Semua Bab Endless Soul: Bab 21 - Bab 30

“Oh? Bakit ang aga mo yatang umuwi ngayon?” Takang tanong ni Mama sa akin nang makapasok ako sa loob ng bahay. Nasa living area siya kasama si Papa na nanunuod ng balita.See?! Masyadong maaga pa talaga ‘yong 7pm na uwi ko. Ayaw lang maniwala ni Lexus. Usually kasi 10 pm talaga ang uwi ko rito sa bahay kapag nakakauwi ako dahil sinusulit ko ang mga araw ng pananatili ko rito sa Iloilo.“Ah…napaaga ng hang-out ma. Pasok lang ako ng kwarto.” Sabi ko at diretsong pumasok sa kwarto ko at saka humilata. Kinuha ko ang cellphone ko sa bag ko para itext si Lexus.‘I’m home.” I texted him. Sabi kasi niya ay etext ko siya kapag nakauwi na ako sa bahay.‘Good. Kumain ka na rin.’ He texted back.‘Busog pa ako sa kinain natin kanina kaya baka hindi na ako mag-dinner.’‘Yeah right. Same, baka ‘di na rin ako.’‘Safe trip bukas! Hope you enjoyed your little stay here!’ – sabi ko sa text. Nag-cr muna ako saglit dahil ihing-ihi na ako. Lumabas din ako ng kwarto pagkatapos dahil tinawag ako nina mama at

Hindi ko akalaing pagkatapos ng small break namin sa law school ay babalik ako ng Manila na may boyfriend na, parang ang real-quick lang isipin. But gaya nga ng sabi ko, bakit ko pa patatagalin eh nararamdaman ko rin naman?Since maganda nga ang mood ko the moment na bumalik ako ng Manila, wala na akong ginawa sa buhay kundi ang magbasa ng magbasa. Noon medyo nagbibigay pa ako ng allowance sa sarili ng medyo mahabang break-time to do some stuffs or just do nothing, ngayon ay sobrang konti na lang dahil mas naging masipag pa ako lately.Ito ba ang nagagawa ng may jowa sa law school?“Ramirez,” our professor called me. On-deck ako for recitation kaya hindi talaga malabo na hindi ako matawag. Prepared naman ako kaya keri lang.“In the case of Demara v. Court of Appeals, was a crime committed?”“Yes, there was a crime committed. The Supreme Court ruled that when factual impossibility occurs because extraneous circumstances unknown to the actor or beyond his control, rendered the intended

“Ga,” I called him while removing my glasses.“Hmm?” he hummed and at the same time he raised both of his eyebrows. Both of his palms were placed in his jaw and his elbow was leaning on the table where I was reviewing. Nagdecide na lang ako na magreview ng kaunti kahit hapon pa ang klase ko.Well, it’s just that mahirap magpakawala agad when you know na unpredictable ng scenario palagi sa law school.I hissed.“Can you like not…” I pause, because I felt awkward. “Stare at me like that?” sabi ko. Hindi naman kasi ako sanay na may tumititig sa akin ng ganoon. I mean, my gosh baka kasi parang unggoy ako or may dumi sa mukha ko kaya ganoon?“Like what?” sabi niya. Napabuntonghininga na lamang ako habang nakatitig sa kanya at naka-crossed arms. I turned my head towards him.“Gaya ng ginagawa mo ngayon, tigilan mo iyan,” Then I look away, tapos kinuha ko iyong notes ko at doon na lang tumingin.“Can’t I stare at something beautiful?”His words almost make me choke. Sigurado akong maibubuhos

Apologies after apologies. It was as if a cycle already. But you know why we forgive easily and accept apologies all over again? It’s because of the reason that we are in love. We forgive because we love that certain person, we love our family and friends that’s why.Lexus however, I know that he’s lacking on some aspects but that was also the reason why, we stayed because we loved everything about a certain person, flaws and stuffs are counted too and everything that’s not beautiful in that person became beautiful because we love them wholly.One of his exes suddenly showed-up in the middle of nowhere. The kind of ex that’s obsessive and too hard to handle. Eris is her name, daughter of a congressman. She keeps on showing in everything. Kahit na normal na lakad lang namin ni Lexus o kahit na hindi naman planado ay lagi ko siyang nakikitang pakalat-kalat kung saan.I’m not whining or ranting about his ex and stuffs before he met me because that wall in the past. Ang sa akin lang, para

Napagtanto ko na mahirap pala talaga pasukin ang mundo ng pag-ibig, hindi siya basta-basta lang na kapag gusto niyo ang isa’t isa ay okay na. It isn’t like that, because having a relationship with someone is accompanied by pain and problems.“Almost three weeks na sunod nang sunod si Lexus sayo, hindi mo ba kakausapin?” nag-aalalang tanong ni Cha sa akin. Si Kaila naman ay nakatanaw lang sa akin but I know she had a lot of questions.“Hindi niya naman deserve kausapin. And why would I talk to a cheater?”“Okay. Just know that we are here okay?” Dagdag pa niya. Ngumiti lang ko bilang tugon. Then after some time Kaila speak-up.“Communicate with him sis. I know it’s hard but that’s should be the first option, and real talk lang, you being like this like running away isn’t helping you. Kung nasaktan ka, iiyak mo, magalit ka and all, resent him, but hear his side first no matter what. Don’t pretend like it’s okay.”She’s right. Communicate and don’t run away like scaredy-cat.I run away.