Birthday Jokes For Dad

Fay is a psychologist and her patient is the most ruthless mafia king. He's in jail. And he's the father of Fay's ex ?! One day, he caged Fay against bars and unbuttoned her shirt Fay tried to push him away but she was wet. Him："You know, doc. I wanted to do this the first day we met."

On my 16th birthday, I treat myself to the most delicious cake I can find. On that day, before I can even take a bite, my parents, who are always at odds with each other, sign their divorce papers right in front of me. So, on my wedding day, I tell my wife, Keira Jarrett, "If you ever want a divorce, just get me a birthday cake." She hugs me tightly and promises me."Don't worry. 'Birthday' won't even be a word in our home anymore." Seven years later, on Keira's birthday, her assistant, Jackson Price, throws her a surprise party. She slaps him across his handsome, gentle face and kicks him out of Jarrett Group. That day, I am convinced I have chosen the right woman for life. But three months later, on my birthday, I find out the supposedly fired Jackson has been promoted to Keira's personal secretary. He personally delivers a custom-made birthday cake to me. I call Keira to demand an explanation, but her voice on the other end is cold and distant. "Jack meant well. Don't be a spoilsport." I freeze for a moment, then hang up. It turns out my parents are right all along. The only way a birthday cake tastes right is when it's served with divorce papers.

Ito ay isang perpektong plano. Hanggang sa ang pekeng narararamdaman niya ay nagsisimula ng maging totoo... The last thing on Tyler's mind is romance. Sa pagitan ng pagiging isang solong ama at pamamahala sa kanyang matagumpay na karera sa pagsusulat, mayroon siyang higit sa sapat sa kanyang plano. Ngunit nang magpasya ang kanyang ex na labanan siya para sa kustodiya ng kanilang anak, alam niyang kailangan niyang ipakita sa hukom na siya ay isang solidong tao sa pamilya. Ang kakailanganin niya ay isang pekeng kasintahan, Ngunit hindi niya alam kung saan siya makakahanap ng isang babaeng handang magpanggap bilang kanyang asawa sa lalong madaling panahon. Ang pagkumbinsi sa kanya na tumulong ay hindi isang problema. Hindi na niya pinapansin kung paano niya papakinggang ang napakabilis na tibok ng puso niya para rito. Ngayon ito na ay isang problema. Ang gusto lang ni Ellie Diaz ay isang trabaho sa pagtuturo sa prestihiyosong paaralan ng Lincoln Academy, ngunit ang pagkuha sa kanila na isaalang-alang ang kanyang aplikasyon ay isang hamon. Ang magtrabaho dito bilang isang guro ay matagal niya ng minimithi. Pagkatapos ay nalaman niyang may mga koneksyon si Tyler doon—at handa siyang gamitin ang mga ito kapalit ng isang maliit na maliit na pabor. Ang kailangan lang niyang gawin ay mula sa pagiging yaya ng kanyang anak hanggang sa pekeng kasintahan ni Tyler ...at kahit papaano ay magpanggap na hindi siya naaakit sa kanya. Kung magiging maayos ang lahat, mapapatunayan ni Tyler sa hukom na magdedesisyon sa kaso ng kustodiya ng kanyang anak na siya ay isang solidong tao sa isang pamilya, at makukuha naman ni Ellie ang kaniyang tiket sa pangarap niyang trabaho. Ano ang posibleng maging mali? Ano ang gagawin mo kapag ang linya sa pagitan ng reyalidad at pantasya ay lumabo?

On our wedding anniversary, I canceled all my meetings and made a reservation at a restaurant. That evening, my wife, the renowned investigative journalist Amaya Shaw, called me. “Efim, I’m sorry! I just received a tip from a source. It’s urgent. “It involves inside information about a well-known company. I have to go verify it immediately!” But the next day, I saw that Javor Furey, the junior she had brought along, had posted a collage on his social media. The central photo showed Amaya wearing a childish birthday hat. Her head was pressed against Javor’s, as they made a wish together in front of a cake covered in candles. This was the caption. [Thanks, my dear Ms. Shaw! Even in the midst of her busy schedule chasing big stories, she remembered to give me this surprise birthday!] [Chasing big stories.] I stared at those three words. Then, I glanced at the limited-edition bag on our dining table. It was the one she had been raving about for half a year. It was the anniversary gift I had prepared for her. I felt absurd. I commented just two words under that post. [How touching.] Her call came in almost the second I hit send. She sounded furious. “Efim, do you have to be so sarcastic? “It’s just an anniversary. How old are you? Why are you still celebrating such childish anniversaries?” From our first year of marriage to the present, her “tip-offs from informants” and “special circumstances” always took precedence over our promises. This time, she could not even be bothered to come up with a plausible excuse. I did not say anything. I hung up and blocked her number. This marriage was over.

All I wanted was a man for my mother, a man who will fill her, make her happy. But I made the worst mistake of my life by choosing it...

On the night of her engagement, Aria Sinclair catches her fiancé cheating, with the daughter of a rival mafia boss. Humiliated and shattered, She goes to a club and end up getting intimate with a strange man. On a quest for revenge for her fiancee's betrayal, she decides to marry his father. But what will she do when she finds out his father is the same man she encountered at the club?

He’s a single dad with a leather vest and a whole world of secrets. She’s a second-grade teacher who’s about to break all the rules. Deacon "Grim" Miller, the Sergeant-at-Arms of the Ravens MC, has only ever lived by two codes: the one for his club and the one for his daughter, Lily. He’s a man built for battle, a survivor in a world of ruthless rivalries. But at home, he’s just a father trying to give his little girl a normal life… a life she can't have because of the trauma of his past. Amelia Vance is a woman who values order, routine, and safety above all else. When she notices Lily is struggling, she’s determined to help, but the last thing she expects is to meet the child's father… a man whose presence feels like a storm she should run from. Their two worlds should never collide. He’s a danger to her well-ordered life. She’s a threat to the secrets he guards. But when a fire drill triggers Lily's deep-seated trauma and a rival gang's patch shows up in the child's pocket, Deacon is left with a choice: push Amelia away or let her in, risking everything he holds dear. To save the child they both love, they'll have to face the truth and a danger that might tear them apart forever.

I am so dead! He is sucking my blood!!! The feeling is driven me crazy...However, that was my very choice.

“He was supposed to be my girlfriend’s dad. Unsteadiness, he became my master. Content Warning: This book contains explicit sexual themes, BDSM dynamics, power imbalance, and taboo relationships. Recommended for readers 18+ only. Damian doesn’t just want Eli’s body. He wants his submission. And under Damian’s gaze, Eli finds himself pulled into a world of power, control, and pleasure that tests every boundary he thought he had. Loyalty and betrayal. Fear and longing. Obedience and surrender. The deeper Eli falls, the harder it becomes to hide the truth—from Lily, from Damian, and from himself. My Girlfriend’s Dad is a forbidden gay romance for mature readers, featuring themes of BDSM, secrecy, and the intoxicating pull of wanting what you should never touch

When I'm seven years old, my dad turns me in to the Court Judgment of the Born Wicked because of my tendency to vomit. If I'm found guilty, my blood ties with my dad will be forcibly severed. Then, I'll be sent to prison. Everyone claims that Dad is just making a fuss over nothing. "Your daughter is still so young, so it's natural for her to fall ill. As a father, you should be more considerate toward her." But when the evidence is shown, everyone clamps up immediately. There was once when Dad drank so much to the point he suffered from gastric bleeding. The business contract that he managed to convince his client to sign was all soiled because I vomited on him as soon as he got home. Thanks to me, the contract was voided. Dad got fired on the spot. During Bryce Fuller, my older brother's birthday, I vomited onto his birthday cake in front of his classmates. Because of that, Bryce was isolated by all of his classmates. He became so depressed that he tried to slit his wrist in an attempt to take his own life. I'll keep vomiting everywhere, be it at the dining table or on my bed. Dad and Bryce have to clean me up more than 30 times every day. They suffer greatly because of me. What angers everyone the most is that after I'm done vomiting, I'll laugh at everyone in a provocative manner. The judge gives his verdict instantly, claiming that I'm wicked by nature. Bryce's eyes redden immediately. As he cries, he tells me that he can't bear to see me leaving him. I never shed any tears, nor do I throw a tantrum. Instead, I accept the judge's verdict calmly, but with a prerequisite condition that the judge finishes watching my memories. The judge is shocked, to say the least. "We'll have to crack your skull open in order to extract your memories. You'll be in a world of pain. Are you sure about that?" I nod in determination. But Bryce, on the other hand, looks alarmed. "I won't agree to that!"