened and tears streamed down her face. She nodded in agreement and said, "Yes, you're my lucky star, Sean. You had just been diagnosed when we found you two kidney donors."

She smiled proudly at the mention of the kidney donors.

When I was sick, we could not find a match. I had no choice but to go through dialysis to keep the sickness at bay.

My parents were divorced. Mommy raised the two of us on her own.

It was not easy. She did not have the energy to take care of me.

I did not blame her as I understood.

Later on, Sean got sick as well. When she first found out about his illness, she rushed over to me in the hospital, looking at me maliciously.

"It's all because of you. You made your brother sick as well."

She hit me with all her might until the medical staff pulled her away. She loathed me, convinced that Sean got sick because of me.

Even if the doctor had explained to her that our illness was genetic, she refused to believe it.

Once Sean got sick, Mommy went all around the hospital asking for help.

Luckily, Sean and I finally found two matching kidney donors.

…

My thoughts were pulled back by Sean's laughter. He chuckled happily, showing his dimple.

Then, as if suddenly thinking of something, he asked softly, "I wonder how Ivan is doing."

When Mommy heard my name, her gaze darkened a little.

She said, "Why are you bringing up your brother? He can take it. He's done dialysis so many times. I'm sure he'll make it."

Her tone got icy when she talked about me. She casually brushed off the pain and suffering I had been through.

I clenched my trembling fingers.

That was not the case.

'Mommy, oh, Mommy,' I thought.

'The countless times I was in so much pain from the dialysis that I was drenched in cold sweat. The countless tears.

'It was not that it wasn't painful. I just didn't want you to worry, so every single time, I gritted my teeth and told myself to be strong, but you didn't seem to care about my suffering at all.

All you cared for was Sean'

Mommy placed a bowl of chicken soup on the table and fed Sean spoon by spoon.

"Sean, you're weak. Of course, you need two kidneys to be healthy."

That was the second time I heard such a thing from her.

When we found two matching donors, I had once lay in bed thinking about what Sean and I would do once we were completely recovered, yet Mommy would not allow me to recover.

She had given both kidneys to Sean without any hesitation.

I lay in bed, tormented by the illness, as she held my hand. She said, "Sean has been weak since he was young. He needs two kidneys to be healthy. He's not like you. You've been through so many rounds of dialysis I'm sure you're used to it."

At that, I could not help but laugh, yet my tears fell uncontrollably.

Yes, I had been through so many rounds of dialysis.

I had gotten used to it.

Mommy was still talking to Sean gently and dotingly, "Sean, you're the best boy in the world. Now, drink some soup. You need the nutrients."

She fed Sean spoon by spoon, without the slightest trace of impatience.