Cow Joke Novels & Stories

We're celebrating my son, Baby Selwyn, turning a month old. I'm walking past the pool with him in my arms when someone shoves me from behind. Colin Selwyn jumps into the pool like a madman. He saves us and immediately rushes us to the hospital. Baby Selwyn makes it out alive because of the timely rescue. When I open my eyes again, Baby Selwyn and Colin aren't by my side. I sit up while coughing and remove the needle inserted into my hand. I leave the hospital room and head for the pediatric department, wanting to see Baby Selwyn. However, as I walk past the emergency room, I hear Colin talking to a doctor. "We managed to save the child from drowning, Mr. Selwyn. Why has he now died of asphyxiation?" "I smothered him. Per the plan, he was never supposed to make it out alive!" "But why? He's your son!" "I promised Sandy that I would make our child the Selwyn family's sole heir. Lucille should never have given birth to Baby Selwyn." Colin's tone is gentle and calm, yet his words are cold and cruel. I've always thought I had a loving marriage, but it's just a joke! I've already lost my beloved son, and my heartless husband is the one behind his death. I don't want him anymore!

After being cheated by her beloved boyfriend, Joan Green decided to revenge him. She slept with his uncle, her future uncle-in-law, Noah Hugo, the last kid in the Hugo family, almost the same age with her Ex-boyfriend Fletcher. He was a top and outstanding billionaire in the entire state, having women by his side or sleeping with them was never his desire. Work and Women, are his whole world. Joan contacted and seduced Noah via her private account but she was rejected because Noah knew who she was. 「Wanna F?」 「Pretty. But I don’t fuck my nephew’s girl.」 Joan was furious when she saw his reply, but she didn’t expect that Noah would drink with her at the same pub.She was embarrassed and wanted to escape from him. But he asked her the same question「Wanna F?」 and then... Joan slept with him all night. After she wake up, she just found out that Noah knew her full name. He even knew her cousin Karen Green. That meant Noah knew Joan’s ex-boyfriend betrayed her? Or did he also play trick on her and regard her as a joke!? Joan was in a rage and delete him directly! What if Noah was a scum like Fletcher, then he would never contact Joan again and showed everyone that Joan was a stupid woman. But why? Noah's message was lying on her list again: 「Give me one more chance.」

After I married Riccardo, the Don of the Moretti family, he paraded a string of mistresses in front of me. He never gave me a second glance. But on our tenth anniversary—right after my father’s death—he suddenly promised me half of his empire. The catch? In return, he planned to seize control of all my family’s arms-dealing routes. That pissed off his favorite mistress. She cornered him on his yacht, demanding he take his words back. Then she fell overboard and died. An “accident.” After she died, Riccardo went insane. He took it all out on me. He tied me to the back of his yacht. He dragged me through the sea, a human anchor, until the rocks shattered my legs, crippling me for life. I became the family’s shame. Then, as I lay helpless, he finished the job with poison. Then I opened my eyes. I was back on the day Angelo Marino—the head of our rival family—proposed to me. In my last life, my family forced me to say no. He came for me, a one-man army. He killed Riccardo, but died in the process. This time, I looked at his kind face and nodded. Yes. But as we embraced, Riccardo appeared. He ripped me from Angelo's arms and claimed me as his own. That’s when I realized the cruelest joke of all. My monster was back, too.

"What's an Omega like you doing here?" he sneered. "Don't you belong in the slum, or something?" His friends snickered at his cruel joke, and I felt my cheeks burn with embarrassment. I tried to ignore them and head to the empty table, but Eric wouldn't let it go. "Look at her, pretending to be a real wolf," Eric sneered. "As if an Omega could ever be anything more than a loser." *********************** Shannon’s life has always been hard as an Omega. She is bullied and abused by the pack members everyday. She has only one wish: to find her true love on her eighteenth birthday and runaway with him. But her hopes are shattered when she finds out she is mated to Alpha Eric, the most desired Alpha in school. Eric rejects her blatantly and taunts her publicly for being weak. She moves to a different pack, hoping to start afresh but things are not quite different there. She has new stepbrothers, the Alphas triplet sons, who turn out to be her worst bullies. They hate Shannon and her mom for trying to take their dead mother’s place. But what happens when they find out that they are all mated to the girl they humiliate constantly? There’s a struggle for her, each one desiring to have her for himself. But Shannon can only choose one of them but must she? Will she end up with all three brothers and how will she navigate her complex relationship with them?

At the Colonetti family banquet in New York, I stood in the center of the grand hall with more than a dozen girls from different families, all of us waiting to be chosen. Victor, the heir of the Colonetti family, was supposed to announce his fiancée tonight. Along with that announcement, he would present her with the family heirloom, a lily brooch. As an illegitimate daughter of the family, I understood that if I didn’t receive that brooch tonight, it meant I would be sent to Chicago for an arranged marriage. Victor, who had once promised to marry me, changed his mind without warning. With a smile, he pinned the lily brooch onto the chest of the woman standing beside me instead. Then, he leaned close to my ear and whispered, “Let your sister Emily have her moment today. She’s also an illegitimate daughter like you, and she’s also never been valued growing up. Don’t worry. With me here, no one will force you into an arranged marriage.” Even as I looked at him with pleading eyes, he reached out and let Emily take his arm. “Emily is kind and gracious,” he said. “She deserves the lily brooch.” Those words—kind and gracious—turned me into the joke of the entire evening. The next day, I boarded a flight to Chicago alone, but Victor panicked. He used every connection he had and managed to ground every flight heading to Chicago.

VENGEFUL EX-WIFE STRIKES BACK! “We are having a baby,” Nina announced with a wide smile. Asher slammed his fist on the table. “Is this a joke, Nina? How can you be so shameless?!” He pointed a finger at her. She was confused at his sudden outburst. “What are you saying?” “You and I know that thing you are carrying is not mine!” Her lips quivered. “It’s your baby, Asher.” “Cut the crap! I’m sterile!” “What?” She gasped in shock. Nina was excited to announce her pregnancy to those she considered family, only for her husband, Asher, to curse her out and claim to be sterile. Her life crumbles when her husband divorces her to be with her long-time best friend, Andrea. Cheated by her husband, cast away from her home, and humiliated by those she trusted, Nina vowed to get her revenge. Xander Jackson is one of New York’s favorite young billionaires. He is the innovative CEO of the Multi-Billionaire X&J Empire. Xander has everything: a billion-dollar mansion, perfect looks, and power. But he has secrets of his own. Nina met Xander, an ex who is still holding on to the feelings from the past, and he’s ready to do anything to have her back in his life. He is willing to go all out for her, but Nina wants one thing: Revenge. What happens when old flames rekindle? Will Nina be able to get her desired revenge?

They say that psychos can never love. But what if a psycho falls in love? It sounds like a joke, doesn't it? But he punishes the people who make fun of his love in front of him. A ticket to hell. He is a psycho, A serial killer, A ruthless ruler, And what else? An Obsessed Lover. His heart decided to beat again, only after seeing her. He was drawn to her not only by her beauty but by her innocence. Because even the devil himself feeds on innocent souls. Her laughter settled in his ear. Her smile gave him breath and her face made his heart beat. Having found the reason to live once again, now he did not want to lose it. Now she had become a means of living for him. Why? Because have we not known from the beginning that love conquers all? Her innocent love conquered his evil but in the midst of all this, she lost her soul. How? Because he snatched it from her. He used his evil ways to get her and that is how he broke her. Injured her. And that was the reason, she could not love him back It was complicated. A pure venom was inflicted by him. In her. It was so toxic that it just made her soul leave her body. His insanity proved fatal. But whatever others say, the feeling was pure. It was naive and that is why it is still called Love.

We were on our way to celebrate our son’s birthday when we got into a car crash. When I woke up, I looked at my family gathered around my hospital bed and cracked a joke: “Sorry, but who are you guys?” I held back a smile, curious to see how they'd humor their "amnesiac" patient. Would my mother grab my hand in a panic? Would my husband look at me with worry? Would my son rush over, crying and calling me Mom? What I didn't expect was for them to freeze for a moment—and then, almost in unison, let out sighs of relief. My mother was the first to speak, her tone unmistakably lighter, as if a huge weight had been lifted. "If you don’t remember, it’s probably for the best. This is Lindsay—your sister, she’s my daughter. You were adopted." My husband then pointed at me and said to our son, "You should call her Aunt Wendy." Before the shock could even sink in, I watched the child I'd fought so hard to protect turn and throw himself into the arms of Lindsay. "Mom! I played outside all day. I missed you so much!" So that was the truth. My amnesia was exactly what they'd been hoping for. In that case, I didn't need this made-up life anymore.

Ophelia, the daughter of Ryan and Avery, was the only survivor of the attack on the moonshine pack in the southern region. Losing her entire pack made her a Lone wolf. Hated and despised by her own kind. Her father made a request when their pack was attacked. She was to find her uncle and deliver a message. Which inadvertently sends her on a journey to the north. Ophelia had always wanted to be free, to make her own choices and experience human love, not a forced bond. She wanted to love on her own terms, but nature had set her on a different course. During this journey, Ophelia discovers that she is mated to the Monarch, and it is her second shot at life. As if playing a cruel joke on them, nature paired a Lonewolf with the Monarch, a man with no tolerance for weakness, to a woman born from an ordinary wolf. A woman who did not even want a mate. Ophelia cannot morph into her wolf until she fully remembers who she is. Her body has to merge with her soul to trigger the transformation process; she is set on a quest to remember. She uncovers secrets she discovered in her past life, and with the help of Aaron, her mate, they unravel the mystery behind the existence of the half-bloods and identify the traitor in their ranks. Together, they save humanity from the torment brought to them by the half-bloods, rescue the captured wolves, and avenge their fallen heroes (her parents). They bring order back to the world. Proving that love can be found in the most unusual of places.

Eight years into marriage, and Fabian's mom finally gave me and my son her stamp of approval. Invited us to spend Christmas in his hometown. My son—Luca--and I were hyped. We picked out a gift for her and hit the road with Fabian. Right as we pulled into the village, Fabian's old friend called—crying, claiming she'd crashed her car. Fabian panicked. Left me and Luca in some random snowy mountain town and sped off. It was pitch black. Snow dumping down. Then Luca screamed. He'd stepped on a trap and dropped into a pit. Blood everywhere. I called Fabian, totally panicked. He goes, "Stella, Roxana's in a wreck. I need to be with her. Stop making everything a competition." Then he hung up. Blocked me. No time to fall apart. I wiped my face, called an ambulance. Too far out. By the time they got there, Luca was already gone. Cold. Broken. Gone. I held him and screamed until my lungs gave out. Meanwhile, Roxana's posting in the social media. All smiles in Fabian's arms. His face soft. Loving. [Highway jam turned into truth or dare. One word—"accident"—and he came flying. So happy.] I exhaled. Tagged Fabian. [Let's get a divorce.] This joke of a marriage should've ended forever ago.