All Chapters of Wretched Self: Chapter 41 - Chapter 50

I could feel my nervousness and my heart were beating so fast. I did not know what would happen this night. I just wish that this will be over as soon as I can bear because I might collapse here, in front of Mister Adonis and madame Lucia. Damn it.When Jinx asked me about the dinner, I have no choice but to face them. I had to respect them because they were the parents of Jinx. I should and must respect them. They were a parent and they did not deserve to be escaped from.I stopped my hands from shaking and pretended that I was okay here.I will be fine."So, would you tell me if you really love my son?" Madame Lucia asked while raising her brows. I gulped. Jinx was about to say something when I stopped him.I want him to stop from defending me. I will be better. I want to face a challenges alone, because he will not be always here beside me for a support. No one would stay forever."Astra," Jinx warned me but I just smiled at him. I then t

"Babe, happy first month of being together!"I was so excited for this day because it was our first month together. We have been together in 31 days. It was not easy because we argue but we were able to fix it as soon as possible. We didn't want anything happen for worse."Happy anniversary," he greeted while we were both tearing up. We both laughed at ourselves and just hugged each other.I buried my face on his chest when he kissed the top of my head. I want to kiss him but I am too young to do that. I only have the guts to kiss his face, not including his lips. I mean, yes, I could, maybe, when I turn 18.I want to laugh at myself. I am too babying myself.I will just wait for me to have another year."I want to kiss you right now," he chuckled and kissed my temple this time. My face heated as he faced me and cupped my face."Why not?"He stared at my eyes and shook his head. "You're still a baby."I laughed and just

I still could not get what happened.As far as I have known, Madame Lucia hates me. She does not like me for her son. She does not like the way I wear outfits, and she see me as a trash. But then, now was different. The way she looks at me, it has something to do with my euphoria.I smiled in my inner me. I want to scream, I want to hug her, I want to tell nor show to her how happy I am. But maybe, she does not like me do such a thing. I think I am still a disgusting woman she first saw.I could not tell it by just her eyes!I know, eyes cannot lie, but I did not want to give myself false hope because I will just be the one who would be hurt.I should know my place.We went to the backyard of their mansion. I was a bit shy because Jinx did this for me. This is their house and funny how I celebrate my birthday here. It was theirs and it felt very awkward!"Hey, calm down, please?" Jinx looked at me, worries written all over his face.

Why would jinx always sticks to me? Bad luck never leave my life. Even if I do everything just to receive good things, it still couldn't. I am slowly losing hopes, really. I always wish that maybe, tomorrow will be a good day, that the sun rises with good things ahead. But... I am nothing but a glue of bad things. And yes, jinx' stays with me but why... Why do my love named Jinx can't? I did all my best to love him. To be a good woman, person. Things really turns out opposite with what you have plan. Expecting is not a good behaviour for every person. Because in the end of the day, it will just hurt you. You will be ending up with pain, agony that is like death that you never want. I always keep asking myself. Do I deserve this? Everytime, I remind myself that everything happens for a reason. That things that was active, good nor bad, is something that will g

JINX'S POV"Please, marry your fiancee. Stop loving me... Your feelings towards me is just... is just useless..."That remarks from the woman I love is like a pointed knife keeps on tugging my chest through my heart. It hurts a lot. It was like breaking me. It was like I am slowly falling down and the time I touch the floor, I will be nothing but a debris alone.I should have told her the truth before I confess my feelings towards her so it wouldn't be so much hard like the current. I should have told her that I have a fiancee and I am willing to cancel the marriage for her. I should have told her before she get hurt. But fuck this Cowardliness.I was about to... but I thought that she might push me away and hate me.It was all my fault..."Jinx, do your job correctly," said mom. But I was too preoccupied with my thoughts that I didn't bother to look at her. "It's over! Don't be too much driven by that Astra! You have Jane, okay? She is bett