Tous les chapitres de : Chapitre 41 - Chapitre 50

I was tired. Hell, I was exhausted. And sore. And emotionally raw. I didn’t have it in me to keep discussing everything that had happened. I didn’t think I could question my entire life any more than I already was.Twenty-four hours.That’s all it took for what little I had to fall apart. Less than that really. Last night I had started to let myself believe things could work here. Then I met Lucas’ family. I watched the way his aunt and uncle were together. I saw the love and devotion there was between them, which is saying something since Rodney Danvers didn’t strike me as a particularly emotive individual. But more than that, I saw how kind and open and patient they were. They were good people. I couldn’t imagine someone with a cruel heart being raised by those two individuals in that environment.I still didn’t want to believe that. But I really needed to stop considering what I wanted to believe. I needed to start facing reality and making decisions based on what I knew was true.

Things were still tense between Sutton and me the next day. It was upsetting that she tried to leave, and there was no denying that the incident with Daisy played a role in that. It would have been one thing if Sutton was angry about an affair that never happened, but it was clear that she was using it as an excuse to doubt herself. Then to sneak off in the middle of the night…That wasn’t who Sutton was. That much I knew for sure. Just as well as I knew she wanted me. Sutton wanted to be with me. That’s why she was so hurt by Daisy’s confrontation. Sutton just needed to admit it to herself.I went to the sunroom in the afternoon. Sutton was standing in the backyard, her back to the house. She’d spent most of the day out there. I hadn’t planned on giving her space today. Neither had Rhonen. After our run last night, he was ready to claim Sutton completely. The fact that he was beginning to sense her wolf didn’t stem that eagerness. It was possible he would sense her more than Sutton d

It had been a strange day. I had thrown myself into my work in the garden. I admit that I was hoping for a distraction after my failed attempt to leave, but it ended up giving me time to think. My mind kept going back to Lucas’ comment about my life — about the life I deserved. I couldn’t remember a time I considered what I deserved from life. Two weeks ago, I didn’t even know what I wanted, let alone what I deserved.I started to analyze my behavior. First, from the night before, then over the past few weeks, then over the time with Mason until it escalated to my entire life. I found myself in tears a few times. I thought about my mother and the memories of her I still had. While I had been questioning so much of my life, including that part of it, I was reminded of one thing that I was always certain of. My mother loved me. For whatever reason she hid our past from me, she believed she had good reason and that it was what was best for me at the time.But that didn’t mean it was rig

I pulled my hand away quickly. Closing my eyes to somehow chase them away. I never wanted to see those images again, especially not with Lucas. That wasn’t him. He didn’t do those things to me.I was suddenly having trouble catching my breath.I felt myself being lifted off the ground. Hands went to my face. Gentle hands. Hands I knew. Hands I trusted.“Sutton, baby, look at me,” Lucas’ voice echoed, trying to break through the haze of memory. “Sutton, open your eyes. Look at me.” I managed to pry my eyes open. Instantly meeting his. “Hey, baby,” he whispered. “It’s just me.”My breathing slowed. I relaxed against his hold. The memories faded away. But his expression was pained. Fear and worry filled his eyes. My heart sank to my stomach. All my doubts came flying back.“That was too much,” he murmured. “I never should have let it go that far.”I shook my head. “No, I wanted to,” I insisted, tears starting to sting. “This isn’t your fault. It’s… it’s my stupid brain. I just… I want to

Sutton started to prepare for the move to the packhouse the next morning. I had finished making a few phone calls when I went upstairs to check on her as she was packing. She was staring at the suitcase sitting on the bed when I walked in.“Everything okay?”She sighed. “Yeah, I’m just done,” she replied with a small laugh. “I don’t really have much and you did say to leave some things here.”“That will change soon enough,” I told her. “You’ll have a full wardrobe in no time once…”“No, no, no,” she interrupted. “That’s not what I meant.” She laughed softly. “I was just thinking again, that’s all.”“About?”Sutton raised an eyebrow at me.“Okay, okay, stupid question,” I laughed, knowing very well how much she had to think about. “Would you like to talk about any of those thoughts you’re having?”Sutton shrugged. “I’m kind of still trying to organize them,” she said. “But focusing on the move has helped. I have things I can actually do about it.”The doorbell sounded unexpectedly.“Ar