My Wife's 33 Runaway Attempts for True Love
After I register my marriage with Gabriella Archer behind everyone's backs, whenever she unlocks a new bedroom position with her childhood sweetheart, Nathaniel Taylor, she tells me that she'll throw a wedding to make it up to me.
In three years, Gabriella has brought the wedding up 33 times. Of course, she has broken her promise 33 times as well.
The first time she did, it was because Nathaniel's dog had died. In order to pay respects to it, Gabriella told me that she couldn't host any auspicious events for three months.
I was still clad in a tux as I kept apologizing and making amends to all of our family, friends, and relatives beneath the stage.
The second time Gabriella flaked out on me, it was thanks to Nathaniel's stomachache. She had the wedding car turned around so that she could buy medicine for Nathaniel and take care of him.
In every wedding after that, Nathaniel would get into all sorts of troubles and ailments.
I fought with Gabriella, and I lost my temper multiple times.
But Gabriella often hit me with, "Nate and I are just friends with benefits. You're my actual husband here, so don't be petty."
After Gabriella breaks her promise for the 33rd time, I'm finally done with her. So, I slide a divorce agreement in her direction.
"The cooling-off period is over, so let's just finalize the divorce."