Black Goat's Egg Novels & Stories

The Healing Cave The mountain trail sorta fizzled out into this scrawny goat path, barely wide enough for, well, a goat. Lyra led the crew, everyone dead on their feet, up into the jagged peaks that hugged the Shadowwood. Down below, somewhere behind them, that ancient evil they’d wrangled at the stone circle… yeah, still sealed, but definitely nu could feel the nastiness leeching into the woods like motor oil in a puddle. Sanctuary was the name of the game now, somewhere that rotten magic couldn’t touch.

“He said you have the Eco-friendly kind. Vegan. Made from recycled goat skin, in baby milk flavor.” Logan wheezes. Damion bursts into laughter. So does Kiara. “I’m going to kill him,” Enrique growls, red in the face. “I am actually going to kill my fucking twin.” River just nods. “You should. He said if you don’t use the special kind, your tiny dingemadong swells up like a baked potato … and that’s why Aria screams.” Doesn’t the man have any boundaries? Lili stares at me in horror. “You scream at his dingemadong?”

Felicia affirmed, "I can confirm that there was no precious Moose cheese in the teacup. Instead, there was goat cheese with a similar appearance." Emily inquired curiously, "What is goat cheese?" Jadeite calmly explained, "Goat cheese is, of course, a low-cost item and can't compare to the value of Moose cheese." Emily's face showed astonishment, "Wait, are you saying that Third Miss switched Madam's Moose cheese? Oh my, Third Miss, how could you do that!" Emma looked coldly at her, "Fifth Younger Sister, the matter hasn't been clarified yet. Please refrain from making baseless accusations."

As expected, with a stronger temperature, Samuel found that something seemed to be burning wildly in the angle of 50 degrees below him. At the innermost part of it, something faintly discernible seemed to appear. However, when he saw that blurry thing, Samuel was beginning to doubt his life. Fuck! What the hell was that? An egg? Not to mention an ant egg, even if you say it's a dragon egg, Samuel still thought... It was bullshit? That... that didn't look like an egg at all, but like... a round mountain...

"Just... just this..." The priest sniffed it. He sighed heavily. "This is 'Seed of Pan'. A cheap satyr fertility drug. Thirty days straight guarantees a baby. But it never causes birth defects this bad." His voice turned deadly serious. "Unless... someone took a massive overdose." Guards dragged a satyr in right away. The half-man, half-goat looked terrified. "It's not my fault! I just followed the ancient recipe!" he cried. Evadne lunged like a wild animal. She choked the satyr. "You liar! You said thirty days! Why does my baby look like this?"