Birthday Jokes For Dad

This is a story of two close friends (Courtney and Judy) and the odds that meet them as soon as Courtney turns 18. They hope for a bright future together but have no clue on things that are yet to unfold in their lives.

After twenty-five years of trying to win over Gus Harding, I failed and died by his hand. But he didn't know that. He kept threatening, demanding I show myself immediately. The real heiress slapped him hard. "Genevieve is dead, and you didn't even care enough to see her one last time." Gus scoffed, claiming it was just another one of my tricks. Only when he saw my cold, lifeless body did he finally understand. I was gone for good. And this time, it drove him mad.

By our sixth year of marriage, Derrick hadn't touched me in three months. Said he was swamped at work. Always tired. After everything, I still believed him. Then on my birthday, I caught his friend talking in Garmenian—a language Derrick didn't think I understood. "You cut off the side piece yet? You were with her nonstop. Surprised you didn't drop dead. Your wife cool with that?" Derrick let out a smoke ring. "Haven't touched Audrey in months. Sabrina's insane in bed—I'm not over her yet. Sucks she got pregnant. Audrey doesn't want kids, so I gave Sabrina some cash. She'll have the baby overseas." My hands curled into fists. Silent tears streamed down my face. He glanced over, nervous. "What's wrong?" I smiled. "The cake you made is amazing. I'm really touched." It was sweet—but when you understand Garmenian, all you taste is betrayal.

I knew that my father did not like me since I was young. When I wanted to commit suicide to end the pain caused by my illness, he was celebrating another child’s birthday. He hated my mother and me alongside her. So, when I told him that I was sick, he did not believe me. “Is this your new tactic to get money from me?” No one believed that the daughter of the Powell family could die because she was too poor to pay the hospital fees. My father did not believe it either. However, when he saw my dead body, the famous actor who hated his daughter actually went insane.

Pangarap ni Mavie na makatanggap ng birthday cake, buong-buo at walang bawas ang icing. Mahirap ang kanilang pamilya ngunit nagagawa ng kanilang magulang, kapwa magsasaka, ang patapusin sila sa pag-aaral. Matalik na magkaibigan mula pagkabata sina Hugo at Mavie sa kabila ng magkaiba ang estado ng kanilang buhay. Nag-aaral ng political science si Hugo sa bayan at nangangarap magtrabaho sa gobyerno. Samantala, nag-aaral naman ng engineering si Mavie sa kanilang baryo na nangangarap na maipa-renovate ang kanilang kubo. Isang kalihim ng samahang ARC (Arts with Responsibilities Creatives) si Mavie. Sa tulong ng kanyang kaibigang si Salome, namulat siya sa paglilingkod sa kolehiyo. Ang mga dokumento ng samahan na maingat niyang hinahawakan ang magiging susi ng pagmulat ng kanyang mga mata sa totoong takbo ng kolehiyo, maging ang iba pang organisasyong humaharap sa mala-butas ng karayom sa pagre-request ng budget ng mga gaganaping programa para sa mga kapwa estudyante. Samantala, ang pangarap na birthday cake ni Mavie para sa kanyang sarili ang magiging pinto ng kanyang tadhana upang hanapin ng kanyang puso ang lubos na sinisinta. Ito ay sa kabila ng mga kinakaharap ng mga pagsubok sa gitna ng tagumpay.

On my birthday, the dining table was loaded with all my favorites. My mom had been cooking and baking the entire afternoon, insisting everything be perfect for when Mike got home from work so we could celebrate together. But then, he called and said his first love had been drugged at a bar, and he had to go help her. I stopped him and begged him not to go. Mike snapped at me. "Jesus, Em, don’t pull this jealous wife crap. She’s alone, defenseless, and unconscious—I can't let some random dude take advantage of her!" My mother heard those words and was so enraged that she had a heart attack. She died on the spot. Just like that, my mom died on my birthday. I called Mike, asking him to attend my mom's funeral. But before he could reply, I saw Cathy Miller's latest Instagram post, captioned: [Mikey… after all these years, it was always you.] Mike had liked it. My thumb moved before my brain caught up, typing out the only words that mattered: [A homewrecker and a lying bastard. Hope you rot together.]

"I want you... right here... right now." I breathed. His lips hovered over mine, his breath mingling with my own as he spoke. "Once I start, there's no turning back." I swallowed hard and nodded. My gaze dropped to his lips, full and tempting. I watched, craving, as his tongue swept across his bottom lip "How could I possibly want you to stop when my body is aching for your touch?" The words slipped before I could stop them. For a second, I thought he would push me away again, but then something in him snapped. His lips inched closer to mine, and his fingers lightly stroked my cleavage. The touch made my breasts push higher against my dress, my nipples tightening, my chest heaving as my heartbeat raced. It was all getting too intense, and I was tempted to run and pretend this never happened. But the ache between my legs was too strong to ignore. I wasn’t about to let this moment slip away. “Kiss me," I whispered, pressing my body closer to his in a slow, seductive tease. “Make me forget him....” A dark and intense forbidden love story about a good girl gone bad, Clairessa Hartwood thought she had it all—until heartbreak drove her to revenge. After catching her boyfriend, Adrian Storm, cheating, she seduces his powerful father, Gabriel Storm, while withholding the truth about her previous relationship with his son. Gabriel finally gives in, and they begin a passionate affair, even as Adrian tries to win Clairessa back. Clairessa wants more from the relationship, but Gabriel, still haunted by past betrayals, refuses to commit and ultimately breaks things off. Clairessa navigates heartbreak, desire, and love, she finds herself trapped in a dangerous love triangle between father and son.

When Dylan Sullivan took a new type of hallucinogen, I was forced to give myself to him to curb the effects. Innately fertile, I got pregnant, giving birth to fraternal twins—a boy and a girl—after marrying him. However, Dylan refused to let them call him daddy, drinking away the nights while staring at the picture of his one true love. Then, on our tenth anniversary, he locked us up in the basement and burnt us to death. As it turns out, he remained hung up on that moment when I saved him all this time, stubbornly convinced I intervened when he was vulnerable to satisfy my ambitions. That in turn drove a rift between himself and his one true love, whose heartbreak led to psychosis and the accident that killed her. But I somehow opened my eyes to find myself alive, returning to the day Dylan took the hallucinogen by mistake. This time, I let his one true love have him, while I headed towards the study…

THOMPSON AMELIA,A single mom who is trying to live her life in peace and far away from trouble. After being ruined by a mafia gang at 16, vows to take revenge. A very slow and dangerous revenge. What happens when she meets Brown Noah, the CEO of brown company? What happens when she finds out that Brown Noah, the one her heart longs for is the one that ruined her?

After Rory was betrayed by her ex-boyfriend, in a moment of impulse and rebellion, she sought revenge through a one-night stand with a stranger, only to wake up and discover that the man was her best friend Needy's father. Caught in a mix of embarrassment and turmoil, she thought it was a one-night stand…, until he turned out to be her new professor. It was said that Scott never had second sex with the same girl. But he wanted Rory every night. Their forbidden relationship was full of danger and excitement, and then Rory’s mother arrived to set off yet another bomb.... Yearning for My Friend’s Dad is created by Amelie Bergen, an eGlobal Creative Publishing signed author.