CHAPTER SIX

The Man Who Came Back

By the time May 1 arrived, I had almost convinced myself that Vince no longer mattered.

Almost.

I had spent the past few months trying to put the pieces of my life back together.

December had broken something inside me.

January had been about surviving.

February passed without me really noticing.

March brought Liam into my life.

April brought James.

And somewhere between all of it, I had started learning how to live without waiting for Vince to come back.

Then he called.

He wanted to see me.

It was May 1, a public holiday, and he knew I would finish work early.

He didn't explain much.

He simply asked me to meet him at our usual place.

I agreed.

I don't know why.

Maybe because even after everything, some part of me still wanted answers.

Maybe I wanted to see whether being around him would still make me feel the way it used to.

Or maybe I just wanted to understand how someone could promise you forever and then marry somebody else.

After work, I went home, changed and got ready.

When I arrived at our usual place, Vince was already there.

For a moment, seeing him made everything feel strangely familiar.

It was almost as if the past few months hadn't happened.

Almost.

"Hi," he said.

"Hi."

We looked at each other.

There were so many things I wanted to say.

Instead, I asked, "Why did you want to see me?"

He told me he was back.

Back from his hometown.

Back from the place where he had married another woman.

But there was something about the way he spoke that made it seem ordinary.

As though coming back was simply the next thing he had been supposed to do.

I asked him why he hadn't told me.

He didn't have a proper answer.

"I didn't know how to tell you."

I almost laughed.

"You knew how to tell me you were getting married."

He looked down.

I didn't push him.

We had already said enough.

The evening continued.

Eventually, night came.

And somehow, we stayed together.

The strange thing was that I wasn't even surprised by what happened next.

Vince took out his phone.

He opened his game.

And he started playing.

I sat beside him.

At first, I didn't say anything.

I watched him.

His eyes were fixed on the screen, his fingers moving quickly as he played.

Every now and then, he would make a frustrated sound when something happened in the game.

I looked at him and almost smiled.

This was familiar.

Too familiar.

I had seen this before.

So many times.

Whenever I visited him at work, I had felt it.

Whenever we spent time together, I had felt it.

Even when we were sitting next to each other, it sometimes felt like I was alone.

His phone always had his attention.

His game always had his attention.

Everything seemed to have his attention except me.

I remember sitting there thinking about how strange marriage could be.

You could have a husband sitting right beside you and still feel completely alone.

I looked around the room.

Vince was beside me.

But somehow, he felt miles away.

"Are you going to play that the whole night?" I finally asked.

He didn't look up.

"Just one more."

I knew what that meant.

One more game became another.

Then another.

I sighed and looked away.

I didn't argue.

I had learned long ago that arguing wouldn't make him put the phone down.

Instead, I sat quietly.

And as I watched him play, memories started coming back.

All those weekends when I had visited him.

All those times I had wanted us to talk.

All those moments when I had hoped he would put his phone away and simply look at me.

I had always blamed myself.

Maybe I was too needy.

Maybe I wanted too much attention.

Maybe I was expecting too much from marriage.

But sitting there that night, I finally understood something.

I wasn't asking for too much.

I had simply been asking the wrong person.

The worst part was that I wasn't lonely because Vince wasn't there.

I was lonely because he was there and still made me feel like I wasn't important.

I looked at him again.

He didn't notice the tears gathering in my eyes.

He was still playing.

And suddenly, the memory of his wedding-day smile came back to me.

The happy man on that video call.

The man who had looked so completely at peace while my world was falling apart.

I wiped my eyes before he could notice.

Maybe this was why I had started talking to Liam.

Maybe this was why James's company felt so comforting.

It wasn't simply about another man.

It was about how lonely I had been for a long time.

I had been married.

But I had been lonely.

I had been someone's wife.

But I hadn't felt like someone's choice.

And now, sitting beside Vince in the middle of the night while he played his game, I realized that nothing had changed.

Not even after everything.

I was still sitting beside my husband...

and feeling completely alone.

That night, I finally understood that my marriage hadn't broken on the day Vince married someone else.

It had been breaking slowly for years.

I had just been too afraid to admit it.

And perhaps that was why leaving him would hurt so much.

I wasn't only leaving Vince.

I was leaving the woman I had spent two years trying to become for him.